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AnonymousTopic: Too Little, Too Late
I found this article that you should take a look at:-
http://relatingtomen.com/gender-politics/social-justice/a-note-to-the-menfolk/
Full article:-
Written by Hellena Post
Once upon a time I was a radical lesbian feminist. I’d come to that position from having indifferent, dodgy, and invisible connections with men in my childhood, having been molested as a child, and probably partly being really p~~~ed off that my dad had left me and died when I was 7. After being brought up a fundamentalist Christian, I rejected the concept that men were better than me because they had a dick. And when I birthed my first daughter I realised that there was a whole lot more to this mother/birthing/woman thing than I’d been told. I read ‘Women Who Run With The Wolves’ and Mary Daly, Barbara Walker, Alice Walker, Dale Spender, and a host of other feminist writers, and got really really mad. Furious that my lineage of strong women had been kept from me. Enraged that men had taken over the world and turned it into warfare and cruelty. Brandished the word ‘patriarchy’ as a bludgeon, and attended women’s groups.
Not long after my re-education, I had a fling with a woman and slowly but surely morphed into a lesbian feminist that teetered on the edge of separatism. I seriously entertained the notion of living a life surrounded by women only, to give my energy to my sisters who had been so oppressed. I read books on lifting the curse of menstruation, coming to terms with the crone of menopause, and understanding the backlash against feminism in the fashion and cosmetic industries. I learnt about ancient strong women who had been crucified for their difference, and many a treatise on the ancient matrifocal role models that needed rekindling. I knew that fat was a feminist issue, and abortions and child care. I heard about the glass ceiling and the tall poppy syndrome and read books about how the science of gynaecology was rooted in the barbaric acts of footbinding, sutee, the burning times, and genital mutilation. I knew about equal rights and equal pay, how contraception was a feminist issue as well. In fact, I learnt that everything to do with a woman and her sexuality were feminist issues – except birth and motherhood – unless it was about throwing off the shackles of them.
Men were the enemy.
They were shallow and aggressive and abusive and rapists and liars and adulterers and threatening and sexist and privileged and everything that was wrong with the world. There were always a few men that I considered to be ‘worthwhile’, but they always had to endure my rather pointed opinions about their gender as a ticket to my world. Listen to my conversations with my sisters about the state of the world, with liberal doses of the use of the word patriarchal sprinkled on top. And I knew an incredible amount of little anecdotes about amazing women who had been f~~~ed over or ignored by men. If only the goddess would come back and put women in their rightful place as the bosses of everything, then we’d all be a lot happier.
Much to my dismay, I soon learnt that the women’s utopia I’d leapt into wholeheartedly wasn’t all that groovy afterall. I saw just as much alcoholism, abuse, hypocrisy, gossip, backstabbing and power play as I saw in all the other minority and mainstream groups I’d been a part of. My relationship broke down, and I had some flings with women and men for a while, and then decided to leave the place where I’d paraded a lot of my different uniforms and badges. I started off fresh in a different place to try and work out what I really thought about it all. And one of the first things I realised was that I’d never really had brothers, fathers, or men friends, cause I’d kept them out for years after realising they were all f~~~ed.
And then I met the love of my life.
The first man I’d ever come across who treated me with the utmost respect even though I was ‘easy’. Who wasn’t afraid of my strength and sexuality. I was in love. I went back home and decided I wanted one just like him, but not him cause he was far too damaged. So I wrote about our time together. And when the book was done I took myself off on a trip through the desert in January, in my beat up old Gemini that couldn’t go faster than 80km’s an hour or it would overheat. And I met men and father figures and brothers the whole way up, made peace with my father, and discovered my feminine side, that I’d never felt safe enough to explore before. I had a cleavage! And sometimes it proved very handy when it came to getting help and advice from the opposite sex.
On the way home I bumped into my love again, our love story started weaving itself through our lives, and I determined to find out more about how I could love and trust men again. One of the first things I did was read ‘Manhood’ by Steve Biddulph, and it taught me a lot. I’d never before pieced together the perception that after the industrial revolution, boys had lost their fathers, brothers, uncles and grand fathers, as they’d all gone off to work. And in the vacuum of role models they saw in their immediate experience, had to put together these cardboard cutouts that were a pastiche of movies, and books and magazines they read, rather than actual experience. Whereas women had mothers, sisters and grandmothers showing them everyday how to be a woman. Which I’ve got to say right now, is often how to emotionally manipulate, withdraw affection to get what she wants, steer things in an unnoticeable way, and create a supportive gossipy network of other women to keep fingers to the pulse of their worlds. At the same time as exploring emotional depths, learning how to keep men happy whilst hiding bits considered unattractive, and creating a supportive network with other women to make sense of the world. (Please understand that I’m talking in broad generalisations here, mixed with my personal experience, and I’m not suggesting this is always the case for women or men, and I’m also talking about myself as well)
When my love and I really seriously got together, we would neither of us have thought we were sexist….yet I was definitely more pro woman, and he was definitely a bit snarky about women and the way he felt branded as a rapist just cause he had a penis.
I was there when he was crying and howling and beautifully eloquent about how much he loved the planet in all it’s intricacies, yet was the gender associated with despoiling it.
Both of us had horrid childhoods that we needed to heal and grow from, and both of us started as we continued, with the policy of no secrets, and the aim of complete personal and couple honesty between us. I love this man more than any other person I’ve ever come across in my life, and he makes sense to me more than any other as well. He’s warm and hairy, he’s soft and smells better than anything in the world to me, he’s intelligent and witty and has deep deep thoughts, he has a strong sense of justice and equity for everyone and thing on the planet, he gets angry and grumpy, and he was p~~~ed off with the characters available to him as a man in this period piece, and also with a lot of the attitudes he comes across in women just because of his gender. The theories I’d spouted for years about men and women were suddenly caustic and prone to causing bruised feelings. At first I gentled a lot of my theories about men and women just to avoid annoying him, and cause I loved him so much I wanted him to feel good about himself. But then life stepped in the way to give me some experience.I was there when he was trying to put together tricky irrigation for a market garden, and had a massive tantrum about how he didn’t know how to do it, and how could he go and ask someone for advice without looking like a dickhead? He spat about how as a man he was expected to know how to fix a car and a house and put together machines and do all these odd jobs and take charge with sex and work to ‘provide’ …….all without anyone ever really showing him. He felt like he’d always just been expected to ‘know’ because he was a bloke. And looked down on if he didn’t know how to perform a ‘manly’ task properly. We had another fella staying with us at the time, and they both had a session about how hard it was to be a man in our society.
