I still miss her

[TicParticipant 4329]

also,

I was truly in love in my last relationship. I did things that only a man in love tolerates and does. She left me like it’s nothing. To me, she is dead. I go on and it feels like there’s a small void in my heart. But, it’s fine. We define our lives by our actions. I’m a better person for it and it’s how I found this place.

Good luck. You will be FINE.

God bless peace and freedom.

[Prefer Peace to PieceParticipant 10809]

Swimcat-
I’m sorry for your loss.
It is difficult being a widower, particularly during the Holidays. At least you have family.

I tell my friends- the one thing you have to do is forget the things which are behind you and reach for the things which are before you.
This is actually in the Bible (see below).
You were lucky. It sounds like you spent time with a good woman. If that is what you want, find another one. But please forget the past and grab the future with both hands. Good luck.

Philippians 3:13King James Version (KJV)

13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

[SwimcatParticipant 3597]

I am excited about my youngest daughter coming home tomorrow. She’ll be on a military flight from Europe and I’ll pick her up in the morning.

Thanks Keymaster, you guys have made me feel better tonight. And yes, I was a very lucky man to have had a good long term marriage.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Swimcat wrote:

I was a very lucky man to have had a good long term marriage.

Funny. The rest of the planet is still trying to convince men “a good long term marriage” is common.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 5]

Life isn’t fair.
Most of us never get to spend one moment with a real unicorn.
You spent about 40 years of your life with one, living the dream that we all wanted to live.

Take some time out of your little pity party and throw us some of that sympathy please.
And for f~~~’s sake don’t go looking for some social media hamster to fill the void you keep digging because then you’ll really have something to get depressed about.

[Anonymous 11]

I’m sorry for your loss man. Always think of the good times you had with her whenever you get down.

To address the widower issue from the point of a professional single man, you are a hunted man. Yes, the dating scene is truly f~~~ing twisted vicious as mentioned before. The women generally are basically flat out unmarriageable material these days plus never leave out the legal bias against you. Any mistakes on your part will be costly. Really focus your efforts on making sure you do not fall into a NAWALT trance.

You are vulnerable, and they know it.

[AwakenedParticipant 35203]

Very Sorry for your loss….

It’s a sad situation that you had one of the few good ones, but at least you have experienced which many/most men have NEVER experienced, and never will. ENJOY, and CELEBRATE the memories while you begin to build a new life for YOU !!

In a World of Justin Beibers Be a Johnny Cash

[Anonymous 0]

Swimcat wrote:

For those of you who don’t know me I became widowed in October 2015. Now as Christmas is here I miss her more than ever. Last year it had only been a few weeks and I was still in shock, but now its been over a year and I’ve come to the realization that I liked my old life better. I was comfortable being married. I’d been married all my adult life, and I still feel somewhat lost. My kids are coming over for dinner tomorrow and we’ll all go to midnight mass same as always. We’ll go to my daughters on Sunday to open gifts and have dinner, but its just not the same as when she was living.

DEC 26, 2007, 6:21 AM for me. And yes, I will go to my grave saying that I got the last unicorn. There was a website, widownet.org that I found helpful. Started dating in 2009 only to find that available women were all psycho-babes. Haven’t dated since 2011. I guess what I’m fumbling around, trying to say is that your life does continue but I still get dangerously depressed around Xmas and find that cutting myself off from all the sentimental stuff and saying alone is the best I can do.
It does get easier over time but you never forget. Try widower and let me know what you think.

Enjoy The Decline wrote:

I am real sorry for your loss, but if you are actually one of the fortunate ones who only had good experiences with a girl, I am wondering why are you here? Like a lot of us actually seen the ugly side of feminism which basically brought us here.

I can help with that question. Only dated for two years, three years after she passed. I was divorced once and widowed once and have experienced the very worst and the very best that women have to offer. Look up my intro “Peace at Last”. It’s buried pretty deep in “Introduction”. I am very grateful to be here because I can talk to real men with real experiences. It has helped more than I can say.

[Truthseeker82Participant 6406]

Loosing someone you love is the ultimate pain. If sharing the pain with your brothers here helps – go for it. You clearly had a rare breed of woman – at least in today’s modern world.
I sincerely hope you find some inner peace this season. I believe love never dies and what you shared with your wife will always be with you. Peace to you.

[Eric LauderParticipant 12043]

Enjoy The Decline wrote:

Swimcat wrote:

For those of you who don’t know me I became widowed in October 2015. Now as Christmas is here I miss her more than ever. Last year it had only been a few weeks and I was still in shock, but now its been over a year and I’ve come to the realization that I liked my old life better. I was comfortable being married. I’d been married all my adult life, and I still feel somewhat lost. My kids are coming over for dinner tomorrow and we’ll all go to midnight mass same as always. We’ll go to my daughters on Sunday to open gifts and have dinner, but its just not the same as when she was living.

I am real sorry for your loss, but if you are actually one of the fortunate ones who only had good experiences with a girl, I am wondering why are you here? Like a lot of us actually seen the ugly side of feminism which basically brought us here.

He’s here because after the loss he realized that the world around him have drastically changed, and the idea of risking with a woman under such new conditions scare him.
I can relate to that, because my ex-wife didn’t divorce raped me, I’m still quite well off, she took about 30% of my properties, I still have about 70%. I don’t pay alimonies, just only support for the kids.

