Ryder – Father and MGHOW

[RyderParticipant 28]

The oldest from a broken family. Mom wasn’t happy or in love anymore, and ever since someone came up with the bright idea of making marriage about “love”, now people naturally abandon it when it no longer feels like love. (this is why arranged marriages work, BTW… because it’s not about love. It’s about kids… not maintaining a princess fantasy)

Dad was consumed by the divorce. He knew who he was when he was a father… but as a divorced man that lost his kids to a wife that left him, he became lost and the divorce consumed him. Anger and rage. It’s not that he was seriously wronged… mom didn’t want anything from him… but the state sure did… years of legal battles later, he finally grew tired and died too early from the substance abuse he fell into. He didn’t know how to live for himself.

So I get married… have an amazing son, and discover that my wife wants to control me. Tantrums and complaints… and wanting to separate me from my family. She wants me to herself. After 6 years or so, I get the ultimatum in a marriage counseling session: Break off with your family, or the marriage is over.

The therapist is stunned. I’m not.

Have it your way. The marriage is over.

I didn’t take it lightly… I wanted to spare my 5 year old son the pain of divorce… so I resolved to make it work the best I could.

I treated that woman well. Made sure she was happy as we transitioned to being apart. Why? Because for my son to experience the least hurt and pain… she had to be as happy as I could make her. I did it for him… and to make sure I didn’t lose him. We didn’t get lawyers… we took care of it ourselves with a paralegal… never went to a courtroom… All of that is for suckers.

And I got out clean. And fast. Intact. Still a man. We shared our son and raised him as best we could… as equal parents.

Doing the right thing for your child when you want to express anger and rage over the insane choices of a woman (and likely cheater… but I don’t know and don’t care), is a hard thing, but being sensible and wise enough, I did the heavy lifting up front.

Back to dating… I f~~~ing dated. Plenty. Had my young college freshman 20 years my junior, got the threesome checked off the list, and f~~~ed any attractive disease free woman I cared to… having fun, but also looking for the right girl if she came along.

She didn’t.

What a mixed bag of insanity! Defective women… paranoid, controlling, damaged… half in therapy or living with a 4-legged hairy man substitute… a dog. Attractive on the outside… some interesting… some intelligent… all tweaked.

I slipped into MGTOW without knowing what it was… trying to be a great dad (and not saddling him with a loony step mom). Never once did I consider remarrying… and have no intention to. Dem bitches is crazy. The ones that are available, are available for a reason, yes?

The last gf is the one that cooked it. I moved her in as a favor… she lost her job… and even though we’d not been together long, I offered to let her move in to help with her situation… prop her up a little while she looked for work (which she found). But then she got laid off again, and then again. She had issues. And plenty of em… you’re going to find that out, living with someone. And naturally she started to pack on the pounds.

At my age, I don’t *need* sex. What I need is a hot woman that makes me want to put in the effort… otherwise I might just watch Star Trek reruns… let Captain Kirk do the hard work 🙂

You reject a woman sexually? They absolutely cannot handle that. Can not. It’s their currency! And the bank was no longer accepting that kind. I was in control… the seat of power, I could take her or leave her… but I just left her be… to see if she might ever figure out what she needed to do. Mostly shut up and stop eating so much… but she couldn’t take a hint.

Finally, it was time for her to go. That was last year, and I’m a happy man again.

Been successful in my career with major tech firms… six figures, stable… a nice guy (that learned to not be a mangina).

Just recently I told my son in no uncertain terms… any guy that gets married is an idiot… and made him watch the documentary: Divorce Corp.
That will put the fear of God into any man.

It may be the best advice I ever gave him.

But after discovering MGTOW, I learned a few things about the philosophical character of it… and went to work this past week with the red pill attitude on… curious to see how women take it. Work is a great place to experiment with that kind of thing… and being an office space, we have a few hotties around.

Strangely, and this is odd for me… I’ve been attracted to an abusive little girl… I’d never *be* with her. Might f~~~ her… but her abusive nature just won’t fly. Damaged goods. I took it all as a sign that she was actually crazy about me… and used abuse to create some distance. But I’m thick skinned, and honestly can’t give a crap about her abuse. But today I took a couple reds and went in. Indifferent. I don’t blame her for being a damaged princess. That’s what society is doing… but of course doesn’t mean I have to accept it. So I basically ignored her. Amazingly, she wanted my help for things… is treating me nicely. She knows something is up… and wants to check it out…

Funny as hell. But my days of any interest at all are done…

The key is not to hate women. They are f~~~ed up… but no need to hate or blame them for being that way. Gotta blame them for what they *do*, but not for being messed up in this post feminist world. Most of them didn’t ask for it…. and I sure don’t want us thoughtful fellas to go down the hater road that feminism did. We’re better than that.

I wash my Ferrari with the tears of lonely feminists.

[UntamedParticipant]

Hello, Ryder and welcome!
Thank you for sharing. It’s so sad about your dad but I’m glad you didn’t go down that road and were able to compromise with your X for the benefit of your boy. Many other fathers don’t have that chance.
It’s always nice to see another man going his own way sign up and bringing his experiences to share on here.
Enjoy the site, bro.
Cheers!

Don't let them Blame, Shame or Tame you!
Give 'em NOTHING, not even an answer!
#GenderSegragationNow!