I was there to witness his pain and isolation when as a survivor of abuse from both men and women, he remembered trying to buy a book to help him with his issues, and found they were all addressed to women and agreed that men were the abusers.
I was there when he was crying and howling and beautifully eloquent about how much he loved the planet in all it’s intricacies, yet was the gender associated with despoiling it.
I was there to hear his heartbreaking ache that there were no men in his world that he could look up to and admire.
And around then was when I stopped being sensitive to men because I loved my man, and started being sensitive to men because I was seeing things that didn’t add up. Like how men are portrayed as unbelievably aggressive, dominating and ‘manly’, or totally bumbling buffoons that never quite get anything right, but are lovable nonetheless. All the hundreds of little ways that men are told that they’re a bit dumb, as portrayed by main stream media in a ‘mere male’ kinda way. How we’re meant to be a male dominated society, but there’s no acknowledgement of realistic archetypes for men beyond being the provider, warrior, king or hero. No equivalent of the cycles of maiden, mother and crone that women experience. Men often don’t have the emotionally deep friendship networks that women have, so when faced with relationship issues, sexual problems, or struggles with identity, they endure it on their own. How there’s little importance placed on men as fathers, beyond donating sperm, and then going out to work to pay for what it created. How thousands of men are scared of touching their children, rough playing with their kids, and showing physical love and comfort for fear of being suspected of being an abuser. And I could never quite get that we lived in a patriarchal society, supposedly dominated by men, yet men who didn’t fit in with the prescribed roles and were feminine, gentle, alternative, anarchistic, or deviated from the very narrow allowances for what men were…….were shamed and given a drubbing as bad as any given to a woman or child.
Where is the representation of fathers in the world of birthing, and why are the fathers often invisible in birthing stories? Where is the representation of fathers in bringing up children, and how can their importance and gifts go largely unacknowledged? I’ll never forget reading a description of manhood by Vicki Noble in the Motherpeace tarot cards, that described men living in a tribal situation as the hunters and musicians, the inventors and the crafters, the even tempered conspirers of fun with the children. And I’ve bounced this concept off men along the way, and virtually every one could relate to this kind of approach rather than that of lord, king and rule maker. Shrugging off the assumed masculine mantle of power is not a difficult journey for many.
I started talking about these things with other men, and was surprised by the effusive gratitude they had for a strong woman being kind to their gender. We were locals in a country pub, and having a drink one day, a fella named Hairy Dave told me to go read a joke on a board at the back of the pub. He told me I’d love it. So I did. There was a sheet of paper, that read “Men are like a deck of cards. You need a heart to love one, a diamond to marry one, a club to beat them with, and a spade to bury them”. I thought it was horrible. When I came back he was already laughing, expecting me to join in. “What did you think? Funny eh!” he said. “Nope” I said. “I think it’s terrible, and if anyone said stuff like that about my man I’d slap em”. You shoulda seen the look on his face. “Really?” he said. “You really didn’t think it was funny?” He couldn’t believe it. He ended up kneeling in front of me and kissing my hand, he was so overjoyed that a woman could possibly not sn~~~~~ at the chance of having a dig at men. Which opened up a great discussion about men and women and all the rest of it.
And I’m sorry, but I just don’t buy the ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’ trip. I think it’s just another brick in the wall of our disease of separation. And from life experience, I don’t think there’s any difference between the genders (apart from their bodies) that contemplation, honest communication, and deep introspection couldn’t bridge, for both genders. And that whole ‘if women ran the world there’d be no more war’ thing gets up my nose too. Tell that to the Amazonians, and Boudicca, and Kali the Destroyer, and Fu Hao of the Shang Dynasty, and the Spartan Princess Arachidamia, and Margaret Thatcher, and Condoleeza Rice, and Bronwyn Bishop, and Australia’s current Prime Minister, and Ghandi, and Buddha and Christ……they were all dudes that said not to kill people weren’t they? It’s not gender that creates war and the separations between us all, it’s hierarchies. By their very nature there’s someone at the top, and a whole bunch of disempowered folk underneath, that are ordered to do things they would not necessarily do if left to their own devices. We could all choose instead the model of the wheel for decision making and creating order from the chaos in our societies…..a wheel where every spoke is equally important and necessary to the whole, and none is above or below the other.
At this point I need to mention that I personally also feel let down by the womens movement when it comes to my experiences with birthing and motherhood. After 8 birthing experiences and learning from my children and witnessing the incredible influence of a father in a family that hasn’t been seperated, and through observing the vast amount of self awareness, contemplation and pattern busting that’s ensued, I just can’t buy the feminist opinion that motherhood and birth are ‘lesser’ paths, and that if I was really empowered I’d be Prime Minister. Instead I believe now from my own experience, that motherhood and fatherhood and birth and children are actually as valid a path to enlightenment as any other, and in my opinion at least, far superior to most. In actualising my evolutionary mammalian imperative, I find my perspectives on a vast array of matters and my self awareness, fears faced, and internal tool kit to be well worth the effort of taking the path less travelled. And I’ve witnessed a similar journey in my love and the father of our children.
And more recently I’ve been really tripping out about circumcision. It’s Male Genital Mutilation. And it happens within days of being born. 99.9 percent of the willies that I’ve seen in my life have been circumcised. (And I’ve seen a lot……I had to f~~~ my way out of total fundamentalist Christian sexual repression don’t you know) Without anaesthetic. A sexual, intimate, uber sensitive part of a man’s body and sexuality is cut off. Like a male friend once said….”How could I not have a problem with men? The first man I met pulled me out of my mother and slapped me on the arse, and the second one cut off my foreskin….” I’m still totally stunned and overwhelmed by the fact that as a general rule, and with everything that is discussed about Female Genital Mutilation and the repercussions of it……that there is no fuss made about circumcisions which no-one can deny is the same thing. The same thing. With no help groups and books and seminars and news reports and documentaries created about it. Barely any men are given sympathy for the mutilation they endured as a baby, a totally sentient, sensitive, and hyper aware little person, days after emerging from the womb. That s~~~ totally trips me out.
I’ve also had this theory for a while, that movements happen in three waves.
We haven’t been under the rule of Patriarchy, but of Powerarchy. And because we’ve been so busy hunting the oppressor behind the guise of men or religion or science……..we’ve neglected to notice that the oppressor was within us all along in the form of our attitudes.
