Home › Forums › Marriage & Divorce › My uncles life is effectively over
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, 2 years, 11 months ago.
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This post may become relatively long if I’m not careful so I will do my best to condense it down.
I am looking for some opinions/advice/thoughts from older MGTOW members and anyone who has been married/ divorced in the past as I am struggling to comprehend what is possibly going through my uncle’s mind at this time.
I am a relatively young MGTOW member at 21 years of age who thankfully has not had to deal with the drama, heartbreak and financial scorn that many of you have had to endure and have never been in any serious relationship and certainly don’t intend to moving forward. Reading many of your guys stories about your dealings with women in the past makes this situation even harder for me to understand.
So my uncle is in his early 40s and went through a messy divorce after his 1st wife cheated on him (surprise surprise) which took him a couple of years to recover from. Now about 3/4 years ago he met this new women I believe through his work or something like that and decided to get in a relationship with her. They now have a kid together (no kids from his first marriage) and live with each other.
The problems started about six months ago when it turns out this women he is with has serious f~~~ing problems. (Again, no surprise)
She’s a good bit younger than him, and in her mid-20s she comes from a family of 5 sisters (she’s the worst looking one) where the mum basically controls the family. Since having their child, (refers to it as her child btw) she has been on maternity leave for what feels like an eternity and works a dead end retail job so financially doesn’t contribute much anyway. From my understanding, some of the other sisters have boyfriends/ husbands, but from an outside perspective seem to be very controlling and dominant in the relationships they are in. Since having their kid about a year ago, she has really began to show some very undesirable characteristics. Narcissistic, delusional, selfish, immature, etc. and I only ever come into contact with her at family gatherings, so god knows what she’s like to live with and be around on a day to day basis.
In the past six months, she has, in my opinion, deliberately created arguments with members of my family to cause a divide between my uncle and the rest of the immediate family effectively isolating him and causing tension. Consequently, she is almost universally disliked by my family (both male and female) and has created an ‘us vs. them’ mentality.
Unfortunately for my uncle, he has lost his mind and decided to propose to her on international MGTOW day (ironic), and they will likely get married later on in the year or possibly 2018.
The one and only question I have is what the f~~~ is he thinking?
Does he not see what everyone else sees? Is he being manipulated and brainwashed by pussy? After going through one divorce already I thought he would have learned his lesson by now. Considering this is how the new women is acting BEFORE they are even married I can only imagine what she will be like moving forward.
Wondering what your guys opinion on the issue is as I, fortunately, lack a lot of the relationship experience that many of you have, and just can’t comprehend why he would want to ruin his life.
I want to help him, but I feel like there is nothing I can do and he is destined to a life of blue pill cucked misery.
The single biggest threat to your happiness is women and the only way to win is to not play the game
Anonymous13Some people never wake up from cradle to grave.
I’m sorry for your uncle, this woman is a pure toxin.
Try and show him this site, he’s doomed anyway so you have nothing to lose by trying to wake him up by any means possible.
If you fail at least you can say you tried.
Good luck!
He proposed on 02.14??? And one divorce already?
From what you have said, the man is gone. Finished. Out of a shell.
The character descriptions of the female are very common, social manipulations, creating friction & conflict to alienate etc….. but it’s remarkable that some men still women for bitchy behavior. Like going to crib every time a baby cries. It effectively TRAINS a crybaby to be an even BIGGER crybaby.
what the f~~~ is he thinking?
He’s not thinking at all.
Does he not see what everyone else sees? Is he being manipulated and brainwashed by pussy?
Esther Vilar – author of “The Manipulated Man” – explains some men are inclined and quite contented to enslave themselves. Like after being released from prison, he will look for ways to enslave himself again (commit another crime ) and go back to what he knows. The perpetual state of a slave.
Consider making that book an early wedding present.
You can also download the PDF and read it yourself first.
It’s a punch in the gut.He won’t like you for it. After I was done reading, I read it again. I didn’t know whether to kick the author, or kiss her.
I want to help him, but I feel like there is nothing I can do
You can’t teach a child what “hot” is. It’s IMPOSSIBLE.
Every child MUST burn it’s own finger at least once.Same kind of thing. You can warn, explain, say “don’t touch it!”… and it won’t make a bit of difference. Cap wrote an epic thread a while back called “Let Them Touch the Hot Stove” about men who demonize other men for warning them. If you do attempt to teach him anything and he hates you for it….well…. let him touch the hot stove. Again.
—
I have made an impact before by dropping little questions – usually with a s~~~ eating grin so the guy doesn’t know if I am joking. The woman knows what I am up to, but I don’t give a f~~~ about her.
• “Are you really gonna let her get away that?”
