So…I admit I had a Blue Pill backslide on the weekend.

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

Well, after a week and a bit of no sex and being p~~~ed off at my partner, I totally caved and went in for the sex after she started getting physical with me.  I’ll admit getting laid was great, but I realize it’s all part of her endgame of having kids and keeping me reeled in…sometimes hard to resist the other head down below that doesn’t think things over so well.

I have T minus 9 months to extract myself from the relationship with my assets intact before we are legally commonlaw at the 3 year cohabitating limit?  We’ve been living together in a co-owned mortgage house for just over 2 years.

Let’s say I want an extraction plan, I thought I would get her to sign a cohabitating agreement, or maybe a prenuptual that specifically outlines what pre-relationship assets I’m bringing to the table.  I’m guessing after she signs, but before the 3 year commonlaw date, I can then GTFO with assets relatively intact?

I would have enough money to compensate her for what equity she’s put into our house.  Or we could sell and she gets paid for what she put in (which has all been tracked by e-transfers from seperate accounts).  Would we have to split equity 50-50, or would I be able to get exactly what I put in, which is about 2/3 compared to her.

 

[MOWsince95Participant 1446]

Your jointly owned house is likely a lost cause – at least to the extent that you have over 50% in it.  In your case I would be more concerned that no sale occurs prior to 3 years, but that you may still be on the hook to pay 50% or more of the mortgage, but forbidden to live there.  Your best bet in the case of the home is to kill the relationship WELL PRIOR to the 3 year mark and get that place on the market.

Now, if you choose to stick it out to 3 years plus, here is the likely outcome: your chunk of that house will no longer be yours.  It will be given to her. You stated elsewhere she seems to never have money, so anticipate losing that should it come to court.  Also, since she never has money, you will likely be on the hook for some form of alimony or support payments at least for a time so she can f~~~ dudes in the home you will be paying for.

If your only major asset is that home, your answer is above.  GTFO before that 3 years or expect to kiss it good all bye.  If you have assets associated with your ID number so that they can be traced, these will be targets in 9 months.  Bank accounts? … start pulling cash NOW regularly (not obviously) and shoeboxing it in a secure, private location (not a safe-deposit-box though).  Investment vehicles? … plan ahead and see if you can covert these to cash and pull it off the market for a time.  Nice cars? … sell and trade down.  Precious Metals? … if they are paper holdings, convert them to physical and store them with the cash, or convert to cash and hide it.  Basically look at everything you think she can come after and get it disassociated with you or your ID number.

I buried s~~~ at my dad’s home in my divorce, literally getting in my car and driving 2400 miles round trip and put a safe in his attic. I put assets in his name, etc, whatever it took. Do things like this, but you are best off getting out of this before that 3 years strikes and you are battling to retain what was yours, and paying lawyers to do so..

If you are MGTOW when you are young you have no heart.
If you're not MGTOW when you are 20 you have no brain.

[IGMOW (I Go My Own Way)Participant 2572]

I would say the goal here is your own personal happiness, not meet some external “purity test” of whether or not you are “red pill/MGTOW” enough.  So long as you have a woman as your partner, it is natural to have things like you said happen.  My take is, unless that has made you miserable, don’t sweat the details and get on with your life.

I would say, unless you have an endgame by which you know what you are going to do with your new freedom, you are far less likely to try to gain freedom, because the positive here and now is much stronger than your thoughts on freedom.

"I am my own thang. Any questions?" - Davis S Pumpkins.

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

MOWsince95 wrote:

