MARRIAGE and INFIDELITY – QUESTION

[Robert HallamParticipant 696]

This post was triggered by a comment from Won’t Fool Me Again under a similar title.  It was his contention that almost any female would cheat on her husband if the circumstances presented themselves, and the woman in question (AWALT) confused boredom in her marriage with a lack of what the majority of women refer to as their “needs” (romance, emotional support, communication, sexual stimulation/satisfaction etc.).  I think Won’t Fool Me Again is absolutely right.   After reading dozens, if not hundreds of web pages devoted to this s~~~, it seems as though it is almost universal.  Blame the husband for her infidelity because he wasn’t living up to her expectations of a never ending-feeling-of-elation that every teenage girl gets when she has her first romance.  They claim the marriage has died, there is no more love, the sex is boring, he treats me like a roommate,  I may as well not be there, on and on.  In essence they didn’t expect the marriage to enter the hum-drum phase of normalcy, they thought they would for ever more be living in a fantasy.

Here is my question.  How many men out there have

a)  refused to forgive the wife’s infidelity and filed for divorce?

b) forgiven the wife’s infidelity and tried to save the marriage?

c) didn’t give a s~~~, and hoped she would take off with the other man?

The reason I ask this is because among all my reading, I notice that there are a lot of posts from supposed husbands who have forgiven their spouses, gone to counselling, and tried working on fixing their marriages.  All of which lead to a happy ending.  To me infidelity is a deal breaker and she would be out on her ear in five minutes the moment I found out.  So I am beginning to think that many of these Blue Pill husbands who say “Oh honey, you shouldn’t have done that.  I forgive you and I’ll changes to make myself better” are in actual fact Tolls, who post a bunch of bulls~~~ on their web pages to stimulate comment on their columns.  I can not think of any man that I know who would not tell the cheating wife to pack her bags and get the hell out.  Alternatively I would say “Great, you f~~~ed him once, you made your choice.”  Or hope and prey that she takes up with the other guy and finds out that she made a huge mistake and that the grass sure aint greener on the other side of the fence.

 

 

[KeithParticipant 482]

I’m with you, infidelity is a deal breaker if you are in a relationship that is exclusive (such as marriage).  If you are dating and seeing other people, or if its a friends with benefits arrangement, there are no surprises because there is no expectation of exclusivity.

 

 

ONCE UPON A TIME there was a man who never found a wife and he lived happily ever after. The End.

[Anonymous 1]

I agree. That’s one of many reasons I don’t even date. After reading all this material, how I am supposed to trust a woman to be loyal? It is just a matter of time until my hypothetical lawful “girlfriend” f~~~s another buck and then comes back with regrets. It’s disgusting, really. So, if a girlfriend cannot be loyal, am I supposed to MARRY one of these broads? And then get the blame for HER MISTAKES?

Nope, no, not me, not a chance, NO WAY.

[XSDBSParticipant 3598]

Anonymous wrote:

how I am supposed to trust a woman to be loyal?

Unfortunately, you can’t…

[xgreenlanternoxParticipant 253]

XSDBS wrote:

BadKan wrote:

how I am supposed to trust a woman to be loyal?

Unfortunately, you can’t…

Agreed – women are nothing but “upgraders” – the will keep you around long enough until an opportunity to “upgrade” in their eyes comes along. You will then be left in the dust. Plain and simple.

[RusskyParticipant 13503]

I think I would forgive my ex wife for cheating on me (because of our daughter), but she never asked for forgiveness. But that’s fine and understood, and for the better. I knew it was coming, so it wasn’t even a surprize.

By the way, we went to a f~~~ing marriage councelor (before I knew she was cheating), and she was so bats~~~ crazy, that the councelor REFUSED to work with us (he’s like – yeah, try this other guy who could help) – I knew s~~~ was serious right away.

So I was out of country, checking our bank accounts – and I see that she was charging a card at restaurants multiple times – I was like – you didn’t go there by yourself – what’s going on? – nothing – work meetings. Then I log in to her F~~~book account (something I’ve never done before – and she’s flirting with two other guys from work via personal messages. I come back to the US, and she tells me she was fired from her job (AT&T store clerk) for sexual misconduct. I ask her what’s going on – she tried to explain it away by saying: “my boss asked me to hit on this other guy at work so he could fire him for sexual harrasment, but instead – he fired us both” – like I was supposed to believe that. And then I hang out with my friend and he tells me his GF told him that she was BRAGGING to her that she’s cheating on me with two other guys. I confronted her with this at home – and she’s like: “Sure, believe everything your drug-addicted friends tell you”. I threw her out of my house, she had a nerve to still live there, while dressing up as a slut, wait for her (now) husband to pick her up from my house to go to a club and make out in the car while he was parked right in front of my house? I swear I was about to hurt that son of the bitch midget really bad, but thanks God I didn’t.  And then after all of this – she had the nerve to come back to talk, and she says: “I am still not sure whom to pick to stay with – you, this other guy, or the other guy” – like if she was expecting I would try to convince her to stay with me. I said what I had to say- no, bitch, get the f~~~ out- I already made my choice – and you’re not in it.
She never feels sorry for anything she’s done. I expect after the relationship with her new husband is over (and it will be over, if my daughter’s observations hold truth), she might try to act like she made a mistake, but no, thanks, no – I am not taking her back

proud carrier of the 'why?' chromosome

[GrumpyParticipant]

Infidelity.