• “Are you really gonna let her speak to you like that?”
• “She’s your FIANCEE? Why does she treat you like she HATES you?”You get the idea.
No man should ever sign a marriage contract with a woman who HATES him enough to actually let him go through with it.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.He proposed on 02.14??? And one divorce already?
Somehow this is, in fact, correct.
Even the women in my family can’t understand it and you know it’s bad when even they admit it.
He’s already stuck with her regardless for the next 15/20 years because of the child they now have together, but I see getting married to her as the nail in the coffin.
My uncle is a genuinely good guy in many ways but when it comes to his ‘ love life’ he is making incredibly bad decisions. Almost the worst ones you can possibly make and these decisions are going to ruin every other aspect of his life.
I believe that she has gotten him so brainwashed to the point that he could become defensive quickly if challenged on anything.
However, I will try in any way I can to help make him see sense even if it is to no avail.
The single biggest threat to your happiness is women and the only way to win is to not play the game
Chick is either Latina or philipino. Mother is in control and giving advice to daughters. Any man her daughters get is now her asset. Pregnancy was obviously on purpose. Now she is in the process of isolating your uncle so that no one can provide input into his life and f~~~ up her program.
He is feeling like he is the problem and that he doesn’t want to fail again. Only thing you can do is send him here and prey. He will be taken for everything in a divorce, and the daughter will hook another chump before she turns thirty.
When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.
I believe that she has gotten him so brainwashed to the point that he could become defensive quickly if challenged on anything.
Well you know what they say about waking a sleepwalker……
prey.
You meant “pray”… but it’s the perfect typo.
He’s definitely her prey.
If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.I believe that she has gotten him so brainwashed to the point that he could become defensive quickly if challenged on anything.
Well you know what they say about waking a sleepwalker……
prey.
You meant “pray”… but its the perfect typo.
Ha! Thanks for pointing it out. I’m gonna use that
When you find yourself in the majority, it's time to reflect.
The most frustrating thing is I can see her slowly controlling and manipulating him into doing whatever her plan is but as an outsider to the relationship you feel very powerless to help him.
I actually believe the marriage may survive unless she decides to end it eventually which is likely. She isn’t exactly a great catch though so she may think my uncle is the best she will have.
From my uncles perspective, this has to work out. He can’t emotionally or financially afford to go through another divorce, so I believe he will stay with her even if he ends up being unhappy.
If they were to separate, he would hardly see his child be forced out of his own home, and I’m not his accountant, but I’d imagine be financially ruined, so I believe he will stay with her.
Honestly, if there was ever an advertisement to avoid women she is it.
The single biggest threat to your happiness is women and the only way to win is to not play the game
Anonymous54Im embarresed to admit..married 3 times. Yeah, go ahead and laugh. I deserve it.
Tell you the truth its all so long ago, and Ive changed so much, I cant remember what I was thinking.Just need for pussy, and the desire for a womans love I suppose.
But I do know that when a man is in love, he wont even hear a word your saying.
Sometimes you just have to leave a man to his suffering.
He proposed on 02.14??? And one divorce already?
From what you have said, the man is gone. Finished. Out of a shell.
The character descriptions of the female are very common, social manipulations, creating friction & conflict to alienate etc….. but it’s remarkable that some men still women for bitchy behavior. Like going to crib every time a baby cries. It effectively TRAINS a crybaby to be an even BIGGER crybaby.
what the f~~~ is he thinking?
He’s not thinking at all.
Does he not see what everyone else sees? Is he being manipulated and brainwashed by pussy?
Esther Vilar – author of “The Manipulated Man” – explains some men are inclined and quite contented to enslave themselves. Like after being released from prison, he will look for ways to enslave himself again (commit another crime ) and go back to what he knows. The perpetual state of a slave.
Consider making that book an early wedding present.
You can also download the PDF and read it yourself first.
It’s a punch in the gut.He won’t like you for it. After I was done reading, I read it again. I didn’t know whether to kick the author, or kiss her.
I want to help him, but I feel like there is nothing I can do
You can’t teach a child what “hot” is. It’s IMPOSSIBLE.
Every child MUST burn it’s own finger at least once.Same kind of thing. You can warn, explain, say “don’t touch it!”… and it won’t make a bit of difference. Cap wrote an epic thread a while back called “Let Them Touch the Hot Stove” about men who demonize other men for warning them. If you do attempt to teach him anything and he hates you for it….well…. let him touch the hot stove. Again.
—
I have made an impact before by dropping little questions – usually with a s~~~ eating grin so the guy doesn’t know if I am joking. The woman knows what I am up to, but I don’t give a f~~~ about her.
• “Are you really gonna let her get away that?”
• “Are you really gonna let her speak to you like that?”
