QUESTION: Bachelorhood, MGTOW and Loneliness

[MOWsince95Participant 1446]

I am surrounded by people, noise, rudeness, etc all day at work. Same when I go to the store, or out to eat or whatever.

When I get home I not only want to be alone, I most definitely NEED to be alone. I have a nice home, awesome piece of land, views of wilderness for miles, animals, no one passing judgement or telling me how to live, how to look, how to spend my time or what intellectual interests or hobbies to pursue. I am far happier and more at ease in my own mind and space than I ever have been in when living with or going steady with any woman and suffering their constant interference in my activities.

And I very rarely feel any desire to socialize with people in a society that craps on my personal values of self-reliance and personal liberty.

If you are MGTOW when you are young you have no heart.
If you're not MGTOW when you are 20 you have no brain.

[AttonParticipant]

There are a great many things that are worse than loneliness, pandering to women is an example. I could never live with bending the knee on a daily basis to some piece of s~~~ overgrown child with a victim complex. I could never spend my life walking on egg shells so that I don’t offend some special snowflake.
If the consequence is loneliness for not pandering, then I dare say freedom is a sweeter fruit than the affections of whores and panderers.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[Anonymous 11]

Etrangere wrote:

I was the narcissist , I was the one who was selfish.

Interesting, that’s exactly what narcissists do. Project!!!

[EtrangereParticipant 706]

Interesting, that’s exactly what narcissists do. Project!!!

Yeah CP , she was a real piece of work , and did a number on my noodle as far as I let her , because some of that is on me. I told her to f~~~ off in the very beginning and never should have wavered from that stance. It took me awhile to get here , but my eyes are wide open now. Internet dating produces some real winners I suppose.

[TaxGuyParticipant]

I guess the first question is really, why are you alone? Some men are introverts. Some have been burned by a woman or women and won’t go back. Some are actually lonely within a relationship. And thousands of other reasons.

Then comes the question of if you are lonely. I suspect that most men figure out a way to not be lonely if they don’t want to be alone at any given time.

It’s women that think alone=lonely. Men know that those two words have different meanings. But a woman alone with her thoughts will drive herself mad. I never really completely figured out why, but my assumption is that they hate themselves. And if you hate yourself, why should I love you? You know you better than I do, and you can’t stand to be with you. What makes you think that I will?

Also, a man will make an active move to get out and do something. A woman is more likely to be passive, just sit and stair at the TV and bitch on social media about how lonely she is. When I don’t want to be alone, I grab my keys and go somewhere that people are. Pretty simple solution.

Order the good wine

[Anonymous 11]

Etrangere wrote:

Internet dating produces some real winners I suppose.

I’ve read that personality disordered people are more likely to use internet dating. Any woman that is HB-3 or higher on an Internet dating site is there for a reason. Her orbiters know something that we random Internet saps know not.

I’ve also read that whack jobs are more enticed to enter psychological related fields. That being said, there is some value to be gleaned from a social science such as psychology. Caveat emptor applies though.

TaxGuy wrote:

It’s women that think alone=lonely

So true, a long term female friend of mine is entrapped in a relationship with a narcissist. He has beaten her down pretty badly. She is still an AWALT and cannot exist w/o him.

She had to flee her home last night as he was in a violent rage which I learned about through my grapevine 3 hours prior before she called to tell me that she was sleeping in her car in a parking lot to escape him. I ordered her to leave her car in the parking lot, and I went over and picked up from there. This is a crime ridden urban area so that was not exactly a wise place for her to stay.

She spent the night on my couch. I dropped her off back at her car this morning. She once let me stay at her place when I was dealing with a man who threatened to burn my house down so I was returning the favor.

[RoyDalParticipant]

An old friend imparted this bit of wisdom: “I can be alone without being lonely.”

The converse is true too. I have been very lonely in the middle of a lively social gathering.

I prefer the former to the latter.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[Anonymous 42]

Etrangere wrote:

she was a real piece of work , and did a number on my noodle as far as I let her , because some of that is on me. I told her to f~~~ off in the very beginning and never should have wavered from that stance.

@C-Pimp, Your X psychologist wife held a degree in psychological male lobotomy! Her mental scalpel would dull almost immediately on my head! The Irish cannot be psychologically analyzed, it’s impossible!

Anonymous wrote:

I’ve also read that whack jobs are more enticed to enter psychological related fields.

C-Pig, they’re trained in gynocentric universities where the modern psychology has it’s narrative firmly set by female persuasions!

