CPig's Stupid Female Request of the Day.

[OldBillParticipant]

I’ve two younger sisters and our father passed away before either married. That meant I was tapped to walk both down the aisle. Shudder…

With the first I was adamant that I was not to be involved in all the usual horses~~~. I’d walk her down the aisle but I would not be part of the wedding party. Of course that idea didn’t work out.

First, instead of wearing my own suit, I had to rent a tux which matched the groom’s men. Then, when one of the groom’s men fell ill, guess who was the stupid f~~~ who had to fill in for him in the pictures? That naturally meant I couldn’t sit with the relatives I planned on sitting with and had to sit with the wedding party.

Game, set, and match to my sister and mother who, if they didn’t actively plan it, expertly used my desire not to make a scene into manipulating me into doing exactly what I said I wouldn’t.

And I missed out on the open bar too. An open bar I was paying for I should add. They’d decided to have an open bar to lure the guests to the reception while the wedding party went off for photos and I suddenly was part of that party.

F~~~.

When the second wedding came around, I made sure I would only be involved at a minimal level. Fortunately, my second sister wanted a less involved ceremony and walking her down the aisle was all she wanted me to do.

Despite that, my advice to all my brothers here is to stay away from weddings if at all practicable.

One final anecdote, I once helped a cousin “escape” from his pending wedding. With one week to go, he confided in me that it was all a mistake but he couldn’t seem to get out of it. Thanks to my frequent flier miles, I shipped him off to another cousin several states away while taking all the heat. It helped that my family didn’t quite like his fiance and that her family wasn’t particularly enthralled with my cousin either. The women and manginas screamed for a bit while the older men took it all in stride.

The stupid f~~~ eventually married another woman a few years later and is now divorced.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[Anonymous 42]

Hey C-Pig, after the last disaster (wedding) I stood up in front of my whole immediate family and swore of weddings for good! He’s was the lad I mentioned that’s now divorce raped with 2 buns fresh out of her slutty cheating baby basket.

I hammered everyone HARD with my tirade that day! Me stealthy? I don’t think so, I was like tank tearing through a toy factory!

[AFTParticipant 2726]

I don’t want to be a bad influence, but I sort of can’t resist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzi3pXUpuEU

ENJOY

When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

[Frank V.Participant 2445]

@keymaster : I was horrified to read it at first, reaching for a shot of whiskey to settle my nerves at the horror. But, as I read, I realized that it made sense. Sometimes it is better to just give them a push off the cliff instead of begging them not to jump.

@hitman : Last wedding I went to had an open bar and a really snazzy buffet. I knew the caterer as well as the couple, so I went for the food and booze.

I have never taken part in a wedding as a real participant. Honestly, it takes all my retrain to not scream “Run for it !” when they ask if there are any objections.

No I will not be trying catch her garter. Nor will I be usher or anything else.

Well, like I said before, if you got a great buffet from a Russian caterer and an open bar, I’ll come along.

Frank V.

[VarunParticipant 2981]

sidecar wrote:

There’s only one thing you need ask yourself when it comes to attending a wedding or not: Will there be an open bar?

I agree. “Living according to his own best interests” as our motto goes; I would participate only if there is something for me in it. The only reason I stil like weddings is because of the food. Awesome food! I don’t drink and neither is public drinking popular in India; moreover you’re lucky when its a wedding in the family because you get a lot of extended families helping your family; so if you go ” *pant* *pant* I’ve been working non-stop for the past few days (lie)! Can I get the break?” the other people, as sentimental as they are, wil go “Ooo, poor little boy! Leave everything to us, go upstairs and get some rest!” <- I’ve successfully used this tactic in 3 weddings; and gonna use it in the future too.

