The seductiive power of hate

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

I posted this as an answer on the thread “I hate Women” and it was suggested to me (privately) that I should share this as a separate post since the topic is very important to MGTOW brothers going through the red-pill rage stage. So here it is, I hope it helps (don’t bother asking me about the “group” involved because I will not discuss it):

That is a key question, and deserves analysis. My brothers above have done a pretty good job but let me add my two cents because I understand anger, hatred and the desire for revenge. In my younger days I was a slave to these impulses but no longer—I freed myself. It was very hard but can be done.

When I was a teenager and young man I spent several years as a member of a organization (which I will leave nameless) that actively promoted hatred and revenge. It was central to their philosophy. I think I was attracted to this group because I was an outsider to the mainstream, I felt unwanted, marginalized, different, not one of the “crowd”. I used to get ostracized, beat up the usual fate of the unpopular. As a result I was a very angry person and this group appeals to the angry, to the outsider and they offered acceptance, comradeship, and the promise of revenge against all comers—and anyone not one of us was an enemy.

Unfortunately I did many “questionable things” during those years and I will not insult your intelligence with silly excuses like I was just following instructions. The fact is I did those things and I’m sure the day will come when I will be held to account by the Creator.

So how did I free myself from the downward spiral of anger, hate and revenge? It wasn’t easy. Our leader told us once that it was our hate that made us powerful, and enabled us to do things we would not normally be able to do. He was right to a point. But I had the self awareness to step back and evaluate my behavior. Yes revenge actualized through violence can be intoxicating; in fact it is like a drug…but you need more and more to feel the “fix”.

I discovered that hate and revenge became the end in itself. It overwhelms and squelches the philosophy or purpose that created it in the first place. It became hate/revenge for its own sake. You can see this same dynamic in the world—terrorists, North Korea Iran etc. Whatever cause long ago initiated their anger has in most cases in a practical sense disappeared and is no longer a catalyst in any practical sense—but the hate and anger goes on because again it has become and end in itself.

Using the power of reason you can logic out the solution. These emotions and urges are seductive, but they are also ultimately self destructive. Once you have annihilated all of your enemies what then? I thank God I reasoned this out. It was clear to me that if I remained in that group and an apostate of their philosophy I would ultimately end up one of three ways:
a) killed by someone
b) in prison
c) killed myself

Interestingly when I quit the leader didn’t try to stop me or talk me out of leaving. He just chuckled and told me “once you put that uniform on–it never comes off”. For many years I didn’t understand that. Then years later some member of the group came looking for me (internal issues in this group are “settled” in this way). I knew this would happen sooner or later. So I prepared myself mentally and physically to take care of business—and then I understood what the leader meant. I was still on the hook, still playing the game.

It was hard but I chose not to “take care of business”. I confronted my adversary directly and told him I understood why he sought me out and what I was prepared to do. Back in those days I was pretty formidable which is why they sent their best guy to deal with me. But fortunately he was no fool and left. Since then I have worked very hard to recognize and resist the urges that are plaguing you.

You can get over this, you can use your mind and reason to reject these urges and repudiate their control over you. Claim your life, don’t give it over to something that has as its purpose ultimately your own destruction. Giving into hate and revenge is just slow motion suicide.

[Anonymous 54]

Theres your intro right there.

Welcome Pistol Pete!!!

[AwakenedParticipant 35200]

Hatred takes Energy, and Focus AWAY from Yourself and is Wasted on the person you’re hating whereas Apathy neither takes away Energy or Self-Focus.

Apathy Equates to No F~~~s Given !!

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[MGTOW_MikeParticipant 6253]

Pistol Pete,

Such an excellent and valuable post on this website. The topic of anger. It is a VERY common phase that we red pill swallowers have gone/will go through. My experience with anger started after taking the red pill and realising that was a point of no return. I use to get so angry and agitated whilst driving on the road when I saw other people driving poorly. I use to get triggered so easily and it use to burn inside my mind.

