'Good luck at the gym today.'

[Sky-OParticipant 18936]

Averted a major crisis with a Level XII c~~~ today.

I was walking my dog (that was abandoned years ago by his slut mother when she left to continue riding the c~~~ carousel) near my condo when he unleashed an epic movement on some grass at the edge of an apartment complex.

He’s a winner. And winners get to do what they want. I rarely pick it up. I’ll start picking up after my dog right about when the Federal Reserve stops creating money out of thin air, the global elite stop starting unjust wars and women are held accountable for false rape charges.

Anyway. C~~~ess Maximus got out of a car she was in, running towards me with a plastic bag yelling ‘You need to pick that up!!’ Continually repeating herself and hyperventilating.

I ignored her and she started following me back towards my condo while saying ‘Where do you live? I’ll leave it outside your door if you won’t pick it up!’ I didn’t say anything, kept walking and when I looked back she was still following me and filming with her phone, holding it up.

While being stalked, I decided not to go to my condo since she would know where I lived and I couldn’t walk to my Jeep since the reserved parking space has my unit number on it. So I checked my pocket and had the key to my Ford Ranger that I leave in a visitor spot.

Still ignoring her while she was trying to force a plastic bag of my dog’s feces into my hand while she filmed her cinematic directorial debut.

Finally got to my truck and when I got in I said ‘Good luck at the gym today.’ And she looked confused and asked what that meant. I told her that due to the extra fat around her waist and legs it was obvious she should be working out regularly to get rid of it.

And then her expression changed, her eyes were full of rage and she said she was calling the police and I saw her making a call.

The police department is about a mile from my place and I knew I had to go tactical so I took off and drove there.

What do you know? Right when I started telling the lady at the main window that I was followed and harassed by a nutjob that was filming me, another lady in dispatch said they had her on the phone right then and she said I had ‘threatened’ her, etc.

A cop came out of a door to talk to me and all of a sudden, not picking up after my dog wasn’t an issue anymore in lieu of snowflake having called in about threats and being ‘scared’.

Entire situation defused and resolved by the 72 year old guy that lives next to me also calling in to tell them she was the instigator when he saw everything from his deck and literally heard her conversation on the phone lying when she made the call from the parking lot.

[Anonymous 43]

stay the f~~~ away, do not speak to these c~~~s. just ignore.

[JVBParticipant]

Well handled Sky 0. Good on ya !! I guarantee you that is one miserable bitch that can’t stand the look of herself in the mirror. Funny how the c~~~ can tell a bold face lie to a police officer yet nothing happens to her. She’s probably still fuming lol.

Peace is > piece.

[Anonymous 54]

Fat bitches dont get a good f~~~ing.It makes them grumpy.
I wish they could uninvent cell phones, with cameras. Its the one thing that gives them dispraportiinal power. Us old farts remember the days when women were on there own out there.No cell phone.No cops to instintly call, no following you around filming you. They didnt dare act like this.Its good that they should be somewhat afraid of us. Why? Because they would need GOOD Men to look out for them. They cant tell whos who, so they had to mind their manners around us. How I miss those days. Dont let f~~~ing c~~~s shame you into thinking its bad on you if their afraid of us.
Can you hear how quiet there becomeing now that there getting over their post election rage? There scared.
I personaly like it that way. Bitches better start acting nice again.

[ILiveAgainParticipant]

I would have run and if she followed … keep running till she had to stop.

Then I’d stop and shout encouragement like a personal trainer.

Rinse and repeat.

Can you imagine the conversation with the police as she’s loaded in the ambulance.

A camera phone and loud mouth …. doesn’t stop you being an out of shape whale.

[WallyParticipant]

ILiveAgain wrote:

I would have run and if she followed … keep running till she had to stop.

Then I’d stop and shout encouragement like a personal trainer.

Rinse and repeat.

Can you imagine the conversation with the police as she’s loaded in the ambulance.

A camera phone and loud mouth …. doesn’t stop you being an out of shape whale.

I think your on to something here, perhaps a whole new fitness fad.

Sky-O wrote:

Finally got to my truck and when I got in I said ‘Good luck at the gym today.’ And she looked confused and asked what that meant. I told her that due to the extra fat around her waist and legs it was obvious she should be working out regularly to get rid of it.

Freaking awesome!

"what a waste of a life, to marry, give up your freedom, just for the hope of not dying alone. Don't get married Son."