The first movement is the radical extreme that people are shocked by, the second movement is the main stream that takes a little longer to get it, and the third movement is the people who were dead against it when it happened, but get it last as everyone else around them is already there. So if you applied that theory to feminism, the first wave was the Suffragettes leading up to the radical 60’s, and then the concept became more mainstream, and now it’s common to see even the radical right roll their eyes and snipe a bit about their menfolk. And the result is that men have received body blow after body blow after body blow about who they are, what’s expected of them, and what they ‘should’ be.And I’ve known a lot of sensitive and deep thinking men who are really disturbed and distraught by this. And can sometimes suffer the death of a thousand cuts, a thousand barbs about the thuggery of their gender, and how much they have to be ashamed of.
Through my life experience and interest led research over the years, I declare that I think the term Patriarchy is misleading. I don’t believe that the enemy that we’ve all sought out in each other all these long years is gender related, or religiously related, or sexually related, or environmentally related or anything at all to do, with anything other than the attitudes of power hunger, greed, control and hierarchies, that started to hold sway around 2,000 years ago, using many different vehicles, but the main one being the body of the Roman Catholic church, created in 325ad at the Council of Nicea, when the flagging Roman Empire voted on which religion to use to establish firm hierarchical control of the state. We started to get split up from our family groups and communities, taught to give loyalty to those based on ideals rather than heart, and then during the Industrial Revolution got further splintered into men going off there to work, and women going there to keep house, and children going off there to school. We haven’t been under the rule of Patriarchy, but of Powerarchy. And because we’ve been so busy hunting the oppressor behind the guise of men or religion or science……..we’ve neglected to notice that the oppressor was within us all along in the form of our attitudes. We’re all disempowered in a society that doesn’t accept us for who we truly are. Because we are all unique sparks of the universe, living an earthly life to express infinity. Men, Women, Children, all of us have our hurts and our repressions, suppressions and oppressions, and none of us are free until our true and authentic selves are respected.
So as a woman who was once upon a time a radical lesbian feminist…….
I’d like to say I’m sorry.
To the men who feel so alone and isolated within their pain that they see no other course than to end their lives. To the men who have dissolved into fear in the bottom of a beer glass. To the men who have to go off to work when their heart stays at home. To the boys who listen to their mothers talking to their girlfriends about the latest bastard thing their man did. To the men who listen to a thousand reports about another man somewhere who did something bad. To the men desperately wanting a boundary and never getting one. To the men who feel closed out and blamed by a sisterhood of tight knit women. To the men that desperately want to be fathers, but are kept away from it by one or another heirarchy……..
I see you and I love you and I know you really wish it could be better.
I’ve got five sons and I want them to grow free and respectful of themselves and each other, and with a sense of purpose and of being who they really are. In fact I think I’d really like that for everyman. And woman. And child. And living creature. And planet. And universe, within which we are one……..
“This piece is dedicated to my love Currawong, and in memory of the beautiful Michael Lusty. Who took his life before I could have this conversation with him. May he find the peace and love that he thought he’d lost…….
Image Source: Pixabay
Her article reminds me of the women who rode the c~~~ carousel hard in their youth and now when they are old, they are finally ready for the nice guy or the good man and she wants to say sorry.
That’s really cute but its too little, too late.
AnonymousThose kind of policies are so damn femstapo it will only increase the number of men stampeding away from THE WORST GENERATIONS OF WOMEN TO EVER BREATH AIR!
They can raise the punishment for being single to hanging by the neck until dead! I’ll bring my own f~~~ing rope to court!
P.S. (food for thought MGTOW)
I’m addressing the social engineers of feminism that have (by-law) with their Misandrist educations and gender bias institutions of government (all part of a feminist liberal progressive onslaught with it’s seed planted 12/23/1913) overthrowing a society that (once upon a time) cultured sustainability, longevity, prosperity, and genuine citizenry, when the man was the head of the family, and not the government! He had control and final say! Now he ranks below the children and above the dog.
It is “you” Mizzzzzz progressive C~~~, we have all this to blame on! You’ve lead us into the jaws of destruction! Bit by bit, piece by piece, you have successfully rearranged the order, thanks, but no thanks, I will not be lawfully transformed into your dog. F~~~ YOU! F~~~ MARRIAGE! F~~~ YOUR LAW!A man demoted to that of a dog will surly become a f~~~ing MG-bastard. We’re your ever-loving MG-bastards of MGTOW, thanks for all the misery, enjoy your immigrants and enjoy your new family, eight or ten cats!
It you’re not MGTOW, YOU’RE F~~~ED!
Topic: My intro
After 57 years of running I decided to take a break.
Six months ago I found myself in such a horrible position, no car Health in disrepair just broke up with a girl I have been drinking not taking care of myself I am 30 pounds underweight and I don’t want to look in the mirror.
Obviously that’s not the way we want to find ourselves after 57 years of life on this f~~~ing planet. How did I get here? what the f~~~ is wrong with people? What is wrong with me why don’t I get along with women? Why the f~~~ do they always turn into psychos?I was a pretty happy kid raised in a home where my parents both worked (mom part-time). My mom was pretty manipulative and my dad pretty distant which describes every other kid who grew up in the sixties and seventies. Our parents were off doing better stuff then taking care of us, so myself and all the kids I knew got into a lot of trouble. Growing up in Los Angeles there is an awful lot for a kid to get into trouble with, and I did. Where I got into the most trouble was when I met my first wife. Of course back then I was so stupid I didn’t know what I was doing and I White Knighted and mangina’d my way into getting some pussy. This was kind of the pattern of my youth. We didn’t really have a Pua culture more like just do whatever you can to get laid. Along the way I found drugs and alcohol which when combined with female attention can be a very deadly combination. I was to find this out in Spades later.
My mom was a second wave feminist so growing up I heard all that bulls~~~, League of Women Voters, peo – all that 1970s women crap yep I grew up hearing the second wave.
My ex-wife was 15 when I met her in 1979 and I was 20. Both of us had no business getting married and especially we had absolutely no business having children two years after we met. For all men out there who don’t know any better, oxytocin does very strange things to our thinking, it makes us stupid. So in a zombie-like trance I walked into marriage @ 22. Children at 25. Along the way I discovered the joy of being a man because although I was married to this bitch I still found a way to enjoy making a living. I started out unemployed became a welder fabricated machinery learned how to work on jet engines you get the idea pretty much all the funny s~~~ you can think of back in the day in Burbank California. I got sick of working for the man so I started buying and selling cars which was great because I had plenty of time off all the time I could take my kids on vacation anytime I wanted to all the joys of self employment.