Fast forward to today, I have improved a lot better. I realised that anger roots from a deep denial of an underlying issue. It reminds my of one of Spetsnaz’s videos where he mentions that anger is like an outcry towards another person/people/society to acknowledge our pain. We want other people to say “sorry” to us so we can feel validated and treated like a human being. Unfortunately, this world is not ideal so we need to muster up our strength to start forgiving ourselves for feeling such anger, after which we start forgiving others who have wronged us or treated us like trash. This has nothing to do with self defeat or being submissive to ill treatment. It is about allowing yourself to fully move on. I have one MGTOW friend whom I admitted to him bluntly that I have been through anger issues and he is very receptive and non-judgemental of it.

1.) Acknowledge that there is anger (this is not a weakness to admit to yourself and to your close MGTOW brothers)
2.) Forgive yourself for feeling such a way
3.) Forgive others who have hurt you or deceived you and wish for their well being
4.) Take up an awesome hobby
5.) Have a balance in life (which I admit I must take action)

A tranquil mind is neither happy nor sad, it is uninfluenced by external conditions.

[Anonymous 25]

I’ve used mindfulness meditation with great success for stuff like this.

The following recordings are very good (I have them on cd but just managed to find them on youtube):

series 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HYLyuJZKno
series 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oq-9POHygas
Series 3: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=524RMtfHKz8

For red pill rage I’d recommend doing the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) which is series 1, for 8 weeks. You do the first recording (body scan for the first two weeks). The second two weeks to alternate day with recording 1 (bodyscan) and then recording 2. Then following two weeks to recording one alternate days with recording 3. Then last two weeks do recording 1 (bodyscan) with recording 4). It takes about 45 mins a day listening to the recording.

That will give you a good grounding in the technique. Then I’d recommend doing series 3 (the recording on loving kindness) and watch that red pill rage melt away.

There’s lots of proper scientific research to back up that mindfulness is very helpful for stuff like that and good for your brain and general wellbeing.

Just what’s worked for me. Hopefully it will help some of you other men.

[MarketWatcherParticipant]

Going my own way has saved me a lot of trouble. I was on the path to becoming a SJW, but not on the “popular” side. Then I went my own way. Why? Because it does not matter what others do, I cannot save or destroy them all, so the effort is futile. What I can do is control my own actions and protect my sovereignty. My mind is now resting easy. Great topic PP glad you got out of the “group”.

[MGTOW KnightParticipant 7477]

Just to give y’all brothers here some insight. I think there is a pill more bitter than the red pill itself. This pill is LIFE. Life is the most bitter pill we all have to swallow at some point. Life isn’t equitable and it has no propensity for being FAIR

Before I was adopted, I used to be consumed by HATE. My biological mother was a despicable human being that abused me and my sisters. I have scars on my face that are physical reminders of the s~~~ storm that was my childhood. This is something that will never leave me.

When I was in foster care, the rage engulfed every facet of my being. I would fight kids just to feel anything. The hate festered to the point that I was nothing more than mere a hollow shell. I wanted love, but there was none to be found. Just emptiness. The hate was so intoxicating that I was on the verge of destruction, and on the very precipice of suicide. What I wanted was an apology for all the harm my mother caused me and my sisters, but that “I’m sorry” just never came.

As you can imagine this had detrimental impacts on my psyche, and I was embittered for many years.

It wasn’t until I realized that my hatred was only harming me, that I finally learned to forgive my mother and myself. It dawned on me that she wasn’t losing any sleep over losing us, so why must I? My biological mother is mentally warped, and there is nothing that can change that. This was my first bitter pill I ever took.

I came to the conclusion, that I can only change my direction in life.

If I had let the hate win, I wouldn’t be here today. I would certainly be dead.

Linked is the story of my fruition, and I will eventually finish this story to demonstrate how I discovered MGTOW. Feel free to read them if you wish. I think it depicts what hatred creates…

/forums/topic/the-story-of-my-fruition-part-1/.