Your jointly owned house is likely a lost cause – at least to the extent that you have over 50% in it. In your case I would be more concerned that no sale occurs prior to 3 years, but that you may still be on the hook to pay 50% or more of the mortgage, but forbidden to live there. Your best bet in the case of the home is to kill the relationship WELL PRIOR to the 3 year mark and get that place on the market. Now, if you choose to stick it out to 3 years plus, here is the likely outcome: your chunk of that house will no longer be yours. It will be given to her. You stated elsewhere she seems to never have money, so anticipate losing that should it come to court. Also, since she never has money, you will likely be on the hook for some form of alimony or support payments at least for a time so she can f~~~ dudes in the home you will be paying for. If your only major asset is that home, your answer is above. GTFO before that 3 years or expect to kiss it good all bye. If you have assets associated with your ID number so that they can be traced, these will be targets in 9 months. Bank accounts? … start pulling cash NOW regularly (not obviously) and shoeboxing it in a secure, private location (not a safe-deposit-box though). Investment vehicles? … plan ahead and see if you can covert these to cash and pull it off the market for a time. Nice cars? … sell and trade down. Precious Metals? … if they are paper holdings, convert them to physical and store them with the cash, or convert to cash and hide it. Basically look at everything you think she can come after and get it disassociated with you or your ID number. I buried s~~~ at my dad’s home in my divorce, literally getting in my car and driving 2400 miles round trip and put a safe in his attic. I put assets in his name, etc, whatever it took. Do things like this, but you are best off getting out of this before that 3 years strikes and you are battling to retain what was yours, and paying lawyers to do so..

I’m reading over the commonlaw rules in Canada, and I don’t think it’s as dire as all that.  Maybe after the 3 year mark, yes.  What I need to secure is my pre-relationship assets in writing (House down payment was all from me, Car that is mine, and only paid for by me, some inheritance from my grandparent who passed, etc., and about 30K in savings/investments RRSPs.

I don’t see how hiding a cash box would benefit me, (I get that that’s as liquid as you can get, but there will still be a bank account paper trail of the withdrawal).

I think what I’m asking is a commonlaw agreement or prenuptual signed in the next 9 months would cover me.  My concern about a prenuptual, can that be used against you to show an “intent to marry” and therefor her going after more money?

 

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

Hello Canadian Sports Fan

You appear to be totally lost.  Obviously you are a Canadian but you do not tell us in which province you reside.  For example in BC the three year rule was abandoned years ago.  It was first reduced to 2 years and there is now pending legislation, which is being used by the courts even now, to reduce this to 6 months.  YES YOU HEARD ME RIGHT, 6 MONTHS.

If you find yourself living in a Common Law relationship (and this includes having a child even if you are not residing in the same house) it is regarded as a marriage-like arrangement and treated as though you had taken out a marriage license and actually married.  You are then dead.  THIS IS TOO IMPORTANT TO F~~~ AROUND WITH.  GET A LAWYER AND FIND OUT WHAT THE RULES ARE.  The women already know what the laws are.

What ever you do, get a Pre-Nuptial Agreement.  Not one off the internet.  They are useless and say virtually the same thing as a marriage contract.  There is no real additional protection.  Go to a lawyer and get a Pre-Nuptial Agreement that is specific to your case.  Your significant other has to get her own lawyer for this as well, or it is a waste of time (kiss your ass good bye).  Tell your lawyer everything you want to protect, and all the rules you want to apply if things go south.  Your lawyer will know exactly how far you can go without the Pre-Nuptial being thrown out.  It has to appear fair, and you can not give away a child’s rights to claim support from both parents.  If your significant other refuses a Pre-Nuptial Agreement, on the grounds that it is unromantic, then the response should be that a Marriage Contract is unromantic because it is a legally binding contract between the two of you and the government.

If there is a child in the relationship (even if it is not yours or hers from a previous) and you do not have a Pre-Nuptial Agreement, the courts are going to give the kids (any child of tender years) to the mother,  and the mother is going to be awarded a place to stay to bring up the children (the matrimonial home).   Even if it is not hers.  Well you say, you paid for more than half of the house already.  Well let me tell you, even if you paid 100% you would not be given the house.   When I say this, I mean that the court may award you your house, but you will not be allowed to stay in it.  You will be required to pay the mortgage payments, and you will be awarded one half of the value of the house, and one-half of all mortgage payments made, when the house is eventually sold.  So yes, you get your house, but you don’t get it until the kids are 18.

Now she will also need money to raise the kids, and she will need money to live on.  So prepare yourself to pay both Child Support and Alimony.  Do not let your spouse be a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM).  That is deadly.

One last point.  Do not have your name entered onto a Birth Certificate unless you are absolutely sure you are the father.  There should be no hesitation from your significant other to have a DNA test.

