My future job may not suit me after all

[AscendedParticipant 698]

Oops. I happen to have double posted. My internet is fault.

"We are free to follow our own path. There are those who will take that freedom from us, and too many of you gladly give it. But it is our ability to choose – whatever you think is true – that makes us human. There is no book or teacher to give you the answers, to show you the path. Choose your own way! Do not follow me, or anyone else."

[AscendedParticipant 698]

Gentlemen,
I’m writing this to let others know of what I am going through. Others may read this so they can (re)direct their life easier. I also hope to get some support for my situation because it does not seem pleasant at all for me.

My situation is this:
Today I am 21 years old and am working in an IT area as QA. I don’t have much issues with my current job and am fairly satisfied with it at the moment, not planning to change yet. This is my first job ever and I have been working for 5 months already. I am also a distant student studying Computer Programming as in vocational education and went through 3 out of 6 semesters as of today. I moved away from my parents into the city to begin a more than deserved good custom life.
My project organizer told me, that I am to become a developer in the future. Before our project began I have been trained to write some very basic and simple programs using C#, Windows forms and console applications (cmd) with Visual Studio.

So far so damn good the story for a guy of my age eh?
Well, that’s where the good part ends and the bad part moves closer to begin.

I have attempted to program – a lot. I made dozens of projects, solved almost all scholastic tasks with A’s on my institute, explored VS and did everything related to be trained to be a programmer. I have been given to read a book from a programmer expert (author) to teach about .NET and C# programming. This book (Troelsen) is as giant as 1500 pages and I stopped reading after page 300-something because I learned only the slightest amount for 300 pages and wasted time.
One of my last projects keeps popping up with an error message something like to enable “JIT Debugger” in my VS project. I looked up on the internet to solve my problem and I couldn’t do it because the instructions were misdirecting… right from Microsoft. I also had many questions about programming and more often than not I could not find the solution for it, kept googling, figuring, exploring and searching. Nope. Nothing.

Whenever I study programming or look for a solution for my programs and errors 90% of all times I have this exact reaction

Maybe I do can program but couldn’t prove it officially on the field and this is why I (under)estimate my programming skills.
It is fun indeed when I create something myself and see it working. But very often my projects tend to have compiling issues and runtime errors. Basically – for me – programming is like a woman: It tells you something is wrong but it won’t tell you exactly what. Go figure… and while doing so forget about sex (porn) tonight while figuring it out. Have fun spending the rest of the day including your free time about what’s wrong. That’s your punishment for misbehaving unintentionally. If you manage to fix it on time, I’ll reconsider about that sex part.

And if this is what programmers become

A programmer stereotype:
A mindless and sleepless zombie, constantly sitting on it’s computer and coding. Tasks, that are so intense, that it interferes with it’s personal free time and dreams, forcing you to keep up until not earlier than 2 AM or 02:00 and replace it’s blood streams with coffee because you depend on it. It has impacted it’s life so much, that programming and codes revolves around it. It’s soul is bend over to programming and it’s body resulted in long term unhealthy alteration. 99% of all thoughts are about programming and codes. No neurons left for anything else.

OK, maybe this is a little overdone but this stereotype exists.
If this is what programmers become then I want no part of this. I value my own and personal life, health, freedom, my well being, happiness and choices like nothing else above in no certain order. No price is worth giving any of these up. I either want to live well and in peace or cease to exist. Nothing in between.

So basically I do not like programming. It’s not for me, it ain’t my passion. I lost my interest. I find it rather depressing and the feeling of being left out.
I remember when a physician professor back in my institute said “Choosing and following a profession you do not like equals to your life wasted.”
So why did I choose programming as my profession?
I didn’t. 2 “Special” somebodies did it… for me. Because they approved it and thought it is for me because I happen to have a hobby related to PCs.
I thought at first it would be cool to write a very own and awesome program by your hands. But I didn’t learn to do so. I stay in one place with this profession and it’s all about simple calculations with vars.
And everyone brags big time about programming how successful programmers are and how rich they become. I can not imagine that with something I do not like to do.
I had to start studying this or else I wouldn’t be the MGHOW I am today. I literally accepted this as an escape plan so I could burn rubber from the madness.

I know, I know. Go after something, that you like is the saying. Well I like PC gaming, multimedia editors and modding. My favourite is Photoshop and I know some tricks about it. I also did some work with Sony Vegas and enjoyed to be the director. I also would like to alter some sounds and create models and animations for some games. Mapping is something I used to do and wouldn’t mind to become one. Something like these are my areas of professional favor. But not programming and codes.

It is not too late for me to turn around. I am 21 and that’s still very young. I have just ended up in the wrong area and must be reallocated to where I actually belong to.

"We are free to follow our own path. There are those who will take that freedom from us, and too many of you gladly give it. But it is our ability to choose – whatever you think is true – that makes us human. There is no book or teacher to give you the answers, to show you the path. Choose your own way! Do not follow me, or anyone else."

[RoyDalParticipant]

Two possibilities.

* You overcome the hurdles.
— This may be the case, because you are doing well at schoolwork.
— Try a different text! Your library likely will have them, or get a used one from Amazon.

* You simply are not cut out for programming.
— If you decide this is it, nudge your boss away from assigning you to development and into something you are good at.

In either case, stay in touch with the job market. “Always be looking for your next job.” — A corporate CEO said this.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[BeeParticipant 700]

You know what you need to do. Change jobs while you’re young and it will be easier.

Don’t wait until you’re 41 and can barely stand it anymore but can’t change due to commitments like me.

[Enjoy The DeclineParticipant 1719]

Bee wrote:

You know what you need to do. Change jobs while you’re young and it will be easier.

Don’t wait until you’re 41 and can barely stand it anymore but can’t change due to commitments like me.

Link

“2014 Median Pay – $77,550 per year – $37.28 per hour”

Man, if he played his cards right, if he becomes a computer programmer till age 41, I am sure he will accumulate enough money to retire at that age, if anything. Remember, this job is very high in demand right now so I suggest that he would tough it out since it is not like he will do it till he is age 65.

"Question everything" - Albert Einstein

[AscendedParticipant 698]

I dont like the sound of it, bunker.
Again, I’m not into programming and coding. I however can solve school tasks and create simple calculations and that’s it.
I repeat, I value my health and well being. Because coffee is qualified as a drug stimulant it may harm more intense than benefit on the long run, resulting in dependence and high risk of insomnia… at least for me. I gave up coffee half a year ago and use it only as a quick fix up when I need to change my sleep pattern like an utility. I like and prefer it that way.

I may need to find a new job because I do not like it now and can hardly imagine it to become better after 5, 10 years… if I do not now.
I do have a life and I’m not going to toss it into 1000 books. I don’t read books either… except this one book I listed above. I have reached my new record of reading past 300 pages and that’s where I stopped. Too long, too boring and uninformative. This is what books are in my eyes.

"We are free to follow our own path. There are those who will take that freedom from us, and too many of you gladly give it. But it is our ability to choose – whatever you think is true – that makes us human. There is no book or teacher to give you the answers, to show you the path. Choose your own way! Do not follow me, or anyone else."

[Author]

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