I became a stockbroker and a professional in the financial services industry a job which I held for 15 years. I am very proud of the fact that I never graduated high school and yet I ended up managing millions and millions of dollars. One aspect of mgtow for you young man is that anything is entirely possible when you have gone your own way if even somebody like me – who in a blue pill coma, can become a broker, money manager insurance company exec. Do you think a woman who could not graduate high school could ever achieve such lofty goals f~~~ no.I stayed married to this bitch for 28 years, we had two children both daughters. During our marriage the word divorce was mentioned at least 3 or 4 times a day in response to any argument I would have to her bitchiness or just downright meanness. Daily sometimes hourly s~~~ tests, made-up dreamed up problems for me to solve only to be disregarded, so many weird little mind games. Looking back over 30 years I don’t know how the f~~~ I survived it I don’t know how any of us survived it but we did.
I always heard that you had to stay for the sake of the children and I felt that way because I knew how unstable this woman was by the way the children acted. Looking Back Now if I had been a social worker I would have pulled those children out of that home. Of course with an unstable Woman as a mother I thought that if I divorced her I would certainly lose my children (because this is California) and have to pay her and pay for the children so I just sucked it up and stayed. Not the smartest choice but I did not want to put my children at risk.
So after 28 years of marriage and both children had moved out of the house I filed for divorce in November of 2007. Just like the bitch that she is she got an attorney and then filed a countersuit which is absolutely ridiculous because it’s a no-fault state. Needless to say that the divorce was absolutely horrible I lost all my gynocentric friends after she spread rumors that I had molested my own daughters and beaten her just so she could get attention from all the blue pill mangina available men in her life. However because she is so unstable she acted like a complete tool in court and forgot like half of everything that she was supposed to ask for. So for the sake of argument let’s just say that she got the shaft by bending over and asking for it. I ended up buying her out of the house for 150k. It was so worth it. I am I agreed on $500 a month spousal because we have been married so long and this stupid unstable bitch goes out and find some blue pill beta male provider within 3 months and gets married. That’s where her spousal support ended is the way it works here in Arizona.
In the meantime a woman moved in of course a single mother and she became my live-in submissive. She was a very nice girl very wealthy heiress and the kids were good kids but they were not my kids. Looking back how f~~~ed up is that to raise somebody else’s children no way no bueno. I started having the kind of sex that you see in porn movies and it escalated to the point where we started taking ecstasy and going to strip clubs. She spiraled out of control on drugs and I had to recover from an operation on my neck, and I started using morphine which I was hooked on for 2 years. In the meantime the heiress moves out and into a rehab and I am living alone with my daughter using morphine completely f~~~ing out of it for like 2 years. Obviously I didn’t have any relationships while I was on the opiates.
In 2011 I started dating. I got on one of those dating web sites and met a woman…….. so needless to say that it really doesn’t make any difference what she looks like what her last name is or her origin because you know and I know that she is always going to turn out exactly the same way maybe in a different time frame but they always turn. I dated 25 women I think over a period of two years and I had a lot of fun it was a much different than it used to be. Because of the obvious defects of these women today none of the relationships lasted very long or we’re very meaningful not that I’ve ever had one that’s been.
So back to the point where I was six months ago looking in a mirror wondering who the f~~~ that old man is. The last relationship has really taken its toll on me like I said I was underweight suffering from depression adrenal spikes paranoia. I honestly thought that I was going to die. Perhaps the woman that I have been with was a psychopath? So I went to psychopathfree.com, hey guess what, she was a psychopath at least according to their definition. Then I went to another website about narcissists- she sounded like one of those too. Then somehow through some fluke of nature or some glitch on the internet I ended up on Sandman YouTube channel. Oh I had listen to Paul Elam over on Voice for oh I had listened to Paul Elam over on Voice for Men I had even had a session with the famous dr. T who pointed me in the direction of a book that she thought might help called Borderline Mothers (which I would highly recommend you guys to read if you have a problem that relates to your childhood and your mother).
I have to say that in my early days of just smoking weed and listening to Sandman videos my attitude and Outlook begin to get better and better with each day. I discovered Stefan molyneux Barbarossa turd flinging monkey rek’t feminist videos and the list goes on and on. I totally soaked in I totally soaked in everything that I heard like a sponge because For the First Time in life I started really enjoying reading things that men had written about themselves and the problems that they discussed spoke to me. Slowly I’ve been putting weight back on, cleaning up the wreckage of my past and present and I’m laughing again and enjoying my life.
Finally after 57 years I understand how things work a little better and I know it’s staying mgtow for me is not simply a lifestyle choice but simply a life-or-death choice.
Thanks to MGTOWAlways expect the unexpected and gird your loins appropriately. It's a no-fault jungle out there.
I’m certain that I’m not special in this aspect and I’ve become very aware of it as a MGHOW. It seems that my girlfriend is constantly and cunningly (or so she thought) asking me to volunteer information about things I’m doing in my life. I gave her information once and regretted it when the final outcome I projected didn’t go as planned. “I’m confused.” she said. “you said that blah blah blah…..”. My response was “Yes. I know what I said….I was there. Evidently, I was wrong.” Was the point that I had to admit I was wrong or that I erred in judgement? In any event, this bulls~~~ was f~~~ing irritating. So now, I never directly answer any of her questions or tell her about anything I’m doing except in the vaguest terms. Now I respond with “We’ll see. I don’t know. I hope so. I wish I knew. I’m not sure.” And other non answer answers along those lines. She says nothing but I know this irritates her. A YouTube video I watched stated that information was currency to women and I truly believe that. So, for the time being, The Bank of Quiet Thom is closed for business.
AnonymousHello Fellow MGTOW brothers,
I am excited to see that so many of us found this sanctuary called MGTOW.com. I have been at aw the past few months reading the forums. Happy to see that I am not the only one who sees the illogical cultural system in which we live.
It has been an interesting journey through life thus far. I am 40 years old, been married twice and have been in one long term relationS~~~. But it didn’t start there. I started noticing a problem with the way females act in our culture back in the early 1990s. This is where my story begins.
I grew up in a small west Texas oil town. I had a few girlfriends and one high school “sweetheart” If one could call her that. My mother and father were together during my childhood and still are today. My mother has only recently begun to latch on to the gynocentric culture. And believe me when I tell you, my dad is a miserable SOB since she discovered her new paradigm a little more than a decade ago. I can’t believe they are still together today. My dad only holds on because she will take him to the cleaners during his retirement years. So he is stuck. But I digress. Both my parents taught me that woman are fragile delicate flowers and to treat them as such. I should always have good manners and always make sure the female is treated with respect and dignity. I was actually like this and had this chivalrous way of thinking. The thing is, when I went to school or any social gathering with pears, I witnessed a different type of attitude coming from the girls. The girls who were supposed “good girls” were total whores, and arrogant bimbos. They acted as if they had something over me and other guys my age. They still expected the chivalry but acted like complete prostitutes and arrogant c~~~s. Most of the girls I encountered over my teen years were nothing but complete whores in training. From the c~~~s with money, to the hos in the projects, they were all very similar. I never really thought about the differences between what I was seeing in society and what my parents were trying to teach me. After all I was only a teenager. But when one looks back on the past, the problems we had and the solutions to them are clear as day.
