Was St. Joseph a mangina (Jesus's worldly father)

[BestoftherestParticipant 285]

(Terribly blasphemous, Religious trigger warning!)

We all now the story of Jesus and how Mary never had sex with anyone. With the red pill and seeing how women act today its not to far fetched to think my version of events is true.

Joseph comes back to is village after months of constructing some far off building. As he enters the village everyone seems to avoid him. One of his friends approaches him and says “Mary is pregnant! You need to straighten out your home!”

Joseph is p~~~ed and rushes home. He demands to know how marry got pregnant. Mary knows there is no way out, but lucky for her she’s had time to make a story. Like most women Mary will never admit she did any wrong, even if caught with evidence in her belly, so she cried. She cried for hours. When she ceases to cry she approaches Joseph, a now emotionally softened man, and tells him how much she loves him. She would never cheat and she hasn’t. Joseph laughs.

Mary says “I know you have no reason to believe me, but I was visited by God. He told me I had a baby now! We need to raise him because he is a child of our lord! If you shun me you will shunning God, you will go to hell, and burn an eternity for allowing God’s child to go fatherless! Your a real man and real men don’t do that.”

Joseph is taken back, she makes a grand claim but the claim is so grand it must be true “Mary I’m a real man, and I believe god gave you a child. No one would lie about such a thing. I will raise the child as my own and we’ll be a family!”

No one in the village is convinced and throws an adulterer out and the idiot that believes her.

St. Joseph, the first documented mangina. Immortalized as a man saving a woman from her own cheating ways.

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."
Abraham Lincoln

[IGMOW (I Go My Own Way)Participant 2572]

One of the early slurs thrown at the Christian Church was Jesus is the product of a Roman soldier knocking up Mary.  So, I will need to reread what you wrote regarding that joke, and see if a 4th passing by it, I can find anything of value.

Actually, if you want to go back to something further in the Bible, God is said to have told a prophet to marry a prostitute:

http://www.gotquestions.org/Hosea-marry-prostitute.html

Yes, Hosea, and that is before Jesus.

"I am my own thang. Any questions?" - Davis S Pumpkins.

[BiG_WeaselParticipant 116]

No, I don’t see this as blasphemous.  I see it as a misunderstanding of the Gospel by the OP.  Joseph was told by God via an angel that this was the Messiah.  I think he saw this as an honor.

Matthew 1:10

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