[PistolPeteParticipant 27143]

You were very lucky—normally the police buy into whatever the snowflake is selling. I must say however that I really enjoyed your post. I’m sure the two things that infuriated her the most was:

a) You declined to allow her exertion of power/control over you

b) Her lying/manipulation failure again undermined her power

You successfully yanked the fangs right out of the serpents mouth!

[DorkShitParticipant 4353]

Rethink the picking dog s~~~ up.

She went self righteous indignation on you. Avoid that s~~~. If it means you have to pick your dog’s s~~~ up then picking that s~~~ up might be best….

Peace brothers

[KeymasterKeymaster]

Terrific example. I can’t stand when women try to “police” anything, and they do it all the time.

• “you can’t do that!”
• “you can’t say that!”
• “Oh don’t think that!”
• “You can’t wear white after Labor Day!”

It’s not even rare. It’s an epidemic.

On dogs, I love them, but women are kinder to dogs then they are to other people. That’s just whack insane. Not to mention how she will happily pick up dog s~~~, but when a man leaves a towel on the floor, she will police that too and charge you with a felony.

On dog s~~~…. did we lose a war? Nature already decided that dogs (and animals) are not supposed to have their s~~~ picked up after them, and anyone who DOES is actually being extra considerate of others. You don’t go running after them because they don’t.

I lived in Amsterdam for almost 2 years and it’s “good luck” to step in dog s~~~ there. Not kidding. Right in the middle of the city, there are dog turds all around. Someone bending over to pick up a dog s~~~ would be so laughable. The rain also washes it away all the time.

If it rains regularly, I would never pick up a dog s~~~. And if I did, it would be in a park with lots of people around – purely out of consideration for other people. Not because a c~~~ ran after me to tell me I’m “supposed” to.

Women are no better at picking up after their dogs when they are “supposed” to – I see it all the f~~~ing time – and they are not in a position to lecture anyone. When I don’t see a woman pick up after her dog, I keep my thoughts to myself. She wouldn’t, because she’s a woman.

===================

And I’m also really enjoying your posts lately.
On this exact topic, I’m gonna leave you with a very similar story
– By UnleashTheBeef

Flagrant c~~~s amuse me.

This couldn’t have happened at a more appropriate time, considering last week’s post on Michael Vick. The following is a play by play of what transpired last night while taking my dog out. The whole “event” lasted about five minutes, but surely created a lifetime of memories for one lucky, completely insane woman.

At about 8:00 p.m. I take my dog out for a sprint session where I ride my bike and he runs with me on a leash. This works out well, since he is a high-energy fella and can sprint faster than I can ride. I ride at a walking pace until we get down around the corner and onto a long straight section of bike trail that runs alongside the road. It’s great having this trail system as it makes it easy to take the dog out where he can sprint in the grass while I’m biking on the pavement.

I come to South Four Mile Run Dr, and stop at the crosswalk, as it’s a busy four-way intersection (see it). I need to cross five lanes of traffic on S. Four Mile Run to get on the bike trail that runs along the other side of the street. I’ll sprint my dog down the trail and back – the daily routine. Only tonight, as I’m waiting for the walk signal, I notice some middle-aged woman on my right in her white SUV, about to make a left-hand turn (across the crosswalk I’m waiting to cross) onto S. Four Mile Run, yapping out her window toward me. So I pull out my earphones to find out what she could possibly be flapping her gums about with such an angry look on her face. As I do, I catch the tail end of her saying something along the lines of:

“…you shouldn’t be doing that to your dog – it’s not safe and it’s illegal bla bla bla bla!!!”

Remember, this is a busy intersection, with multi-lane roads and lots of foot/bike/illegal Guatemalan traffic – it’s a bustling area with people everywhere, going about their routine and minding their business. At this point, she is reprimanding me from the window of her SUV, sitting at a green light holding up traffic. Realizing that she is being a nosy, bossy c~~~, I simply reply:

“I know I’m very handsome – just focus on the road, sweetheart.”

After this, she begins to make her left hand turn and proclaims out her window:

“That’s it – I’m following you!”

Can you imagine… wait… can you f~~~ing imagine a middle-aged woman shouting this out her window at some unknown guy on the corner of the street? Unbelievable right?

So, I could only reply with:

“I’m not really into older women, but ok!”