I moved away from it all when I was 19. I went to work on a ranch in Wyoming for a couple years and was able to clear my head. So I thought. I “figured it all out” so I thought. From society’s teachings, I was going to find a good woman and settle down. So I moved to a small town in Wyoming and went to school. That is where I met my future wife. No better place to meet a mate than in college so I was told. At the time, I was studying photography and mathematics. I met a “great” girl who had a religious upbringing and was the perfect girl with morals and ethics so I thought. I should have known what she was when we were dating but I decided to bury my head in the blue pill sand. One day when we were dating I came by her house to find a guy’s truck parked in her parking spot. When I confronted her, she told me a lie and I believed her. It wasn’t until months later that I found out the truth. But it was too late, we had been married. She wanted to please me, I could tell, but there was a side to her that wasn’t quite right. She was a pathological liar come to find out. The whole thing had been a sham. Everything she told me about her past were all lies. She knew that I found her out and she was desperately seeking a way out of the relationship after I confronted her about her lying and unfaithfulness. She said she didn’t want to be with someone who didn’t trust her. I told her I didn’t want to be with someone who I couldn’t trust. One day, I came home for lunch and she was home. She said she wanted me to buy her a new car and that would make her happy. At this time in my life, money was not coming in as I was 21-22 years old. I told her we could not afford a car right now but later down the road I would get her something new to drive. She was very unhappy about my stance on the car and she began to cry and call me an ass hole. She wouldn’t let me leave to go back to work as she was blocking the front door so I left out the back door and went back to work. I few hours later, I was closing up the shop where I worked. A sheriff deputy pulled in and asked my boss if I was there. Of course I came running as I heard my name and thought something was wrong. The sheriff told me I was under arrest. When I asked for what, he wouldn’t tell me. After he put the cuffs on me he told me that I was under arrest for domestic violence, particularly for dropping my wife on her head. Yep, that is what she told police. I was never in anyway physical with this woman. She was such a liar. After I finally got out of jail, I went home to find my wife’s brothers and some other guy at my house ready to do battle. I just stood up to them and they eventually left. Later on I had to go to court and was order to take anger management which I did. Come to find out, she actually slammed her head against a wooden threshold on purpose so they would believe her story. And they did of course. What a c~~~! I divorced in this crazy bitch in 1999 and joined the Marine Corps at age 23. OORHA!
This is where it gets good as the lessons of the past relationship never took hold. I was under the thought process that I was unlucky and just found a bad apple. NAWALT? Right? … I made it through three years in the military without getting married. Those were the best times I had in the service. I already had someone barking orders at me and didn’t need another order barker in my face when I got home. I loved life! I could go long trips, pick up girls in bars, and make my own way. But I kept seeing my friends meet girls and marry them quickly and it seemed to be working for them. What a stupid observation on my part. The outside looking in is always better as we find out later in life.
It all changed when I returned home from the Afghan conflict. I wanted to get a wife and be happy again. The teachings of my upbringing came back to me like a vengeance. I needed a mate and that is all I focused on aside from training in the military. One day when I was home on leave, I went to fill my grandfather’s prescription at the pharmacy and there she was behind the counter. The good looking, down to earth girl I had been looking for was standing in front of me filling my grandfather’s prescription. She was like an angel. WOW, I was stupid. Just writing this makes me mad at myself all over again. Anyway, We immediately hit it off and she would come down to San Diego to visit and I would make frequent trips back home to see her. 6 months later we were married. She moved down and of course I got a bump in pay ( BAH ect..). Things couldn’t be better. Then we found out that she was pregnant and we were very excited. It was a happy time. There was some talk between her mother and her regarding whether or not she should terminate the pregnancy. I was not involved in those discussions, but I was able to convince my wife to have our baby despite her mother’s opinion. At this time I got called to go to Iraq. I would be gone for at least 6 months. I ended up doing 8 months in Iraq and had a few close calls in the war theater (See the movie “Sever Clear” to lean more. I am in this movie/documentary several times). I returned home just in time for the birth of my baby girl. It was a happy time indeed. My wife asked me to not reenlist and to get out of the military all together. So as I came up on my EAS I thought long and hard and made the choice to get out for the sake of my family. So I did.
We moved to a town in Texas where I would go to School on the GI Bill and she would work at a local pharmacy once our little girl was old enough to go to preschool. I started a degree in business, economics and finance and worked part time at a paint store. My wife mainly took care of our baby and did odd jobs for people around the town. She started growing distant and taking frequent trips to her mom’s and other family members during my second year of school. I had obligations at school and work and couldn’t go on most of the trips with them. Come to find out, she was seeing a guy who was a single dad with two kids. I did not find this out until after she left me. I came home from work one day to find everything had been cleaned out. Everything! Pots, pans, beds, cleaning supplies. Everything! Pictures were left behind by accident. She also took out the saving account. She took my 3 yo little girl and left me with nothing. Not even a pot to p~~~ in. I was ruined in my mind. It was awful. I had no idea what went wrong. I was shocked and could not believe that I could be betrayed by this woman who I loved and had a child with. It all came to light later on. Time has a way of revealing the truths that are all so inconvenient.
My mother was not happy with me at all. My father was livid and would hardly talk to me. They could not understand why their son could be going through a divorce AGAIN. In their minds it was obviously a problem with me. After all, who is the common denominator? That’s right, It is good ole me. So they wanted to make sure I knew how to treat woman and I had a long lecture at the age of 28. It turns out, I was doing what they taught me to do. I was providing for the family. I was offering love and emotional support all the time. I was leaving little love notes on the fridge. I would give my wife several breaks a day from the baby so she could clear her head and get away. I understood all this. I was doing what I was taught and quite frankly felt good about doing it. My wife was the one missing something. She spent her days watching feminist propaganda on daytime TV and I would hear about how men are s~~~ and women are gods all the time. I of course being the magina that I was, I would not dare disagree wholly. When she would start telling me about what she heard on Ellen or Oprah, sometimes I would say things like, “that is a bit extreme don’t you think?” That would always cause her to get p~~~y and I would always back down. Until one day I had enough. I told her that I thought she may be mentally ill. Her thought processes were always backwards and she had such a s~~~ty way of looking at people and situations that there must be something wrong with her brain. It was the only thing I could come up with as the problem. Certainly she wasn’t evil on purpose? Right? Well, that was it for her. When I came home from work the next day she was gone. After a few weeks, I filed for divorce. She still took me to the cleaners and I lost every round in the divorce proceedings. I lost everything, from custody to child support to geographic restrictions. I lost every round! This is when I promised myself that I will never marry again!