During the summer 2014 I have see the “yes-means-yes” law passed in California and, way worse, Convention of Istanbul in Europe – check my signature. Those are LAWS, it’s not the rants of some crazy landwhale with blue hairs. In my country it passed AT UNANIMITY.
Since 2013 in Italy there are incentives for hiring women, and since then more women are hired than men.
Those incentives are not going to be eliminated, EVER: as long as there will be less working women than working men, there will be such incentives. And there will be always more working men than working women, because while there are plenty men who are ready to support a stay-at-home woman, there’s no such thing as a woman who is ready to marry a man without a job.

Proof – check here:

http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/interactives/marriage-market/

Click on “number of employed women for 100 men”, check the table, then click it again, and check the table again.
Can you notice it?
Where there are few men for 100 women then women work, but where there are many men for 100 women, there’s the record of women not working.
Female nature: when they have choice, their choice is always economically exploiting men.

SUPREME LEADER KIM JONG-UN'S FASHION STYLIST - if you want a new look or if you're a very beautiful trans you can call me, phone number +85079255312 / mobile 01921421211. The worth of a man isn't the usefulness that women get from him. Avoiding living with a woman, a man isn't rejecting a lot of sex: he's rejecting sexual starvation. MGTOW IS TACKLING DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN COMPLIANCE WITH CONVENTION OF ISTANBUL: http://www.coe.int/en/web/conventions/full-list/-/conventions/rms/090000168008482e --- Article 4, Section 4 "Special measures that are necessary to prevent and protect women from gender-based violence shall not be considered discrimination under the terms of this Convention". WHAT I LEARNT FROM A GENDER STUDIES CLASS IN LUND, SWEDEN: every time feminists accuses men of doing something, odds are likely either them or persons associated with them are doing the exact same thing but a lot worse. WHO I'M RIGHT NOW https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1okpAj7Fhw Basically my former life have been a conflict between this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yz_RQVkvke4 and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dFIMeyTK-sU That's, more or less, all about me.

[Rolling Tin FistParticipant 484]

Swimcat wrote:

For those of you who don’t know me I became widowed in October 2015. Now as Christmas is here I miss her more than ever. Last year it had only been a few weeks and I was still in shock, but now its been over a year and I’ve come to the realization that I liked my old life better. I was comfortable being married. I’d been married all my adult life, and I still feel somewhat lost.

Thank you for your courage in posting. It’s tough to loose someone who’s life, spirit, and soul has intertwined with yours. For good or/and for ill, she becomes the standard by which all other women thereafter will be judged.

I feel the same way as the woman that I thought would be my wife (we were engaged) when I was much younger. Something happened to her that I was only vaguely cognizant of, and one day the person I knew, loved, wanted to have a family with and spent the rest of my life with was gone.

It takes time. One day at a day. You will find a path to healing and reconciliation and understanding of it all. The pain won’t be ? % gone, but it will be something you eventually have the tools to manage. Peace.

"Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another" - H. L. Mencken

[SheNoheartParticipant 144]

my friend, life is tough, my daughter was kidnapped by her mother right from the very arms I carried her and she took off to another country and she was only 3 months old. My first born baby…
One thing I learned during my situation is be a good friend to your mind and you will see your mind will be friends with you. Guide yourself and don’t let others guide you.

[Greg HondaParticipant 6406]

I hear what you’re saying. I’m also a widower, soon to be 3 years in.

In my experience I found that the first year is devestating. I had no interest in life and no direction or positive hopes for the future. Didn’t care about anything as everything seemed worthless and pointless. I was lucky I had a full time job with good office banter and that made the days ok. At the weekend I would work non stop fixing my run down house. Always busy, less time to reflect on morbid thoughts.

The seccond year I started to see a lttle light at the end of the tunnel. Real life just doesn’t let you wallow around doing nothing. There are bills to pay, cars to fix, stuff that needs doing. Half way through the seccond year I gave internet dating a go. The entitlement of women on POF indirectly led me to MGTOW. I quickly realised that the available women my age were not worth the effort and could never compare to my departed wife.

Now in the third year I still think of my wife everyday, but I’m ok with it now. It helps if you have some spiritual beliefs as you know they are in a better place, having fun, and checking on you every now and then. To any newly widdowed guys out there I would strongly advise Not to make any Important life decisions during the first year You are not thinking straight and could sign up to something you will bitterly regret 2 years later.

It gets easier as time goes by. You need at least two years to start dealing with emotions and regrets before you can get on an even keel. If you really loved someone then I’m sorry, but you will never fully get over their death. However, as time goes by it will get easier to deal with and eventually you will be at peace with yourself. You will still think of them everyday but it won’t devastate your mood as it did in the first year.

Life goes on.

It's Time to get Wise

[Anonymous 1]

my partner of 23 years passed away last July and I didn’t regret a day we were together. Life becomes very difficult especially after 10 years as two people start to grow into a single mindset, so having to become a single independent person after such a long time is a struggle. I also I feel your pain every day, that weird feeling that you have forgotten something when wake up then you remember and your mind tries figure out how her voice and memories can be in your head but she is not there physically. The best way to look at this is if you were dying and your partner was to survive what would you want her to do. Now that is exactly what she wants you to do. So live life to the maximum and fill it full of adventures and experiences in her memory.

PS I’m in Brisbane this Christmas (live in Sydney) visiting my parents. I’m off for a ride tomorrow with their neighbor as he loves motorbikes just like me. This is what she would want me to do, be happy and enjoy life.

[Anonymous 22]

Sorry for your loss. I’ve never lost anyone that is that close to me but I can just imagine (or try to imagine) what it would feel like.

She’s in a better place. We will all go there someday.

Merry Christmas to you!

[Author]

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