I enjoy the sights, ignore the plights, stay away from the tightly packed horde, stay out of sight most of the time; always get a share of the sweets and the awesome food..ahh.. the food! Such amazing expensive delicacies absolutey free of cost! Its almost impossible to hate weddings for these perks if you ask me, provided I’m not the one getting married off.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

[Anonymous 42]

AFT wrote:

I don’t want to be a bad influence, but I sort of can’t resist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzi3pXUpuEU

ENJOY

Hey ATF, THAT’S THE WAY TO GO TO A WEDDING! Thanks for giving me a new HERO SUPER HERO! I wanna be like Mikey!

[Anonymous 11]

Unfortunately, it’s on the Protestant side of the family plus he’s from a very devout Southern Baptist family so no open bar hence my hidden flask.

Asking a MGTOW to assist in planning a wedding is like expecting a chimp to fix your car.

This niece is both a starving artist and feminist who lives in some crazy artist commune so there is no budget. I’m wondering why this moron wants to even marry her. I’ll probably just call her oldest sister who loves organizing things and pawn it off on her.

I’d rather go to a funeral. At least the deceased will no longer suffer.

@meister: My sister-in-law is notorious for crazy requests so I’m f~~~ed either way. She’ll come up with another one no matter what I do or not do.

@Key: Ouch, though you’re more than restored your MGTOW credibility 10,000 fold.

[RockmaninoffParticipant 1641]

I still like the “offer to arrange an appointment down at city hall” thing. If they complained, it’d be they who are the ungrateful ones, not you.

". . . elle, suivant l’usage des femmes et des chats qui ne viennent pas quand on les appelle et qui viennent quand on ne les appelle pas, s’arrêta devant moi et m’adressa la parole"—Prosper Mérimée

[XSDBSParticipant 3598]

hmskl’d wrote:

I was usher at two weddings in my life with most recent about ten years ago; I still have occasional reoccurring nightmares. I know exactly why I’m still suffering a form of ptsd from my Cousin’s wedding … it’s just difficult to explain in a brief paragraph. It was one hundred degrees in the shade and the Aunt of the bride walked up to us three ushers and started yelling at us for seating some of her relatives in wrong spot. The bride was openly crying up until the ceremony began because something she claimed she wanted for the ceremony hadn’t been done. Something about the gazeebo. The brides father was an auctioneer and was walking around the grounds with his wooden round handled auctioneer cattle cane and swinging it in all directions giving us orders like we were his employees. The poor minister was standing in his robe with us in the hot sun waiting for the ceremony to begin and was actually dripping sweat from his brow. At the rehearsal dinner I was sitting at center of table and when they passed food from both ends all I got was empty bowls. They actually had to take my plate into kitchen and find me some left overs. When the ushers and groomsmen went to pick up tuxedos we drove in two vehicles, one car was mine .. it was road construction for many miles to tuxedo store so we had to drive on large course gravel roads and also fresh tar the rest of the way. I had a room booked at a motel. When I got there a mixup had taken my room. There were no other motel room available anywhere in town so I ended up with a converted storage room in the motel with a fold down wall mounted bed. This was the room where all the employees went to smoke so everything smelled. It had an old tv in the corner that didn’t even work.

It could have been way worse…
You could have been the groom!

[RedpillPrimateParticipant 1026]

I don’t even know how blue pill men stomach weddings…

Anonymous wrote:

AFT wrote:

I don’t want to be a bad influence, but I sort of can’t resist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzi3pXUpuEU

ENJOY

Hey ATF, THAT’S THE WAY TO GO TO A WEDDING! Thanks for giving me a new HERO SUPER HERO! I wanna be like Mikey!

I second that!

If I went to a wedding, I’d be like him! Especially if I were at the food bar!

[KnxGuy MGYParticipant 19]

good thing i will only have this problem with my youngest brother… blue pilled to the core, cant live without a female their helping him to breathe…

even then, i will say ‘get f~~~ed’ if he or his parasite approaches me about slavery ceremonies.

now the middle brother. He’s MGTOW like me. i saved one family member, my job is done. (im the eldest) MGTOW at 21 still MGTOW at 25.

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