Need the advice of my MGTOW Brothers

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

I don’t often ask for advice but now I need it. For the sake of simplicity I will arrange this like a legal brief….three parts: Facts, Issue, Argument.

FACTS:
37 years ago I met a girl in college. I spent the next decade suffering from “oneitis”. Naturally she treated me like crap because I was also suffering from sever White-knightsim. I moved away. Even though she rejected me as a suitor she would write me letters/and I would respond (no not romance letters–just s~~~ about the weather etc.)

One day after ten years I drove 900 miles for a visit. She was still living at home. Her mom died years before. Her dad was on disability–she had held only one job–with the Post office—briefly like three months. So the two of them were living hand-to-mouth. The house was falling apart, they had no car etc. She gave me her sister’s address because her sister lived a short 2 1/2 hours from me.

When I got home I contacted her sister and let her know the situation—she was delighted that I was willing to help, and invited me down to her house for a visit. I went and hit it off with her husband and her two kids. For the next five years, since I had no family I would travel to their house for the Holidays and stay with them a week or so. We had a blast. Then about ten years ago her Her father finally died, and he sister was literally destitute. The brother-in law and I drove up to where she lived to deliver a car and computer and help her out with groceries etc. Of course upon seeing me her first word were: I haven’t changed how I feel about you…fine whatever.

At that point upon return home I stopped writing back to her. Now I still would visit the family for the holidays, and more kids were added–5 total then the wife–her sister, stopped sleeping with her husband. Sometimes the whole family would come and stay with me for a week. In other words we were close–or so I thought.

5 years ago the wife told me her sister (who was now living in some trailer park and working some part time job) was lonely. So I started writing again BUT I was RED pill now so you can imagine how my letters read. After two years–and never an answer her sister asked me to stop writing. Shortly after I notice a different “vib” when I was there. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it but something was different.

Then two years ago they moved to another house; on the insistence of the wife. Only about 30 minutes form the old house BUT no longer out in the woods but a house in a neighborhood (sic) hive. It was six months before they even gave me the new address. And I have never been invited back.

This last September the oldest boy was registering for a college 50 miles away from where I live and 4 hours from the parents place. The husband calls me up and asks if I want to meet them for lunch or something while they are there. I said sure its a short haul for me. 10 minutes later I get another call from him in which he stated his wife didn’t think meeting me was a good idea. I was never given an adequate reason why other than “we don’t think we have time to meet you for lunch”. Really–you’re going to eat at some point aren’t you? “Well we don’t know exactly where we will be on campus” Your son has an appointment somewhere doesn’t he? Lets meet there. No no my wife doesn’t want to.

I was pretty p~~~ed off about this and told him in an E-mail there was an addiction problem in the family–she was addicted to controlling him and he was addicted to seeking her approval at ever turn.

I hear nothing further from them except the oldest boy who E-mails me Thanksgiving day. I hear nothing during the holiday. Two weeks ago I E-mailed the boy and asked about Christmas–no reply. I E-mail again last week asking if he got the other message—again no reply. Tonight I get a message on my phone from the dad—not inviting me, or explaining the cold shoulder since September but rather he wanted to tell me to get the kids gift cards for Christmas.

ISSUE: What should I do here?

ARGUMENT: Clearly the sister has turned the wife against me–and has been doing so for some time. (Her sister is a lonely, vindictive c~~~ loser who detested hearing about the fun activities that I and the family shared.) And because the wife rules the roost and the husband is a mega-mangina he has raised no meaningful objection to how I’ve been treated. Now I love the kids very much and obviously I’ve known them for 18+ years. But I’m sure the mother has instructed them notto converse with me directly–which is why the boy hasn’t responded, and I use to Skype with the oldest daughter but now I find her account is blocked.

My first impression is that I’m simply being used without them giving any thought to how I’ve been treated–but I hate the idea of the kids paying the price. Of course I’m sorely tempted to travel the 1300 miles to West Chi-town and pay a little visit to the sister but frankly I’m afraid of what I might do so that is out.

So there it is my brothers–I’m open to whether or not I have interpreted the facts correctly AND suggestions about how I should handle this? Right now I’m so angry I can barely type so forgive the typos and spelling.

[AwakenedParticipant 35201]

Only provide the kids the gift cards, if you can be sure the kids get the cards, AND the kids will know that the cards came from YOU !!!