She got engaged to a low IQ dumbdumb who she was seeing while we were still married. ie the frequent trips ect… He was going to save my ex-wife from her ass hole ex. Right? Not quite. This guy had two kids so my little girl had a step sister and brother. My ex-wife was going to adopt these two kids as well. They ended up getting married a few months later. A year later, she filed for divorce. Interestingly enough she filed for divorce on the same day she was to adopt his two children. She left him high and dry as well. What a C~~~!
She went through several other men in the course of a few years. She would take my little girl on all her excursions across the western half of the country. She would go live with this guy then go live with that guy, then another. One day during a visit, my little girl tells me that a drive by shooting had occurred at her house and the bullet went through her bedroom wall. At this point, I was not a happy man. I knew that a little girl needs her mother but this was completely ridiculous. It turned out that my ex had shacked up with some thug who had a questionable past to say the least. I finally got fed up with the nomadic bulls~~~ as she was taking my little girl out of school and moving to another town every time she fell in love. I filed for full custody in 2011. $15,000 later I lost every round in the custody proceedings. The judge did not care about the drive by shooting or the nomadic lifestyle of my ex wife. Even though I was a hard working, well educated man with a good job and a veteran, I was told that my child will remain in the custodial custody of her mother and I was ordered to pay more child support. That was my first real dose of the red pill and it was very hard to swallow.
Shortly after, I became a disaster. I still thought something was wrong with me. I needed a woman. I needed companionship. But all these women are s~~~. What did I do…. I just started dating girls like crazy. As soon as I saw a major flaw in one of them, I would duck and run. It was exhausting. I finally stopped the madness when I moved for work. I liked the single life and made the most of it. My friends and family kept asking me when I was going to find someone and settle down. This brings me to the latest of the womaen in my life.I ended up landing a big job. I moved to the big city in Texas. I promised myself that I would not meet girls in bars and I would find a good place to meet nice girls in the city. One day, I was outside on the porch of my apartment and a girl walks by with her little chihuahua puppy. I said hi to her and never thought anything of it again as she was not all that attractive and she didn’t seem all that interested in me either. A few days later I saw her again and we hit it off. I started going over to her house every day after work. We would go eat and just hang out in her apartment. We talked about everything. Culture, work, music, politics etc.. I thought that I found a unicorn. Life was great. I asked her out and we had sex all the time. It was fun. I had her move in with a year later and that is where the trouble began.
I came home from work on night and she was not there. So I called her cell and no answer. I called several time a few hours later. Then she showed up slobbering drunk yelling at me. Telling me I have no right to call her as many times as I did. She threw some things and then stabbed my couch with a kitchen knife. There was a lot of yelling and screaming so I left as I was sure the police would be called. We both left for the night. When I came back she was there and she never said a word about what had happened. She acted as if everything was normal. I wanted to talk about it and she said she did not want to talk. Then she said she forgot the whole thing even happened. These kinds of events would happen for several years. We would have 90-100 days of peace and then she would have a drunken episode. Every time I tried to talk to her about the problem she would tell me she didn’t remember. This was frustrating because I wanted to make it work. It was hard for me to admit that she had a problem. It turns out she had a feminist friend and mother who would tell her how men are the evil beings on the planet and must be exterminated. I kid you not. She actually told me that during one of her drunken rages. I started recording them too. I kicked her out several times and she would always come back. Whether it was me feeling lonely and sorry for her or her just needing more money or a place to stay. When I moved away to Arizona, I thought it was over. We broke up, but she followed me here. She lived with me for the first year, Things were ok. She did not have a job and I told her that I would pay for her real estate exam and she could sell houses. She agreed and was excited. But the excitement shortly subsided when she realized it was a tough road. She told me just wanted to get a job in an office somewhere instead. I though ok, I just paid $4K fort this school but you can stop trying to sell houses if it makes you happy. What a mangina as was!
My little girl would visit every summer and she would treat her like garbage. I asked her not to drink in front of my little girl and she blatantly did it anyway. Telling me I am judgmental. She would get drunk and cause arguments right in front of her. All the while, I am trying to bring sanity to an insane human being.
She is still in my life but in a limited capacity. I cannot get rid of her completely because she threatens to blackmail me if I cut her off. So I am stuck paying for a few things of hers until further notice. I hope she finds a white night soon.
I have noticed similar traits in all women I have met. We can all tell that the arrogance and misandry are in full force into today’s culture. Most of these women have no clue that they are victims of the government and culture gone completely buttf~~~. I for one will not participate in the madness any longer.
Since I have made my choice to be MGTOW in September 2015, life has only gotten better. I thank you fellow MGTOW brothers for writing in the forums as they keep me pointed in the right direction.Cheers,
Liberty@lastTopic: Pain
Heya,
Before I start, let me begin by saying this won’t be lighthearted or funny. This is a form of therapy for me, a way to vent and find support. This is a story about a chapter in my life, a relationship I had with the mother of my child, and the family court process that I’m still fighting today. I’m fully aware of my own major f~~~-ups that you are about to read about. I hope you can read this entire post. Excuse my bad spelling and grammar, it will get worse as I write on.
I’m Jay, 27, father, laborer, bartender, student, truth seeker.
When I was younger, still a virgin and never kissed or done anything with a girl, I moved into a place with my best mate and his girlfriend. All was fine for a long time, until they started to fight. Disagreements turned into full blown shouting matches over things like overdue dvds.
Long story short, one day my best mate breaks it off with her, says she’s crazy and can’t deal with her anymore (first red flag). All 3 of us stay living in the same place, as we had all become very close, a mistake all 3 of us would soon come to regret.
Months pass, my best mate begins dating his current wife and father of his kids, and is as happy as Larry. His Ex is distraught, I see her crying and moping around everyday, sleeping too much etc etc. During that time, I consoled her, I was there for her. We would sit on the porch, drink and smoke together while she would cry and express regrets and mistakes about her relationship with my bro.
I felt so sad for her, usually a passionate happy fiery bubbly beautiful girl had been reduced to a pile of ashes while my bro seemed to move on so quickly and into dating.