Psychotropic Ritalin for boys, “all men are pigs”, slogans that depicted men as vile creatures, drugs that worked like horse tranquilizers for boys, they really do believe we’re foul creatures, all this s~~~ is from the delusional thoughts multiplied and amplified in their heads from years of feminist clucking that men are no good.

You’ll NEVER hear me recommending a man seek or accept advice or guidance from ANY WOMAN! It’s like a mouse seeking a massage from a boa constrictor!

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

Which is worse? To be alone or be trapped in a relationship with someone who won’t return your love.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[Anonymous 11]

@Tower: You know they would have had us pumped so full of Ritalin our eyes would have been crossed.

Has anyone ever see a child on Ritalin? They are like zombies with this blank stare.

[JollyMisanthropeParticipant 3356]

It’s lonelier being in a sea of people and not a single one of them acknowledging your existence than it is actually being all by yourself.

I feel more “alone” walking through a shopping mall than I do at my house.

The Children of Doom... Doom's Children. They told my lord the way to the Mountain of Power. They told him to throw down his sword and return to the Earth... Ha! Time enough for the Earth in the grave.

[Soldier-MedicParticipant 2566]

I enjoy my own company and have far too many projects under way to be lonely.

Why smart people are better off with fewer friends

Once concept could be that I believe that many of the men here are of above average intelligence. More intelligent people tend to need or want friendships less.

I realize that I am inferring that I am a smart person here and it can be an egotistical thing to say. I wonder what the corollary would be if you were to test IQ vs. those going MGTOW.

"I asked you a question. I didn't ask you to repeat what the voices in you head are telling you" ~ Me. ........Yes I'm still angry.

[Masculine_ManParticipant 2735]

Tim Patten wrote:

I am working on a new article and asking for members help. Please understand that your feedback may be used in this article. I will post the DRAFT of the story here before going into final editing.
———————

Bachelorhood, MGTOW and Loneliness
The idea of living alone frightens most people and MGTOW is often criticized for being a life of loneliness, but these are stereotypes. Bachelor’s in modern society often have the most active and wholesome romantic relationships available.

Ideas a feedback?

I would actually like to see a cost benefit analysis of what this is truly worth. The percentage of a marriage ending in divorce is great. At the end of that road you will be alone again. Is it better to take the chance to have a companion only to lose it all and be alone again? Except this time you will have less than you did before. You will live worse than you lived before. It will also be probably you will have newer obligations than before. The benefits are great for women but for guys I do not see it. Just my thoughts. In other words, I’d rather be alone and not broke than married which could mean risking it all. It’s just not worth it.

Another way to look at this is from an investment perspective. Would anyone risk it all on one thing that might work?? Of course not, show me a person who would put all their eggs in one basket and I’ll show you a person who will lose it all. Unfortunately there is no other way to diversify in marriage. In fact I do not take women out for any meals anymore. What do I get out of it? I have platonic friends that pay and vice versa but I put them in the friends zone.

If it costs you your peace of mind, then it is too expensive.

[WhackerGuy2030Participant 999]

You don’t need to address loneliness in MGTOW guys. You need to address it in men in relationships. Does anybody know a married man that has maintained all his pre-marriage friends and hobbies? The married guys in my world are the most lonely and miserable people of anyone I know.

[Anonymous 42]

Soldier-Medic wrote:

I enjoy my own company and have far too many projects under way to be lonely.

@Soldier med, That reminded me of 1st night in Boston 1991, I was on a double date with my friend, his girlfriend, and her girlfriend, it was a blind date. At the club I saw her (my date) mingling with perfect strangers and kissed a perfect stranger in a liplock, she wasn’t paying any attention to me (100 miles away from where I lived) so I walked away from our table and asked a single chick to dance and we did, I stayed at her table and talked with her friends until midnight, I went back to my table to check on when we were leaving, At the stroke of midnight my date approached to kiss me on the lips, I turned my head at the last second and she got my cheek instead. I purposely did that to rub salt simultaneously into a wound, an ego wound.

I think this story just about accurately depicts the dating game, the reason I left our table in the first place is because sh couldn’t stop talking about herself-ish. She was a total narcissistic bitch I wasn’t going to allow to ruin my night.
By the time we left Boston I wouldn’t even talk to her.

[Zuberi TauParticipant 10606]

Long time bachelor.
Loneliness means nothing to me because it’s better to be happier by yourself than miserable with someone else.
Most trash bags can’t grasp this fact so their response is “You’re going to die alone?”

I usually respond with “What the f~~~ do you care?”

[sidecarParticipant 35837]

Being a bachelor simply means you don’t make commitments to women (because women aren’t worth committing to). That’s all it means. It has nothing whatsoever to do with being lonely. That’s just an assumption, mis-definition, or outright lie created by women who want bachelors to make foolish commitments and become chumps for them.