[Anonymous 5]

Welcome Ryder, thanks for the great read.
I just had a look at the trailer for Divorce Corp. It was chilling confirmation of something we all already knew.
It’s supposed to be on Netflix but I couldn’t find it there, probably because I’m in Australia. I’ll keep searching for a copy.
The same industry practices apply all across the Western world. Specialists are making billions, not just wives, off the misguided, well meaning ignorance of men believing in love and the dream of life long marriage.
All this “romantic love” marriage only started in the Western world in the last 200 years or so.
Just about all societies throughout all of history independently came up with the arranged marriage system to avoid “romantic” based partnerships.
It was this reality of the business of separation that led me going my own way long before I discovered red pills or MGTOW.
I’d always thought it was just the women I dealt with, and the women my friends and people I knew till I had a quick read of “The Manipulated man” by Esther Vilar.
“The Anatomy of Female Power” was another re-wiring of my belief system.

Your right, it’s pointless and counter productive to dislike women for being women. It’s like disliking men for being men.

[WallyParticipant]

Welcome Ryder, hope your son lives your advice. Divorce Corp was an eye opening movie and more frightening than any horror movie. I knew divorce was bad, but I had no idea how corrupt the family court system is.

"what a waste of a life, to marry, give up your freedom, just for the hope of not dying alone. Don't get married Son."

[John Woods 13Participant 2855]

Welcome Ryder! Thank you for sharing your story. It was a very good read, to the point and very articulate. I’m glad that you found the strength to keep your emotions in check and do what was best for your son. You were also lucky, as you probably know from reading other introductions here, since most women are a lot less reasonable and will drag a man through hell in a divorce. So please, if you can, do share some thoughts on how you went about your separation peacefully. It will help a lot of us who are still married and are or will be going through divorces.

The answer is NO. “I could but I won’t”. Memini murum!

[Anonymous 18]

Thanks for sharing your story. A warm welcome.

The entire concept of love and marriage is oil and water. You are bound to hate the guts of the person you are with 24/7. Once in a while. Anything new feels refreshing only to get old. Women don’t understand this concept. They manage to love by not being in love. Or so they say.

F~~~ing a man in divorce court and thereafter opening the revolving door of men to enter her vagina and children’s conscience is her being a strong, defiant woman.

Only difference is she now becomes the host to thristy men who act parasitic and follow the pump and dump routine. A taste of her own medicine.

[OldscoundrellParticipant 412]

Welcome. Great read.

Ryder wrote:

I treated that woman well. Made sure she was happy as we transitioned to being apart. Why? Because for my son to experience the least hurt and pain… she had to be as happy as I could make her. I did it for him… and to make sure I didn’t lose him

The use of projection of the kid to the mother is very important and underrated in my opinion.

I take this route in my situation and it keeps everything much more civil.
Also, with my children, there are boundaries that I have set for them, to prevent bratty behavior. Which is a method that also carries over to the ex.

[RyderParticipant 28]

John Woods 13 wrote:

So please, if you can, do share some thoughts on how you went about your separation peacefully.

Absolutely. And it’s a big subject so I’ll go ahead and do it outside of introductions…

When it’s really important is when your kids are involved: If that is the case: Keep your cool. Don’t act in anger. Ever. This is the time for you to do your best and be at your best. Be ready to have honest discussions with her about harming kids… and how lawyers get all the money. “We’re good parents… let’s be sure the kids get that money, not the lawyers.”, and ditto with the pain… and the time. “No sense in having them, and ourselves, go through all that pain, just so the lawyers can buy a new car. They want to rip you and the kids off. They want to rip me off. It’s easy to do it without them… just fill out forms and life goes on.” This is attractive to anyone that has *any* sanity at all. For the rest… good luck.

And then let the small stuff slide… and trust me, next to your kids… it’s ALL small stuff.

When she says “I want your tools”, know the bitch is insane, and evil… but calmly say: “I really could use them… but if you think you need them too, you’re welcomed to them…” and then move on.

By the end of the process, you’ll likely have your tools. She’ll “change her mind”, and give them back… because she knows she doesn’t want them… and if she can’t hurt you with that, no point in having them.

I’ll start a larger thread tonight in some other area though… and we can visit all the problem areas.

I was “lucky”, but like men have always known… you make your own luck.

I wash my Ferrari with the tears of lonely feminists.

[Dark KenshiParticipant 2132]

Fine read, brother.

We got ourselves not one, but one and possible a second brother into our brotherhood.

Welcome, we have been waiting for you all these years, my friend. Welcome to your home, to the place where you can be yourself, when you want to.

Grab a couple of cold ones, have a sit around our fire, because I am eager to hear more from your experiences, to take notes, to listen, to read, and then to compare with mine’s, if you have the patience and the will to share with us more from your notes, mate.

Welcome to the last bastion, fortress and shelter for men. Welcome to MGTOW.com.

"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Thank you for sharing! I love reading the introductions. Welcome to the brotherhood.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[StanAndreasParticipant 160]

Thanks for your story, and for protecting your son. May he learn your lessons and not repeat them for himself.

And +1 on not hating women. Like scorpions, hating them won’t change them or help anyone.

Safety rules: All guns are loaded. All knives are sharp. All stoves are hot. All women are like that.

[Author]

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