Story of My Fruition: Part 2

Fuck bitches... literally and metaphorically

[Anonymous 14]

Hey Pete, great post. I do know you have a soft spot for Israel so that is why you left them out of your example, but I feel they should be right in there with DPRK and Iran when considering those who are using past wrongdoings to justify current ones. (actually the DPRK has done nothing wrong yet, and I feel they are being overly demonized) S~~~, even the U.S. is clearly involved in terrorism to some extent. Nobody’s hands are clean in war.

Other than that, incredible post, and I completely agree when you say to the effect that you need to logic your way out of it. I have never been a hateful person, but I do understand that it effects everyone universally, and even someone who may seem the most evil and insane to you may have some very good reasons to have gone down whatever road they are on, even when it is clearly the wrong one.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Machiavelli’s introspective meditation advice is very good indeed and I wish I had access to it long ago. I wasn’t that lucky back then. One of the events that caused my introspection was a good deal more dramatic. One of my “associates” was found dead one morning, draped across the body of another dead guy. I was informed of this by a local police LT. (At the time I was working toward and AA degree in Criminal Justice, so I had classes with many law enforcement folks that I knew personally from dealing with them on the streets. No I wasn’t trying to become a cop by getting the degree, Ironically I figured knowing/being trained/ the same as a cop would give me the edge as in any “questionable activities” I might be engaged in)

Anyway the LT was laughing about it. He had many dealings with us over a space of years and made it clear he hated us–so one of dying was really good news to him and he really enjoyed rubbing my face it since the guy was one of the members of the unit I was in command of. He told me that my associate was kneeling over his victim, stabbing him repeatedly and on one of the strokes he missed and stabbed himself in the leg severing the artery. Evidently in his frenzy to kill his opponent this went unnoticed until he passed out from blood loss, and collapsed on top of the other guy. No this was not political; this was a personal grudge and believe it or not it was over a woman—big surprise.

So the LT expressed how he was looking forward to the day that I end up on a slab with a ID note on my toe. The lesson was not lost on me. Yes I was an ignorant street thug, but not stupid. Ignorance can be fixed and I was trying to do so. Thus the lesson of this event was not lost on me—particularly when the very next weekend after the Friday night meeting I and some of my guys were in a black neighborhood confront some guys who were Black Panthers. Let me tell you they were always armed with shot-guns and not afraid to use them. Of course they DID use a light bird shot load to ensure they didn’t kill anyone thus involving the police but it did cause some severe injuries. I reasoned it was only a question of time before the LT got his wish. (there was also an internal struggle for leadership at the time and guys were choosing up sides; I knew where that would end up.)

So yes meditation would have been preferable to the events above.

[Anonymous 54]

MGtow Knight. I also bear the scars of a mothers “love”
Red pills taken early.

[MGTOW KnightParticipant 7477]

Anonymous wrote:

MGtow Knight. I also bear the scars of a mothers “love”
Red pills taken early.

Yeah I got to see firsthand how much “love” women have to offer. I guess this has allowed me to pull back the veil of female mysticism from a early age.

Fuck bitches... literally and metaphorically

[Anonymous 54]

Thanks for tellin that Pete.

Some may not realize, but extracting your self from a group like that(?) can basicly be a death wish.

Along with the impessive Spiritual growth, is the sheer guts it took to leave.

Damn Pete.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

RE: MGTOW knight: I know what you mean. I was born in Germany but at a year old my natural mother gave me up for adoption—guess I was inconvenient. My foster parents sucked in many ways but they id raise me. I’ve contacted my natural mother in Germany twice. She has ignored both of my attempts. I came very close to boarding a plane, going there and…But I realized it was the uniform again trying to lure me back to the old ways of taking care of business. So I opted out and just live it.

[MGTOW_MikeParticipant 6253]

MGTOW Knight,

Let me start of by saying thank-you brother for sharing your story. Your story will most likely help at least one man from suicide, who has gone through what you have gone through. I look forward to listening to your story and learning something from it. As I have said many times on many other threads, I am so grateful to be a part of this brotherhood. A brotherhood of compassion and understanding.