At this point, she turns left onto S. Four Mile Run but continues to make an extreme left/quasi-U-turn all the way back across three lanes of oncoming traffic and into the corner gas station. She doesn’t know which way I plan on going yet, but in her blind rage, I see her frantically open her cell phone, undoubtedly to dial 911 – because… clearly… this is an emergency. How dare I exercise my own dog against this strange, desperate, possibly psychotic woman’s will?

I begin laughing, and continue on, crossing the road and turning left down the trail as this raving maniac pulls back onto S. Four Mile Run facing the opposite direction I’m now traveling. As I head away, I hear her screaming and honking her horn in traffic as she tries to will her way through a suicidal U-turn that will put her back on my tail. I pause to see if she’ll execute the U-turn and come after me, but she can’t get through traffic so I carry on with my dog and we speed our way down the trail.

Then it gets awesome.

A few minutes later, as I wind down our speed and turn around, along comes nutso in her white SUV – only this time she’s accompanied by two police cruisers. At this point, the whole event is so comical to me that I can’t possibly smile any wider. As c~~~-face and the cops slow to a stop, I happily head back in their direction. I yank my earphones out and roll toward them – she’s pulled along the curb and the two cops are beside her in the next lane. I hear her yelling and screaming and see her motioning wildly in my direction. As she’s carrying on displaying her mental illness, I hear the cop in the cruiser directly next to her say, “M’am, what do you want us to do? I don’t think there’s anything illegal about that.” It’s clear that I could just roll on by, minding my business, and that the cops have no intention of saying a word to me, since I’m not doing anything “illegal” and they’re obviously displeased with this woman for making them respond to such a ludicrous call – but that wouldn’t maximize the potential entertainment value of the situation. So, I pull up to her passenger side window and say:

“Sweetie, I’m headed back to my place now if you wanna follow me over…”

This statement just about institutionalizes her, and she cries:

“You should be thrown in jail for what you are doing! Do you see what he’s doing??? The dog! The poor dog! How are you going to let him get away with this?!?!”

The cops continue sitting motionless in their cruisers, clearly unmoved by the situation, and cop number one responds again, “M’am, there’s nothing wrong here, people can walk their dogs however they want to, I’m sorry-”

“What?!?!?! NO!!! This is ILLEGAL! It is INHUMANE!”

Then, redirecting her attention toward me, screaming out of her mind:

“How would YOU like it if I leashed YOU up and dragged YOU all over town? This is BULLS~~~!!!!!”

To which I respond, calmly and happily:

“Well darlin’, I ain’t got all night… get the leash and let’s make it happen.”

At this point, she is literally so beat-red, so livid, with so much spit flying out of her ugly know-it-all face, that her wailing becomes completely unintelligible. I don’t know, either, if the cops can’t hear what I’m saying due to the traffic flowing by, or if they’re just enjoying my humiliation of this woman, but they don’t move an inch or say a word. I thought for sure that I’d provoke her to exit the vehicle and assault me, but she didn’t take the bait. Realizing that she had reached her full-throttle red-zone and had nowhere else to go, I cut off her shrieking by saying:

“Listen, we could talk all night but that ain’t cuttin’ it so I’m just gonna have my little canine friend here lap peanut butter off my sack ‘til about midnight.”

Reaching her loudest point, she screams at the cop:

“DID YOU HEAR THAT?!? DID YOU HEAR THAT?!?”

At which point I leaned into the window and whispered soothingly:

“Don’t worry, it’s chunky style.”

Then, as my dog sat by obediently, I simply put my earphones back in, cued Billy Ocean back up, and rolled on up the road, giving cop number two an affirmative nod and receiving a tip of the cap as I pulled away. I’ll admit; I hoped she would appear again, but the reality is she would have just run me over at that point, so I’m better off that she didn’t.

Not to get too political or philosophical here, but angry, rotten, overcompensating asst~~~s like this woman are the reason civilization sucks, and you can’t drive without a seatbelt, walk while chewing gum, or kick people in the nuts for no reason without getting arrested. Stupid, know-it-all, protect-you-from-yourself toxic c~~~s that want to enforce their feelings on you for your (or your f~~~ing pet’s) own good. I know they’re fun to make asses of, but still – go eat a dick, would you?

The moral of the story, as always: Mind your business or I’ll make my dog lick peanut butter off of my nuts.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[Anonymous 24]

Sky-O wrote:

I’ll start picking up after my dog right about when the Federal Reserve stops creating money out of thin air, the global elite stop starting unjust wars and women are held accountable for false rape charges.

+100

[Author]

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