It’s spinsters who get lonely. There’s a reason why the lonely cat lady with her box wine stereotype exists.

The loneliest men I know are all married. They never get to see any of their old friends. They aren’t in any clubs. They aren’t allowed any real hobbies. All they ever get to do is go to work to earn a paycheck for wifey, come home to watch whatever wifey wants to watch on the television, and sleep in a sexless bed. Then get up and repeat until death or divorce.

That’s lonely. Who the f~~~ would want that?

[EtrangereParticipant 706]

So true, a long term female friend of mine is entrapped in a relationship with a narcissist. He has beaten her down pretty badly. She is still an AWALT and cannot exist w/o him.

She had to flee her home last night as he was in a violent rage which I learned about through my grapevine 3 hours prior before she called to tell me that she was sleeping in her car in a parking lot to escape him. I ordered her to leave her car in the parking lot, and I went over and picked up from there. This is a crime ridden urban area so that was not exactly a wise place for her to stay.

She spent the night on my couch. I dropped her off back at her car this morning. She once let me stay at her place when I was dealing with a man who threatened to burn my house down so I was returning the favor.

that’s really f~~~ed up CP , I think you did the right thing bro.

@C-Pimp, Your X psychologist wife held a degree in psychological male lobotomy! Her mental scalpel would dull almost immediately on my head! The Irish cannot be psychologically analyzed, it’s impossible!

I hear you…at this point she can shove her mental scalpel up her ass because now I’m free.

[Anonymous 2]

We are living in the information age.You can connect with people without any problems. You can have hobbies ( I am a hamradio guy also a martial artist and I love cooking.) Meaning you can join a group with a similar interest,so you going to interact with people. Going regularly to those group’s meetings it will give you a certain sense of belonging and might turn into a fantastic opportunity to keep you away from feeling lonely and depressed . Join a gym and learn about a healthy life style. With better diet after your work out you will feel better,stronger,and happier. You can save up money to travel to some places. First maybe some not that far, rather easy to reach places and later when you become an experienced traveller perhaps some more distant exotic locations. As you saving your money, search the net about those locations,it will keep you interested and your life become more exiting and enjoyable. Those travel experiences will make your life more richer. If you like pets, get one. I love dogs,a good dog are just an awesome company! You have to learn the appreciation of the ” I do it when I want it, a way I want it, If I want it ” life style. Leaving alone means you are free and in your personal life you don’t have to put up with any s~~~ from anybody !! Interactions with women? You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to,but if you do it might do it in a “proper 007” style. Make it passionate but short and after move on till the next opportunity coming up. It is work for me. Try to have a positive attitude about your life much as you can regardless the circumstances even if it is very hard at the beginning. And when you do it you will realise that you are having an awesome happy life and you will never ever give it away to work on the plantations again. Look after yourself brother because you are awesome and you are worth it ! MGTOW forever!!

[AFTParticipant 2722]

Hi Tim, you have titled your post as a question and then given 3 statements. I understand the insinuation towards a culturally accepted view of solitary isolation as being lonely, and it probably is, and how bachelorhood and MGTOW are conflated and put into that basket for ease and simplicity.
Firstly the framework from which we perceive things is the answer, because the difference between a positive connotation compared to a negative insinuation is merely a subjective perception.
The positive perception to solitude where privacy, reclusiveness, peace and quiet, are clearly assets to a peaceful life with a quiet and sane mind are in stark contrast to the isolation, emptiness and confinement of loneliness. So what’s the difference? Merely perception, the gap between an external stimulus and our reaction to it. The reason why some people see the same obstacle as a challenge while others see it as a problem, it is the choice we all make between positive and negative.

It’s the desire for that which eludes us that causes the most pain. Stop desiring that NAWALT unicorn and it’s power over you is erased. The marriage contract has been corrupted, because while we are happy to facilitate their free spirited sexual freedom with pump and dump, we are not stupid enough to then turn around and obligate ourselves with the burden of being responsible for an over entitled whore.

Bachelorhood is simply the state of being unmarried for a man, where this is a temporary state for the common man that aspires to get married, it has pragmatically become the safest and undisputed optimal state for any intelligent and aware man.
MGTOW is simply the pragmatic common sense logical reason and understanding that a man will nearly always be better off not marrying and almost certainly worse off marrying.
Loneliness only enters into the script if your perception is predisposed to it, and you are not otherwise fulfilled, busy and happy. There are plenty of depressed, unfulfilled married men, just as there are single men and women depressed and unfulfilled.

When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

[Author]

Posts