A tranquil mind is neither happy nor sad, it is uninfluenced by external conditions.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Anonymous wrote:

Some may not realize, but extracting your self from a group like that(?) can basically be a death wish.

True, since I was an officer, my disaffection was not tolerable; I also had the misfortune of choosing the losing side in the internal struggle. I knew they would come folks seeking revenge/payback can be very patient. When he did I knew he wasn’t alone. Taking on someone outside is very different from taking on a fellow member because we know the rules. I think what ended it peacefully was the fact we both realized the other was trying to lure into a safe location for the same reason. So they knew I wouldn’t take the bait and the fact I was baiting him/them for the same reason indicated I didn’t buy his lets be friends story and was preparing to deal with them as they would have dealt with me. So he/they left. (I say they because to carry out the assigned task is never left to just one guy–not for efficiency sake but rather to provide fuel for potential blackmailing later.)

[MGTOW KnightParticipant 7477]

PistolPete wrote:

I’ve contacted my natural mother in Germany twice. She has ignored both of my attempts. I came very close to boarding a plane, going there and…But I realized it was the uniform again trying to lure me back to the old ways of taking care of business. So I opted out and just live it.

Man Pete I feel you brother. Dude she isn’t worthy of the title MOTHER. I had to learn this lesson myself. My biological parents aren’t my parents. Being called my MOM and DAD is something to be earned, not handed out like some participation trophy. My biological parents don’t owe me anything and vice versa. I’ve accepted that fact. Frankly I don’t have any desire to go back and see them.

Once you go through something of this magnitude, a whimsical women is just trivial. I know that my past made me strong, and I honestly know I can face anything else life can throw my way.

I was raked by the coals with the flames searing my flesh, but I prevailed through the hell. There isn’t anything else life can throw at me that can destroy me.

Fuck bitches... literally and metaphorically

[MGTOW KnightParticipant 7477]

MGTOW_Mike wrote:

Let me start of by saying thank-you brother for sharing your story. Your story will most likely help at least one man from suicide, who has gone through what you have gone through. I look forward to listening to your story and learning something from it. As I have said many times on many other threads, I am so grateful to be a part of this brotherhood. A brotherhood of compassion and understanding.

I’m glad I can help one lost brother out there. God I know the feeling. It breaks my heart to hear when another man gives up. There is always a reason to keep persevering. If my story can save 1 life, then I have fulfilled my duty.

Honestly, Thank God for MGTOW!

Fuck bitches... literally and metaphorically

[MGTOW_MikeParticipant 6253]

MGTOW Knight,

I read both parts to your story, and man…..that is truly f*cked up. I take my hat off to you, for your boundless courage to keep on moving forwards and being a loving and caring brother to your two sisters. I will remember this story for the rest of my life. The torment and anguish from being moved from one environment to another during your childhood is beyond imagination. To always having to be “on your toes” and dreading what is coming next……my head hurts even thinking about it. All you ever wanted was to be with your family and happy, nothing more. I read the last line of part 2, and it just crushed my heart to realise that your dream was taken away from you, just as things were getting better.

Here I am thinking I have “problems”…your story disintegrates my “problems”. I think I will put that rope down and let the grim reaper take me in my old age.

A tranquil mind is neither happy nor sad, it is uninfluenced by external conditions.

[MGTOW KnightParticipant 7477]

MGTOW_Mike wrote:

Here I am thinking I have “problems”…your story disintegrates my “problems”. I think I will put that rope down and let the grim reaper take me in my old age.

Its all good friend. Thanks for reading. We are all troubled, living in a world of trouble. Some poor soul always has it way worse. Just keep that in mind before you do anything too drastic.

I’m honestly blessed, and I know that there is someone going through much, much worse.

Fuck bitches... literally and metaphorically

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

RE: MGTOW Knight. You’re a survivor brother. You’ve been through the crucible, no one does so untouched but you’ve gained in wisdom far more than you suffered in the struggle. God bless you.

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