Principled and Conditional behaviors

[narwhalParticipant]

It’s commonly stated around here that women are chameleons. In others words, the behave like an angel when you meet them, to draw you, and then show their true colors when they have you hooked.

That concept reminds me of something my ex told my about a year into our marriage. She told me that she thought marriage would change me, but I never changed. I took it personally and interpreted to mean that she didn’t really love me to begin with, only assumed she would grow to love me. Now, I don’t think this quite accurate.

Related to that, like most wives, my ex-wife changed drastically between dating and marriage. I assumed she would stay the same.

She assumed my behavior was conditional, and would change as conditions changed. I assumed her behavior was principled, that it would not change when conditions changed. Both of assumed we would behave the same way that they do.

Of course there are exceptions, but generally speaking, men are principled. They expect other men to be principled as well, and are usually correct. We see Chad for what he is and don’t expect him to ever change. We expect women to behave the same way. We expect the sweet and loving woman we first met to stay that way, and are shocked when all that stops when it no longer is required to maintain her lifestyle, or no longer brings in the same returns it used to. We are surprised when we are treated like kings one day and like slaves once a baby comes.

Women are generally conditional. Everything about them will change. When they see Chad, they fully expect that his behavior will change if they change his conditions, since that’s exactly what they would do. They are surprised when Chad is still the same guy, and didn’t turn into superdad/husband once you married him.

You can see it in many facets of their behavior. Men have smaller wardrobes, and rarely change the way they look. Women have huge wardrobes and change the way they look on a daily basis. Men have few hobbies and tend to be more dedicated and stick with them longer. Women change their hobbies as their life changes. Men wear uniforms, women wear costumes.

And I’m not saying there are no principled women, or that no man is conditional.

From a biological standpoint, I can see where it’s makes sense for both men and women to behave this way. Men need to stay principled and never waiver with changing conditions. I can see where women, mother’s, need to change as conditions change. I’m not saying either is incorrect exactly.

I’m not proposing that anything changes. I’m just wondering if anyone else sees what I sees.

Ok. Then do it.

[Anonymous 54]

Mens Princables are unwavering.

Women have none.

[Secret Agent MGTOWParticipant 22515]

Women demand to have their conditional behavior, this IS their principle.

Have you forgotten “Its a womans prerogative to change her mind”?

They may not go around saying this anymore, but that is their actions.

Women want everything, but want responsibility and accountability for nothing.

[Chase PesosParticipant 2136]

Narwhal,

When they *think* they have you hooked.

Dumb broads can’t even behave for a week without slipping up.

Chase a check, never chase a chick...

[narwhalParticipant]

Yes, that is true, but I would say women’s frustrations, and inability to understand and appreciate men might just stem from the fact that they expect women to behave like they do.

As an example, my wife told me that I was arrogant, and that she thought marriage would change that in me. That statement makes no sense to me. It made perfect sense to her. Probably because she did and expected to change when she got married. She did expected to change when having a baby. They do not get why men don’t go from being carefree single men to dedicated husbands once they say ‘I do’. They don’t get why men don’t dream about baby showers and such. They don’t get why a man doesn’t want to trade his motorcycle for a minivan.

Ok. Then do it.

[ghostParticipant]

Nature is what it is. No complaints. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

[2icebittenParticipant 147]

“Men wear uniforms, women wear costumes.” So true.

My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style. - Maya Angelou

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