There is no way to save your idiot friend, to whom you refer in your previous post.  He is grumbling over a beer without the proper facts.  And I note that many of the comments and advice which are well intended, contain absolute bulls~~~ as well.  Free advice yeah, but HELLOOOOOOOOO.  This s~~~ is critical.  GET A LAWYER,  I NOTICE THE GUYS GIRLFIEND HAS GOT A LAWYER (she may be a cheater, but she’s smarter than him).

[RoyDalParticipant]

Like every Terminator said: Get out.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[MOWsince95Participant 1446]

Canadian SportsFan wrote:

I don’t think it’s as dire as all that

General Custer probably said something similar before the Indians slaughtered his ass.  There is a saying about marriage and divorce:
. . . . . . . . . . . “the f~~~ing you get aint worth the f~~~ing you get.”
This statement does not exist because the laws make sense.  Across the western world, they don’t.  You have a penis, therefore you will get shorted – this is the law.  As Robert says above, they keep changing the laws to infringe on you, the man, and reward the women.  Pre-nups are not to be trusted.  Now, you may think that logic will cover your ass in court, but it will not.

You have 2 choices when it comes to how to learn:
. . . . . • from our collective experience and well intended advice, or
. . . . . • the hard way
Your choice.

As for bank withdrawals, this is why I indicated not to do it all at once, but to do it regularly.  X dollars a day, or 3 times a week or whatever.  Pull cash, store it, you can claim to have spent it.  If you pull out $100k in cash you need to explain it, but if you do 400 today, 300 Wednesday, 500 Saturday etc on and on, it becomes a regular outflow.  Get it out of the bank and out of your name.  Either that, or you will lose it in 9 months.

Never trust the court to do what’s right, but if you do, then recall later what we’ve explained here when you are wondering what went wrong.

If you are MGTOW when you are young you have no heart.
If you're not MGTOW when you are 20 you have no brain.

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

Robert Hallam wrote:

Hello Canadian Sports Fan You appear to be totally lost. Obviously you are a Canadian but you do not tell us in which province you reside. For example in BC the three year rule was abandoned years ago. It was first reduced to 2 years and there is now pending legislation, which is being used by the courts even now, to reduce this to 6 months. YES YOU HEARD ME RIGHT, 6 MONTHS. If you find yourself living in a Common Law relationship (and this includes having a child even if you are not residing in the same house) it is regarded as a marriage-like arrangement and treated as though you had taken out a marriage license and actually married. You are then dead. THIS IS TOO IMPORTANT TO F~~~ AROUND WITH. GET A LAWYER AND FIND OUT WHAT THE RULES ARE. The women already know what the laws are. What ever you do, get a Pre-Nuptial Agreement. Not one off the internet. They are useless and say virtually the same thing as a marriage contract. There is no real additional protection. Go to a lawyer and get a Pre-Nuptial Agreement that is specific to your case. Your significant other has to get her own lawyer for this as well, or it is a waste of time (kiss your ass good bye). Tell your lawyer everything you want to protect, and all the rules you want to apply if things go south. Your lawyer will know exactly how far you can go without the Pre-Nuptial being thrown out. It has to appear fair, and you can not give away a child’s rights to claim support from both parents. If your significant other refuses a Pre-Nuptial Agreement, on the grounds that it is unromantic, then the response should be that a Marriage Contract is unromantic because it is a legally binding contract between the two of you and the government. If there is a child in the relationship (even if it is not yours or hers from a previous) and you do not have a Pre-Nuptial Agreement, the courts are going to give the kids (any child of tender years) to the mother, and the mother is going to be awarded a place to stay to bring up the children (the matrimonial home). Even if it is not hers. Well you say, you paid for more than half of the house already. Well let me tell you, even if you paid 100% you would not be given the house. When I say this, I mean that the court may award you your house, but you will not be allowed to stay in it. You will be required to pay the mortgage payments, and you will be awarded one half of the value of the house, and one-half of all mortgage payments made, when the house is eventually sold. So yes, you get your house, but you don’t get it until the kids are 18. Now she will also need money to raise the kids, and she will need money to live on. So prepare yourself to pay both Child Support and Alimony. Do not let your spouse be a stay-at-home-mom (SAHM). That is deadly. One last point. Do not have your name entered onto a Birth Certificate unless you are absolutely sure you are the father. There should be no hesitation from your significant other to have a DNA test. There is no way to save your idiot friend, to whom you refer in your previous post. He is grumbling over a beer without the proper facts. And I note that many of the comments and advice which are well intended, contain absolute bulls~~~ as well. Free advice yeah, but HELLOOOOOOOOO. This s~~~ is critical. GET A LAWYER, I NOTICE THE GUYS GIRLFIEND HAS GOT A LAWYER (she may be a cheater, but she’s smarter than him).