We became close during this time, just as friends. But, my feelings for her started to shift at a certain time I can’t pinpoint. About 6 months after they had broken up, I was completely and totally head over heels in love with my best friends ex-girlfriend. Remember, I was still a virgin and totally inexperienced with woman at this point, she knew this all to well but she did not know I loved her.A group of other friends and I rented a cottage at a mountain village for the weekend to go to a concert. My best mate chose not to go because she was going.
I had no intentions to express my feelings toward her, my loyalty to my bro was much stronger then that. Anyway, we had copious amounts of alcohol, weed and ecstasy for the weekend.
On the night of the concert, we got plastered beforehand, took our E and off we went.
When we arrived, happily drunk and close to peaking, I said I was gonna go on the theme park rides and if anyone wanted to come. She decided to come with me. We laughed and chatted about random crap as we waited in the queue, buzzing off of the e. On the ride, she started to feel ill, she grabbed my hand and held it tight. I talked her through it, my heart racing.
When the ride stopped, we walked to the concert, it was extremely muddy and people were wasted and falling everywhere. At one point, a person fell into her, I caught her before she hit the ground and put her back to her feet. We looked at eachother and started kissing passionately and it felt like we had kissed before. This was my first real proper kiss.
We danced together, occasionally kissing.
When we got back to the place we rented, I rubbed one out and then settled in my bed alone and tried to sleep, of course getting nowhere. She came in and asked to talk, she questioned me about what happened, about what we would do about my bro (her ex) and I said we would tell him straight up. She asked what would happen between me and her, I said I didn’t know, she said she didn’t think that we would ever kiss again as I would be to scared because of my virginity and my bro, wanting to prove her wrong, I sat up and passionetly kissed her again. After the kiss, she said “you’re a dick” and ran away to her room. Nothing further happened that night.When we got back home from that trip, we told my bro that night what happened, he laughed and seemed fine with it, he said “yeah I thought you guys might have a thing”. He seemed completely ok with it, and gave us his blessing but nothing further happens between me and her for awhile, we were best friends me and her so it was a little awkward.
Time goes on, she and I slowly start to pursue our feelings for eachother, she doesn’t know that I’m in love with her yet, but she is returning my affections.
One night, we are talking in the living room the 3 of us, my bro is drunk, I say im tired and decide to go to bed. But really, I wanted to leave them alone to see what would happen, I listen through the thin walls to there conversation. My bro is trying to get her to come to bed with him, she sounds conflicted and hesitates to answer but eventually says “I think im just gonna go to jays room and talk”. She does so, we start talking and she offers me a back rub.
My bro becomes understandably furious, my bed is creeking because its crap, and he thinks we are having sex.
He starts walking up and down the hallway banging the walls and shouting, we get up.
My bro is drunk, but he is hurting, he see’s his virgin best mate and his crazy ex-gf who he apparently still has feelings for hooking up and it hurts him. Drama unfolds for the next couple weeks, which includes me being punched which I took on the chin and purposly didn’t fight back, them two having sex behind my back and her trying to get my mate to lie to me about it saying it never happened, that must have hurt him. But we are good friends and he tells me the next morning. I felt heart broken, but I didn’t show it. I should have seen this second red flag. I was blind, I loved her.
Long story short, my bro moves out and continues to date his current wife, he gives us another blessing before moving out.
Her and I pursue a bf gf relationship.My bro and I are no longer best friends but are still good friends and we still talk from time to time. I understand I broke the bro code and betrayed his trust. He understands he gave his blessing when he didn’t mean it and how badly I wanted to be touched by a woman. He is supportive of me and not her in my current situation.
For months after that, things are heavenly. She and I writhe in bed with one another, me trying to lose my virginity and her trying to save it for a special time. The sexual tension is immense. One time, after yet another long foreplay, mr stroodle finds its way into the poontang pie, despite my complete inexperience, I last a good long time and give a bloody good performance. During this, my very first time in her heat she blurts out “cum in me”, which is the 3rd red flag. I don’t, I control myself and blow on her. My cherry is popped. Days after this, I tell her I love her and for how long ive loved her, she says “yeah I think I love you too” (bulls~~~).
Just weeks after this, we are driving home from a friends party, she randomly says out of nowhere “jared I think we should break up”, my heart slumps down and ask her why, she doesn’t give an answer and later that night retracts and apologizes for that statement. Odd but great things happen, like me waking in the night to her giving me a blowjob, then jumping on when she thinks im about to cum (4th red flag, she wants my seed).
We make plans to move to Australia so I can make more money and spend some time with my estranged father. We do so, and suddenly we are in a new country living with my father who I hardly know, this is when cracks really start to show. We both know noone over there.In Aussie, I am working hard, I would come home and smoke to much weed and play to much video games. We talk of having a child.
This goes on for awhile and she has had enough, this is when she began to physically and verbally abuse me. I impregnate her. She decides after that she wants to move back to New Zealand while I work and save for our child in Australia, we start a long term relationship, I work hard and all seems ok.
She comes back over for a couple months during her pregnancy to be with me, my behavior of smoking weed and playing video games doesn’t change. We fight all the time and at one point she bloodies me with her celphone (red flag).
We go to find out the gender of our child, she doesn’t want to know, I do. She leaves the room and the doc tells me I’m going to have a baby girl. I ring and tell my mother the good news, this makes my partner go into a fit of rage, jealous that my mother knows the news before she did. She hits me (red flag) and shortly after, leaves back to New Zealand, I stay to work. I save up and buy her a car, I struggle with my relationship with my father, but thats a story for another time and I end up wasting money on weed, computer parts and video games.The 9th month of pregnancy comes. I move back to New Zealand and start working as a Milk Merchandiser, a job I hated from start to finish. Her and I are fighting constantly and the relationship has turned toxic. She starts to say things that mess with my head (red flag), she uses her pregnancy as victim mode which turns people around us against me. I start to resent her.
My daughter is born, natural home birth, 45 minute labor. One of my proudest moments in life and one of the only times I was truly proud of my partner and her inner strength.
We have a newborn and I hate my job and resent my partner, the strain on me is to much and the inbalance in our relationship is not fair. I cope with smoking to much weed, playing to much video games and spending to much time at my friends place down the road. She tells me everything thats going wrong is my fault and I agree.
I quit my job and go for a failed 2 week stint in a stupid rediculous christian rehab (im not religious).It’s worth noting that her brothers grow weed fulltime. She would encourage me to go work for them to earn money and weed, she would come over and help us prune from time to time. She would smoke weed herself on occasion, but she always preferred her drink. She always encouraged me to smoke “in a more balanced way” rather then constantly.