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[Jeremiah JohnsonParticipant 2219]

Pete, holy crap sir…They have taken a mega s~~~ on you…And here you are still trying so very hard to have a place in your heart for their offspring…Granted the children really have had nothing to do with any of it until now, and seemingly, from what you have described, they are taking advice from the gash mother…I would cut off all ties INCLUDING gift getting for the kiddies, until a truth filled, and empathetic apology was issued by both the MANGINA and the Controlling Gash Mother….As for the sister, forget about it, these creatures only become more hate filled, drama creating, and deceitful….No way I would go near her in email, snail mail, phone call or anything else ever again, no matter what…You have done everything you possibly can for this entire family, and this is the thanks you are greeted with??? Nah, BULLS~~~…You deserve so much better than any of this, I would put all of this in entirety, into the very subconscious back bin of your mind, and allow it to breathe there, until the above stated apology is given and of course, IF YOU SHOULD EVEN DECIDE TO ACCEPT IT….Again, it hurts you inside to have to forget about the children that you have watched grow up, and had enjoyed, shared, and watched them become the young adults they are now…I understand that pain brother, I surely do, but it is not at all worth giving anything else away in such an neglected and decaying relationship as you have here…In the future, if things can be repaired at all, there will be other B-days, other X-mas times, and what not….It is on them now sir, You have done all you can, and do not deserve to be thrown out into the cold by such people…You are better than this sir….But that is of course Pete, just my two pennies sir…

Men are at a time when panning for gold in a urinal has a higher probability of success than finding a faithful and loving woman, it is time to go your own way.....

[Staying_Free_MGTOWSpectator 13]

Didn’t even have to read all that s~~~ you know what to do

Stay Free, Stay Safe, Stay MGTOW!!!!!!

[Jan SobieskiParticipant 28791]

With respect Brother.

What is the first thing they teach in law school?

It isn’t personal. If you get angry you lose your logic. F~~~ your feels. What does your logic tell you?

If this was a client how would you advise them? Under pain of malpractice, for the win?

If that was me and you were my attorney what would you have me do?

That’s what you should do.

Love is just alimony waiting to happen. Visit mgtow.com.

[FrostByteParticipant 19005]

If no one in this is family, I would let go. The boy will contact you when they are older. I think you triple your chances of something happening with 3 people who might be vindictive towards you.

If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.

[HitmanParticipant]

i hate to tell you,
but the good heart that God gave you is being used against you.
the kids aren’t yours and yet you are concerned.
keep in mind that the wife instructed him to write what he did.
she will keep you at arms length and use you when she wants to..knowing you are attached to the kids.
.
tough one, but i would just write them a card,
no gift cards.
people love you for who you are,
NOT for what you can do for them.
.
i would cut all contact,
however you may want to keep in touch.
keep in mind you have been used and the wife controls the husband in this dysfunctional family..
a card is enough, no gifts.
………tough love MGTOW style brother ..sorry..

[MattNYCParticipant 2329]

That woman’s a piece of s~~~. The others are killing themselves by allowing her to stay in their lives.

Best guess: Sister feels rejected that you didn’t swoop in & white-knight for her, paying off her bills, etc. She tells other chick that you promised her money, but didn’t deliver, so you’re scum.

Second best guess: Sister feels rejected that you didn’t swoop in & white-knight for her, paying off her bills, etc. She tells other chick that you hit/raped her, so you’re scum.

Either way, she’s taking out your “rejection” of her on the sister/husband/kids. It’s s~~~ty, and this tells me all i need to know about this piece of trash.

Husband’s probably a lost cause. Kids, meh, they might see through the bulls~~~. If you really want a relationship w/the kids they need to reciprocate, coming out from auntie’s thumb. Send them another email that says something like “If you want to know the truth, contact me. If not, take care.”

Don’t send them gifts. The mother/sister just wants free cash & will force the kids to hand it over.

[Mr. ManParticipant 2916]

Sigh. This is a sad story. Such a long-term friendship flushed over some woman’s irrational feels.

Staying_Free_MGTOW said it best: “…you know what to do.”

[Greg HondaParticipant 6406]

What the other guys said ^^

It’s hard when you have a big heart but:

Sometimes you just have to know when to cut your losses and walk away

It's Time to get Wise

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Thank you brothers, I knew you wouldn’t let me down. You guys are the one bright spot in this sordid mess. Thank you for talking some sense back into me.