No forgiveness, gone faster than she could change a tampon

There was a time in my life when I gave a fuck. Now you have to pay ME for it

[experiencedParticipant]

Heard of a private investigator whose customer went back to his EX seven times. The last time by itself cost him $450,000.00.  It’s a no brainer really, zero tolerance.

The Bible gives a free pass to the guy cheated upon.

"It seems like there's times a body gets struck down so low, there ain't a power on earth that can ever bring him up again. Seems like something inside dies so he don't even want to get up again. But he does."

[RoyDalParticipant]

I must be wired up for zero tolerance for infidelity, which is why I quit dating — one reason anyway.

Society asks MGTOWs: Why are you not making more tax-slaves?

[MobycoParticipant 39]

Deal breaker.  Theres no going back and fixing that s~~~.

[EnlightenedMGTOWParticipant 291]

Forgiving your wife for cheating makes you a cuckold.

If you are a cuckold, you are not a MGHOW. End of story.

Marriage is the disease, divorce is the cure. MGTOW is the vaccine.

[Sky-OParticipant 18936]

http://www.womensinfidelity.com

[Won'tGetFooledAgainParticipant 3293]

Sky-O wrote:

http://www.womensinfidelity.com

Describes my (Soon to be ex) wife down to a tee!

I wish I could make her read it so she realises I know it wasn’t my fault!

For women, everything eventually boils down to Alpha Fucks, Beta Bucks.

[RedwolfParticipant 38]

Can’t speak for all men, but in my blue pill days, I weighed an intact home for the kids against the infidelity that I previously stated would be unforgivable.  I incorrectly concluded the intact home was more important.  To be clear, did I trust her, no.  Did I continue to live with her, yes.  Did I make a decision at that point to simply live for the kids only, yes.  In retrospect, hanging on for the kids sake was incredibly stupid and totaling everything up I estimate it cost me roughly a quarter million dollars.

Thank god I found the red pill.

[josh27195Participant 3]

If you think you have been cheated on but are not sure OR you were cheated on and left and now want to be able to trust your new girl but can’t, I suggest a lie detector test you both take.  I also would recommend that you agree up front that you think it will help you trust if you both take one, with each other, once a year.  Not only will then you know you’re not being cheated on, but it acts as a deterrent for both of you should you be tempted.  It’s a lot easier to give into temptation when you think you will never be caught vs. you’re going to get asked the question in front of your SO on a lie detector test.  My wife and I did actually do this when I thought she may have been unfaithful and she agreed to take it.  She had not been unfaithful and since then our relationship has improved considerably.  Obviously not all women will be willing, but a woman who loves you would rather do the test than lose you.
oh and yes, if she cheated, i would absolutely leave… kids or not.  She WILL do it again and will see you as weak for taking her back.

[WarPiggParticipant 21]

OK, here’s my story….married about 25 years, big fight, I move out, four days later she files for divorce. I’m devastated, and spend the next six months trying to reconcile. During this six months we are seeing each other off and on and f~~~ing like rabbits, like we did when we first dated. Fast forward, she agrees to reconcile with the proviso that we seek counseling. I agree, we get back together and then about a month later, as I was on our home computer, I see all this website history of dating sites, Craiglslist, etc. I confront her ( a woman who has always held herself out to be very ethical and moral) and she starts crying and tells me she was just “curious” and NEVER contacted anyone on the dating sites. I, being the suspicious bastard I am, hack her email account that she supposedlyu didn’t have, find communication with multiple men along the lines of ” Going through a divorce sure makes you horny, huh?” I again confront her, she admits to the messages, apologized for lying but states that she NEVER met anyone physically. Further digging finds an email that says ” I enjoyed MEETING you the other night and had fun”. I confront her AGAIN and she starts bawling and tells me nothing happened, she was just titillated but never f~~~ed anyone. I forgave her ( yes, I know…I’m an idiot) because I wanted to be back with her so badly. The next two years seemed almost perfect, we got along, sex was good, the whole nine yards. The for about 3 months, s~~~ reverted back to pre-separation days and out of the blue she says, I want a divorce.’
Fast forward again, we divorced, I’m doing great, she is living in her cousin’s basement and just recently, on a whim, I ran her email address through the hack Ashley Madison thing…and guess what? she had signed up for AM in the middle of those “good times’…
So, here is the moral of the story: NEVER FORGIVE, NEVER FORGET! If she f~~~s around ONCE, she will f~~~ around AGAIN! Guaranteed! I would have been better served to beat feet the SECOND I discovered the web history….saved almost three years of struggle and heartache. F~~~ cheating whores!