I’m in a different province, and I just checked, and currently the legislation says 3 years.  My friend’s wife is convinced it is 6 months (she is from BC) so there’s that.  It changes by province, that’s crazy.

I guess my question on Prenuptual, is it worth getting one if I have No intention to marry?  If a prenup will cover a commonlaw split then I would totally do it if it comes into effect from the date of signing.

In the next 9 months I need to get her to sign something to the effect of the car, my savings, inheritance and down payment were mine prior to the relationship.

Edit:  We have no children yet, and according to tests I’m fine, she will have a difficult time concieving.

 

[kizellParticipant 368]

If you get a lawyer,  and if you have no children with the woman, and if she is unable to afford the house on her own, then the house will either become yours totally or each will pay half (granted the house is on the market and no one lives there)

That is how most cases end up in this situation.   However if you have a child with her, you will have few easy choices.

At least in America,  the court will almost always award the mortgage to the party most able to pay if that person does not wish to sell.

If you have no children with her, there is no way a lawyer will stand aside and agree to you paying for her to live there.  I went through a divorce just like that and I got the house because I could afford it, even though she wanted to keep it

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

MOWsince95 wrote:

Canadian SportsFan wrote:

I don’t think it’s as dire as all that

General Custer probably said something similar before the Indians slaughtered his ass. There is a saying about marriage and divorce: . . . . . . . . . . . “the f~~~ing you get aint worth the f~~~ing you get.” This statement does not exist because the laws make sense. Across the western world, they don’t. You have a penis, therefore you will get shorted – this is the law. As Robert says above, they keep changing the laws to infringe on you, the man, and reward the women. Pre-nups are not to be trusted. Now, you may think that logic will cover your ass in court, but it will not. You have 2 choices when it comes to how to learn: . . . . . • from our collective experience and well intended advice, or . . . . . • the hard way Your choice. As for bank withdrawals, this is why I indicated not to do it all at once, but to do it regularly. X dollars a day, or 3 times a week or whatever. Pull cash, store it, you can claim to have spent it. If you pull out $100k in cash you need to explain it, but if you do 400 today, 300 Wednesday, 500 Saturday etc on and on, it becomes a regular outflow. Get it out of the bank and out of your name. Either that, or you will lose it in 9 months. Never trust the court to do what’s right, but if you do, then recall later what we’ve explained here when you are wondering what went wrong.

I know it, I want to start protecting assets as well…but pulling cash out, then it’s just sitting there not earning any interest, not doing anything…what just go bury cash in a box?  Seems risky to me.  I agree it would be nice to have a float just in case.  How long did you pull cash out for/how much cash did you have on hand?

[SteveParticipant 462]

Forget protecting assets (for now).

Step 1 is protect your sperm.

The cost of half a house and a few bits and bobs is nothing compared to what would happen should she get pregnant.

Be very, very careful.

(And the cash thing, take out say 200 or 300 dollars each week and hide it. Looks less obvious than a big 5000 withdrawal – a guy in his late 70’s insisted I do this, respect experience).

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

Canadian Sports Fan

You must be a hockey fan because you are such a Hick (just kidding but you are clearly a babe-in-the-woods).

Look.  If you are not going to get married, then how is a Pre-Nuptial Agreement going to apply?  Pre-Nuptial means “before marriage”.

A Pre-Nuptial Agreement is something you enter into before you get married.  FOR CHRIST SAKE, TAKE MY ADVICE AND GO SEE A LAWYER.  What you are talking about is a Co-habitation Agreement.