JJ and Jan in particular you guys are right. Looking at this objectively the conclusion is obvious. I’ve had a giant s~~~ taken on me and consistent with the blue-pill outlook of the husband I’m just supposed to swallow my pride, have my emotions manipulated and be turned into a useful if disposable tool.

Well that is over. Like it or not—no f~~~s given.

[bladeParticipant]

After the gift card bit that would be the final straw . Turn and walk you are getting used . There’s no respect been shown to you and from reading what i read they are taking advantage of your kindness . Just how mgtow men don’t need woman we don’t need to be treated like s~~~ by anyone to .

THE PLANTATION HAS NOW TURNED INTO THE KILLING FIELDS . WOMAN ARE NOW ROLLING CAMBODIAN STYLE .

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

I’m in a similar situation with family, my sister’s children that I was close too. Sister turned old family friends against us, etc.

My recommendation to me was to do nothing.

I am doing nothing. I and my 5 brothers know nothing and are doing nothing.

As I told my brothers, nothing good will come of something because our sister will be involved.

It is hard but you can’t have a relationship with the children.

So the answer is to do nothing brother.

Peace brothers

[Anonymous 42]

You need to put some scorched earth between yourself and them, manginas are just as toxic as any man handling c~~~!

I’d have several thousand sq miles of Hiroshima between myself and that situation, you’re just asking for heathache and headache otherwise.

I’d nuke it, every sq. inch of it!

[experiencedParticipant]

Sorry about your situation man. “Give them nothing.”

Men are simultaneously disrespected and admired by women.
“What a strong Arab charger that horse is. Look at its capacity. It should run on the outside of the turn in the old Ben Hur movie. It’s awesome.

We are all “Its” to women.

"It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Again thanks to everyone–advice will be acted upon—Plug pulled Stealthy.

This site is a Damn LIFE-SAVER!

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Are with others who said “you know what to do”.

This part p~~~ed me off……

PistolPete wrote:

his wife didn’t think meeting me was a good idea.

PistolPete wrote:

I was never given an adequate reason why

I have seen & heard that type of c~~~ing comment before too. And there doesn’t need to be a “reason why” because women don’t “reason”. Anything but reason is making that declaration and you can either ignore it, or call her out and FORCE an answer out of her – preferably in front of others.

“Why is meeting me “not a good idea”???”

MAKE her say it out loud.

This way, when anyone asks why nobody will receive anything from you for Christmas, you can tell them “I don’t think it’s a good idea”. You won’t need to say another word.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

I’m much less p~~~ed off today than yesterday and this is due to the serious reality check you guys gave me. I’m at peace with unplugging!

Just wait–one day the mangina husband will join us—the wife hasn’t f~~~ed him in 7 years and I know for a fact she IS f~~~ing one of the neighbors. So sooner or later he will join us.

[Writing Desk RavenParticipant 460]

I know I’m late to the party here, but just remember, Pete: God may have called us to forgive, but forgiveness is not acceptance, understanding is not agreement, and turning the other cheek is not inviting more betrayal.

You’re doing the right thing by walking away — just be careful you aren’t carrying them with you. I don’t have any delusions that it’s a burden you can magically set down overnight, either; just unpack what you can as you go and leave it where it falls. And you’ve got brothers and friends just a PM away for those times you may well need someone to smack it clean out of your hands (to spare you in spite of you, as it were), too.

The best you can do is take a step back and we’ll have to pray the husband and their eldest son realize their implicit participation in rejecting the brotherhood and mentorship that’s respectively been set before them on a silver platter. And the greatest revenge is not ours to have, but there will be no small or bitter amount of justice for you in welcoming them back to wisdom and reality with open arms.

And even without knowing for certain that she’s a slut (I had my suspicions from the initial story), I’m with you in a certainty that they’re going to wake up soon, whether they like it or not.

"Almost the main work of life is to come out of our selves, out of the little dark prison we are all born in... The danger is that of coming to love the prison." ~ C.S. Lewis

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

Many thanks WDR, I have faith in the eventual outcome! And I hope to be the first to welcome him here. But whenever he finally takes the red pill—the experience is going to be tough for him.

[Author]

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