Time goes on, our relationship gets worse and worse, I become depressed, I stay unemployed for over a year. I become convinced im a useless piece of s~~~. I try my best for my daughter, but am totally depressed. I smoke far too much weed and play far too much video games to cope. We both now deeply resent eachother, we stop having sex and I become nocturnal. Friends and family try to get me to break up with her, but I love her to much and am blind to the red flags and feel stagnant in a cirle of pain and love.
At one point, during an arguement in bed, she is verbally abusing me again, I turn around and punch her on her hip. The only time ive ever hit a woman. She had a big bruise there the next day. I apologized for it and she apologized for her provocation. I must admit, I wanted her to know what it felt like to be hit by someone you love, considering how often she would hit me. Assuming she ever did really love me.
Our relationship draws to its final close. My birthday comes around and her brothers shout me a night on the town which includes copious amount of alcohol, gambling strippers, weed and at the end of the night, a brothel.
I cheat on her, we all cheat on our girlfriends that night. An act that I regret to this day, I loved her but at that point, we were done anyway. Hooker was my 2nd ever woman Id slept with.
After an arguement about a month after I cheated, I blurt out that I had been with a hooker. I start crying and say im sorry. She sits there for a moment and then says “oh yeah well **** has a bigger c~~~!” referring to her ex bf my mate from above. Who know’s if its true or not but it hurt like hell. She pieces things together, and figures out her brothers were cheating on there gf’s also, fallout. I lose her brothers as friends.Our relationship officially ends, we cling to eachother for a little while, and I come to visit our daughter as often as she will let me, but she starts using breastfeeding and control games to inhibit my time with my baby.
She starts dating some new guy, they go on a date and I babysit, she tells me she had some form of sexual interaction with him but i dont want the details. She has sex with me that very same night. I’m disgusted in myself. My heart is breaking badly, but im not letting it out.Around this time, she manipulates me into signing a parenting order by saying “ill never get back with you unless you sign this”. I do so, the parenting order seems ok. But theres one line in there that she pushed to its fullest extent. I reads “contact can only be made through pre arrangement”. Well how can pre arrangement be made if she doesn’t communicate?
I became badly depressed, more depressed then ive ever been. She is being difficult with letting me see my daughter and it hurts. I smoke weed to cope, but its not helping, the weed is making me worse.
I go to her place, I try to reconcile, she rejects me.I leave her place that day, my heart is broken and im full of regret, her hurtful words ringing through my head, issues with my father pop up. Issues of feeling weak, useless, pathetic, negative self talk etc etc.
I make my decision, Im going to kill myself, I tell noone. I start up my car, I dont put on my seatbelt. I smash myself into a power pole at 120kms. I knock the powerpole over, the car is totalled. The airbag deploys I emerge with only bruises to my rips and knees, I was very lucky.
I’m fully aware how selfish that was of me being a father, I know, trust me I know. Ive spent countless hours kicking myself for this fact. Nobody can punish me harder then I punish myself.So.. I spend a couple of weeks in the looney bin, a couple of days after my crash Im still wanting to finish the job, but the staff and nurses are amazing, and the sedation is effective. I calm down after a week.
Im released from the looney bin and my path to true healing begins. My ex partner refuses to communicate and offers me only supervised contact at a supervised contact center with my daughter.
For a time, I refuse as I believed I don’t need to be supervised with my daughter as I would never hurt her. But I can see her logic nowadays. After awhile, I just want to see my baby, so begrudgingly I accept supervised contact as it is my only option.So I take her to court to vary the parenting order. Still in love with her, I stupidly make my affidavit totally passive and make it only about contact arrangements for my daughter. I stupidly tell the truth about all the mistakes ive made written here.
She replies all guns blazing, she attacks me about everything and uses my own pain against me, she lies through her teeth.
She tells the truth about:
*my depression
*my unemployment
*my issues with my father
*my cheating on herShe lies about:
*drugs and alcohol and having zero tolerance toward it during our relationship
*my ability to parent and her never leaving me alone with my daughter
*her family and there issues (her mother has schizophrenia)
*her own abuse and violence toward me
*my one violent punch to her hip
*my issues with my mother and how that relates to her (weird)
*her issues with my mother
*my mother not caring about her grandaughter (my daughter)
*a fight that she herself instigated with a friend
*my suicide attempt
*a friendly drunken playfight/brawl I had with a friend
*something im forgettingNow, interestingly enough. She submitted her own mental health history to the court. She has in the past been diagnosed with Acute Psychotic Disorder, Egocentricity and Grandiosity. This was a huge revelation to me, and explained her anger, outbursts, selfishness and irrationality. Also, upon talking with her a couple of her ex-bf’s to figure out wat the f~~~, it all became clear, I was dealing with a highly manipulative, totally insecure, highly damaged cold hearted actress the entire time, this was great closure for me.
Ok, so these days. I’m still in court fighting to vary the same parenting order. I’ve stopped smoking weed and have passed my first hair follicle drug test, I have another coming up soon. I work and go to the gym. I’m studying addiction and mental health studies as I eventually want to become a suicide prevention councellor. I’m doing a parenting course to improve my chances of success in court. I’m seeing a councellor who just happens to be a beautiful woman. I practice mindfulness regularly and am eating healthy. I’m still in supervised contact with my daughter as there is no other way around it currently, but it will change soon.
My lawyer and I are crafting and compiling all of this stuff to help my case, my lawyer is confident in being able to prove my ex’s lies for the judge.
My daughter is still being raised by my ex who is the day to day caregiver, and this worries me bigtime. If you have read my entire story, you will know why. But really though, my daughter seems to be progressing just fine, in fact the supervised contact center tells me she is advanced for her age, which makes me very proud. My ex has always been a good mother at least when she’s not stressed.My experience with the New Zealand family court is one of extreme bias toward the mother. They have continually ignored my ex’s evidenced issues and focus entirely on me and it’s incredibly and unfair, not only for me, but for my daughter.
If you have gotten this far and read the entire thing, I applaud you. You might be thinking im some sort of crazy. I can promise you im perfectly sane, I have been in love with a deeply disturbed woman who seems to have deep issues with men and it has profoundly effected me, im stronger for it.
Take it with a grain of salt, this is therapeutic for me and somewhat of a vent and it would be great to hear some opinions of these traumatic experiences in my life. It would be great to hear that im not alone from other men.
I’m a kindhearted, gentle, sensitive, compassionate bloke who wears his heart on his sleeve and loves his daughter very much. I apologize if its a bit long winded.Thankyou for your time,
Jay
Woman are collectivly no longer our opposite in polarity, This is a huge problem.
Anonymous
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