How to raise women who aren't "like that"?

Topic by ja391045

Ja391045

Home Forums Philosophy How to raise women who aren't "like that"?

This topic contains 5 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by TheNinjaUWannaH8  TheNinjaUWannaH8 5 years ago.

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  • #11054
    +1
    Ja391045
    ja391045
    Participant
    6

    I’m a father of three, with two, absolutely beautiful girls.  The older one is already getting more attention from boys than she knows what to do with, and it’s seriously affecting her world view.  You know the popular “hot” girl that every girl secretly hated, but wanted to be, and every guy drooled over?   No joke, that is my older daughter.  My younger daughter is still a little bit too young to worry about boys or beauty.

    Have any of you given any thought towards how to pattern the behavior of adolescent women so that they don’t grow up to become, “like that”?   I’m trying my hardest to teach her the value of money,  of a day’s labor, and most importantly, the value of *earning* what she has.   She’s even started looking for a job, but her reasons for gaining a job, “to buy clothes and stuff”, are questionable, so I think what I’m trying to teach is bouncing off.  I can almost hear the ricochets.

    If anyone has given any thoughts towards to what parents can do to raise mentally mature women, who are self reliant, as well as both respectful and independent of men, without being subservient, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

    #15626
    +1
    Eric Lauder
    Eric Lauder
    Participant
    84

    I have a daughter, I’m trying to do it. She’s just only 9 yo.
    I think it’s a desperate try, really.
    Even if she’s good.
    Even if my ex-wife doesn’t identify herself as “feminist” (she also did far more chores than me when we were married – but she had compulsory shopping and hyper-criticism).
    Environment matters – i.e.: google Convention of Istanbul – active discrimination against men – google European Framework Against Intolerance – criminalization of anti-feminism – google Swedish “F!” party – pure misandry with a seat in the European Parliament.
    When she’ll have 15-16 years men will be totally discriminated here, and probably many boys will avoid her, even she’s extremely smart (QI tested two times: 141 and 147) and even beautiful.
    We can’t really blame young girls to take advantage of the situation, and to follow their nature.
    I blame doormats for voting laws that allow females to screw MEN.

    #16086
    +1
    IronSoldier
    IronSoldier
    Participant
    55

    I am in the same boat:  two daughters, ages 8 and 6.  I’ve given this a lot of thought.

    All I can come up with is to emphasize to them how important it is to “extract resources from your environment, not from people you know.”  I think that’s at least a good springboard.

    #16184
    +2
    Antares
    Antares
    Participant
    208

    Disclaimer: I don’t have kids.

    My big issue with women today is that they are spoiled children. It seems strange to think of a woman over 30 years old as a spoiled child, but I’ve seen many many women act just like that, and I think society encourages this. Girls are coddled and exalted, but face almost no repercussions for their actions.

    If your older daughter is attractive and smart, I’m not sure you’ll change her destiny at this point. She has everything she needs to drag boys through s~~~ on a whim. The only thing that will stop her from doing this are what values you’ve instilled in her. I wish I had a sure fire solution to that, but she’ll have to decide for herself if she’ll treat people like garbage because she can, or do “what’s right”.

    Teaching women the value of money is very important and I think you’re actually on the right track. Some women think society just showers them with everything simply because they are women, and they think this way because they’ve never had to work for anything. The fact that she wants to get a job to earn money is great, and I wouldn’t fault her for that. Teens spend money on frivolous crap because they can, but if she knows how much effort it takes to earn a dollar, she’ll naturally gravitate to spending it wisely. If you can, I’d culture her towards saving money. Not all of it, but a person who gets into the habit of setting some aside “for a rainy day” will be far better off in life.

    Critical thinking is a tough thing to teach, especially in this day and age, but I think that’s a key thing I’d teach to any kid. If she has issues, don’t just give your opinion, but instead ask her what she thinks and why. Help her think through her problems instead of telling her what to do, and engage her in conversations about why things are the way they are. Maybe she’ll just throw up the “I don’t know” or “I don’t care” wall, and there’s nothing you can do about that. When you combine critical thinking with “fairness” (values), she’ll understand how to treat people as humans instead of utilities. Many of us didn’t ask for the moon and stars in relationships with women, we just wanted a fair deal. Personality, experiences and chance are major factors too, which you can’t control, but that’s the worry and frustrations of parenting.

    Price is what you pay, value is what you get. -- Ben Graham

    #16265
    +2
    John Doe
    John Doe
    Participant
    743

    Actually, because I don’t have kids, I have given it some thought (in case, whether intentionally or unintentionally, I do have children) ironically.

    I would literally try to get the hell out of western society.  If that is not possible, I would try to enter some religious or social group that did not hold the same values as western society.  However that is not always possible, or can be even worse.

    If neither are possible, then I would try to conquer Western society.  However for some that is not possible.

    I do not want to be the bearer of bad news, but the girl is going to do what the girl is going to do.  Some people say love your daughter no matter what, but that encourages behavior.  Others would reject her, but that leaves her in the hands of the enemy.  If one of you guys can find the medium,  between the two, that would probably be the best answer.

    I knew if I had a daughter during these times, I would be pulling my f~~~ing hair out.

    #16272
    TheNinjaUWannaH8
    TheNinjaUWannaH8
    Participant
    386

    God Bless/’Big Bang’ Bless you guys with Daughters. Whew!

    Despite your best efforts to educate your daughters into self-sufficiency and not being a “Hoedashian”, you all are competing with so many societal forces that constantly program and reinforce Girls into so much Hypermaterialistic, Hypergamic boy-chasing manipulating Bullshiet.

    Just the other day, I overheard two 16 year old girls telling each other that they each deserve “an older boy with muscles who is a bad boy”.  ‘”You would look so good with a muscular guy.”   I guess such an muscular idiot matches her fake-ass Louis Vutton purse.

    Fake Mini-Bitches.

    Hoedom is in the Water, on TV, in the Malls, Magazines.  It’s F~~~in’ Everywhere.

    Nothing we can Do.  The Roof is On Fire.  We don’t need no Water.  Let the Muthaf~~~a Burn.

    Burn Muthaf~~~a. Burn.

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