Second point.  Don’t believe what you read on the internet.  Surely you must understand that there is no great discrepancies between provinces.  One province follows the next when ratcheting up legislation.  Your friends wife might be more up-to-date than what you see on the internet.

[MOWsince95Participant 1446]

I kept cash and whatnot out of my name for at least a year post divorce finalization.  I was told in Washington state that she had a year to change her mind.  Then I slowly converted things back into my name or accounts.  It is far preferable to lose a few $$ interest than to lose 50% to 100% to a cheating whore. In some cases, when it came to money, I simply loaned it to my dad when he needed it, payable later with a couple bucks interest.  Was in effect a way to launder it from my name for a time, help him, and get it back, all without docs.

If you are MGTOW when you are young you have no heart.
If you're not MGTOW when you are 20 you have no brain.

[Anonymous 13]

MOWsince95 wrote:

Across the western world, they don’t. You have a penis, therefore you will get shorted – this is the law. As Robert says above, they keep changing the laws to infringe on you, the man, and reward the women. Pre-nups are not to be trusted. Now, you may think that logic will cover your ass in court, but it will not.

 

MOWsince95 wrote:

Now, if you choose to stick it out to 3 years plus, here is the likely outcome: your chunk of that house will no longer be yours. It will be given to her. You stated elsewhere she seems to never have money, so anticipate losing that should it come to court. Also, since she never has money, you will likely be on the hook for some form of alimony or support payments at least for a time so she can f~~~ dudes in the home you will be paying for. If your only major asset is that home, your answer is above. GTFO before that 3 years or expect to kiss it good all bye

 

Just reiterating that for you.  All of you, wow what a f~~~ed world.

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

Steve wrote:

Forget protecting assets (for now). Step 1 is protect your sperm. The cost of half a house and a few bits and bobs is nothing compared to what would happen should she get pregnant. Be very, very careful. (And the cash thing, take out say 200 or 300 dollars each week and hide it. Looks less obvious than a big 5000 withdrawal – a guy in his late 70’s insisted I do this, respect experience).

 

I guess more specifically, where do I hide it?  Safe deposit boxes can be found.  Hiding cash in the house could be found.

 

[Crazy CanuckMember 4215]

Without telling us which province you live in it’s just a guess.

"If pussy was a stock it would be plummeting right now because you've flooded the market with it. You're giving it away too easy." - Dave Chapelle

[SteveParticipant 462]

Don’t hide it in your house dips~~~ 😉

Hide it in a friends place, a family members place, hide it under a tree if you really have no other options!

Just please HIDE YOUR SPERM FIRST!!!

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

Crazy Canuck wrote:

Without telling us which province you live in it’s just a guess.

I checked for my province, is up to date, 3 years commonlaw is the current law.  I plan to read the regs in full in the next day or so.

[Canadian SportsFanParticipant 216]

Steve wrote:

Don’t hide it in your house dips~~~ Hide it in a friends place, a family members place, hide it under a tree if you really have no other options! Just please HIDE YOUR SPERM FIRST!!!

Point taken, Like I would hide it at my house! I don’t honestly think I have a friend I trust enough to hang onto a large amount of cash for me.  As for burying/hiding it somewhere, well, that could be found pretty easily, I can’t think of anywhere that would be secure enough. I guess I could bury a lockbox at my parents house one day when they’re away.  Slight risk they would find it though.

 

[BeerParticipant 11832]

If you don’t have to worry about common law marriage and the only joint asset you have is the house, just tell her your done, you want to sell the house, and move out.  I’m assuming she can’t afford it on her own…what are her choices…she can sell it and split the proceeds with you since its half yours, refuse to sell it, fall behind on payments, and neither of you get anything, or she can find a new sucker to split it with her and you can agree to a refi if she buys you out…otherwise your name is still on it and its technically half yours.  Or maybe you want to keep it and you can offer her the chance to buy her out if you can get her to leave.

If your worried you paid 2/3 of the costs and she paid 1/3 yet your only going to get 1/2 of the sale…just forget about it…the longer you stay the more its going to cost you.  GTFO as fast as you can if you plan on ending it.  Just consider it a bad investment, and a learning experience and move along.

[Author]

Posts