• “She’s your FIANCEE? Why does she treat you like she HATES you?”You get the idea.
No man should ever sign a marriage contract with a woman who HATES him enough to actually let him go through with it.
Great post, I downloaded the book from a thread here.
Like you say was a kick in the guts to see all your life you have been playing a rigged game, but I smiled a lot seeing so many incidences the same.
Like has been said some guys are only happy when they are being abused by women, it’s their usual state.
Same as Old Brooks in Shawshank institutionalised, the c~~~ is just telling the guy she is the boss, she wants the marriage for a decent bake out package that’s all.
Your title = sad truth.
Laydeez are butterflies undergoing reverse metamorphosis.
The process is unstoppable."It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."
Some people never wake up from cradle to grave.
THIS^^^
I know one guy who wants to get married again after getting f~~~ed over by FOUR previous wives. There is also the ego factor and plain old stubbornness. Some guys just believe that they’re smart and that they’ve really found the right one…this time!
Another thing that works against and defeats common sense is the human ‘need to believe’. No matter how much facts, truth and reality contradict what one wants to believe to be true, the emotion driven ‘need to believe’ will often override logic and rationality. Your uncle wants to believe that he’s found that rainbow s~~~ting NAWALT unicorn and no amount of rationality is likely going to counter that belief.
The bottom line is that you’re just going to have to accept the fact that your uncle is going to have to figure it out for himself. It sucks, I know…
F~~~…..
Where do i even begin.
”
in the past six months, she has, in my opinion, deliberately created arguments with members of my family to cause a divide between my uncle and the rest of the immediate family effectively isolating him and causing tension.”
It seems to me that you’re uncle has hit the maximum level of pussy whipped that he shot through the roof and continued into space. “Isolation”, and this in my opinion one of Women’s most powerful tool that I’ve seen countless times as well as my own previous marriage (i moved to Singapore because that’s where my ex was from).
They use isolation as a tool, Familiarity breeds contempt in a Women’s heart when you have good friends, close family members around you.
It’s always cracked me up when most women say:
“i love that he has strong family values, and loves his parents”
this does NOT mean what you think it does. (Actual Translation)
“you will take my s~~~, and raise MY KIDS and won’t ever speak back to me or disrespect me in public”.another thing they absolutely HATE is your friend’s and this you can take to the bank!. I dated a girl once who absolutely hated all my friends, for whatever reason i had no idea, but you can’t think as to why, you have to think again as in “Isolation”. If she sees that your friends are honest or straight forward with you, then they will be able to tell you “Hey Man, this girl isn’t right for you”, so the female see’s this as a threat.
I’ll give you an example, I dated this girl for a several months, we went thru the motions and eventually i introduced her to a buddy of mine that is very straightforward and He has always looked out for me through thick and thin. The girl i dated saw this as a threat, and every once in awhile she’d throw in these manipulative women speak words to try and sway me into her way of thinking, needless to say that didn’t f~~~ing work so i dumped her ass.
Bottom line, Women love manipulating, control, and isolating a Man. Why?, because if he can’t speak up for himself, others will (i.e. his friends and family). So she eliminates that factor all together and then plays the victim if a friend or family member calls her out on her s~~~ or is straightforward with her.
Best thing you can do is be straight forward with your Uncle and bring up some grievances you’ve seen thus far.
Best of luck to You Bud.
"If You have the Tooth of a Whale, You must have the Whale's Jaw to hold it". (i.e. One Must have the right qualifications for leadership) -Hawaiian Proverb
Does he not see what everyone else sees? Is he being manipulated and brainwashed by pussy? After going through one divorce already I thought he would have learned his lesson by now. Considering this is how the new women is acting BEFORE they are even married I can only imagine what she will be like moving forward.
Wondering what your guys opinion on the issue is as I, fortunately, lack a lot of the relationship experience that many of you have, and just can’t comprehend why he would want to ruin his life.
I want to help him, but I feel like there is nothing I can do and he is destined to a life of blue pill cucked misery.
Simply put the pussy and the small head are in collusion to wreck your uncle’s life… usually the small head does your thinking when you are young but your big head should take over (sometimes too late) by your 30’s. Your uncle needs a good dose of wake the f~~~ up.
I know one guy who wants to get married again after getting f~~~ed over by FOUR previous wives.
Must be a masochist lol
Knowledge is power..... Don't waste your brain on bullshit
The one and only question I have is what the f~~~ is he thinking?
May as well bury him, figuratively. HIS LIFE is over. If and when he wakes up he’ll be p~~~ed.
I could have been that Uncle too. NOPE got lucky as my post D gal-holes were older than me.
Since he has a new kid, its best to let him sleep…with joy/without hate
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