[nopegoawayParticipant 14]

Never married, no children. Had a coworker catch his wife fooling around on him. He asked me to be there when he confronted her. Got to watch the beeotch blame him! It was HIS fault she was a cheating whore. When he and I finally were alone, he admitted it was the second time she did it. He asked me what I would do. I couldn’t quit laughing – must have laughed for 20 minutes. I told him he was an idiot for putting up with that crap. We’re no longer friends and he’s still married to it/her – 9 years now. What’s this? (kissing each finger) Foreplay! I don’t have to talk to them when I’m done and fingers don’t get bloody unless you cut them on something – and that “something” ladies, would be called a mans work..

[CatsPawParticipant 423]

Ok… Im not married so this is gonna be a bit from a different perspective, still, I think relevant:

The way I see it, if you are in ANY kind of relationship with a person is because you want to. This SHOULD mean that you care for the other person at a similar level as for yourself. If that would be the case, you would not cheat for two reasons:
A) The pleasure you obtain is short lived.
B) The damage you can do is long lived.

If you are in a long term affair, that means you should not be with your original couple in the first place (assuming you follow the basic rules).
Also note that if you are able to do long term damage to someone for short term pleasure, you really must not care about the other person at all, so.. why stay with them ?

So here is where we get to the most logical conclusion:
Women have affairs instead of leaving males because they get a safe life and they get to f~~~ around (no interest in the relationship).
Men have affairs instead of leaving women because they dont want to lose the kids OR are affraid of change (no interest in the relationship).

So if both men and women dont “seem” to have an interest in long term relationships…. why do we even have them?
Kids.
Sooner or later Women want kids, and they know their looks will suffer as well as they feel the need for a safety net.
So… they will do whatever it takes to get it going. (Im not kidding, anything it takes. Its crazy the degree to what they will go).

But remember, they are not doing that for you, they are doing that because that is what is asked of them.

This is a game that women have been playing with men for centuries, only now with MGTOW we have the rulebook.

Oh and, as A side note, every time I had a Girlfriend, other women were practically asking me to try them for fun.
I was always clear that for me, if I am in a relationship, Its because I want it to work and be good (none of my exes were ever afraid that I would cheat on them, but thy were dead scared that I would “leave” them when they saw me talk with other girls about topics they knew nothing about).

This was the ONLY thing that kept them from leaving me when they got bored, yet I would not cheat on them. Some say its being stupid, I call it integrity in what you believe.

Dont get me wrong, I am not an Idealist, If I was on a boat now and my Ex was drowning Id get her out of the water but not because I want her to be saved, but because I dont want to deal with the corpse.
Nowdays I approach things a lot differently, but sometimes, from time to time, my subconscious still gets me, and for a moment there, I wish I was back with them.
Thats the thing I am scared of. Not them, not feminism, not relationships, but my own stupid mind.

[Dark KenshiParticipant 2132]

There was a time, in my blue pill days, that I would cope with pretty much anything…

Infidelity was always a deal breaker, until she was pregnant.

Then, my kid always came first… But she had a miscarriage, so, cheating was deal breaker again.

But today, in my red pill days, pretty much anything is a deal breaker. Even if we have kids.

My kids will still be my kids, in a LTR or not, so, why would I care about the bitch?

"Young was I once, I walked alone, and bewildered seemed in the way; then I found me another and rich I thought me, for man is the joy of man." Odin, Hàvamàl, stanza 47.

[Deus Ex MachinaParticipant 1068]

For Me personally I took her back for awhile, but I went with my Gut and pretty damn glad I did. I was able to get her email address, and her facebook account, hacked into (thanks to a buddy of mine) after he was able to get Me in. I found emails, pictures, and a s~~~ ton of naked pics from both of them. After that it was a done deal, I called her on the phone and asked for a Divorce. She cried and put on a show of crocodile tears, however it didn’t help at all.

Looking back I should’ve just dumped her ass right then and there, but at the time, and having the blue pill strong in my system, i couldn’t. I am glad i went with my Gut instinct though and found pictures and one video, didn’t help in my favor though the country my Ex Wife is from didn’t honor it.

So it’s like a mental rat trap, no matter where they go, it’ll all be dead ends. Not only that, but Females manipulate the f~~~ out of a guy when faced with serious allegations of infidelity (as long as there is no evidence). However if there’s no evidence then most often times, Women will not even give two s~~~s about their husband, collect child support and/or alimony and bang a bunch of dudes lined up around the block.

"If You have the Tooth of a Whale, You must have the Whale's Jaw to hold it". (i.e. One Must have the right qualifications for leadership) -Hawaiian Proverb

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