Getting Old

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

In my 40s now, starting to get little niggles everywhere. The joys of getting old. I have wrote a poem about it.
DISSOLVING

Diminished eyesight, need glasses, foul bowl smelling gasses, can’t see in dim light

Need a hearing aid, too old and bald to get laid

Liver eroded, irritable bowel syndrome, arse exploded

Bone density of a sparrow, bone marrow, no longer produces red blood cell, lost a sense of taste and smell

Body and facial hair gone white, skin no longer tight, lost a few centimetres in height, prescribed medication, high as a kite

Lost muscle mass, age crept on, soon be getting a free bus pass, moaning about this, moaning about that, language so crass

Penis no longer hard, body the shape of a tub of lard, lost neurons, mind of a retard

Broken tooth enamel, hunch-back, hump of a camel, ugly bastard, cover my face with a moist flannel

Trembling fingers, body odour lingers, only attract pros, ho’s and ugly mingers

Despairs, can no longer manage the stairs, wears old man’s attire, 30more years to the age of retire, get more breathless as I step higher and higher

Install a lift, with a free gift, of a walk-in bath, turtle neck, length of a giraffe

Can’t recall my own name, trip and fall, fill in a form, make an accident claim

In a hospital bed, barely functioning, as good as dead. At the side, a bed pan, smiley nurse named Ann, used to be a man, called Stan. Sudden heart attack, positioned on the back, adrenaline shot, body no longer hot, placed in a mortuary rack

At the funeral no-one to care, only one person there. The pedo priest, a perverted beast, who recites the holy book, good luck, rest in pieces, lets hope you don’t burn and cook

[It’sallbsParticipant]

Let’s here it then -I’m 41.

http://www.leavemeansleave.eu

[DanceMyOwnWayParticipant 2097]

Snap!

If you fall down 7 times, get up 8

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Colin Combover in a Coma wrote:

In my 40s now, starting to get little niggles everywhere. The joys of getting old.

I had to google the bolded.

Tell me about it. I’m about to turn the big 4 0 . It’s just another mile stone, but I’m not too man to admit it that it does have me thinking.

Didn’t read your poem – I’m just not into poetry. It’s not you, it’s me.

Regardless, yeah the experience of life is warped. I tell myself – ’40 isn’t that old’. But, then I recall back to the days of my early 20’s and recall using 35 as the age which was quote/unquote ‘old’.

Bleh, just another mile stone I suppose. The biggest irony is when your a child you think adults have all of the answers, but once you become the age of the mature adult, you realize you simply have more questions.

It’s something every human has experienced throughout all of history. I wish that last sentiment helped, but it doesn’t really.

Resident cynic.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

Colin Combover in a Coma wrote:

In my 40s now, starting to get little niggles everywhere. The joys of getting old.

I had to google the bolded.

Tell me about it. I’m about to turn the big 4 0 . It’s just another mile stone, but I’m not too man to admit it that it does have me thinking.

Didn’t read your poem – I’m just not into poetry. It’s not you, it’s me.

Regardless, yeah the experience of life is warped. I tell myself – ’40 isn’t that old’. But, then I recall back to the days of my early 20’s and recall using 35 as the age which was quote/unquote ‘old’.

Bleh, just another mile stone I suppose. The biggest irony is when your a child you think adults have all of the answers, but once you become the age of the mature adult, you realize you simply have more questions.

It’s something every human has experienced throughout all of history. I wish that last sentiment helped, but it doesn’t really.

I am just trying to get through life as quickly as possible, 200years ago I would be emulsified by now.

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Jesus, I just read a bit of your poem…

From the description you must be way past 40 or your living in fu$King Cambodia and are malnourished.

WTF lol…

Resident cynic.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

Jesus, I just read a bit of your poem…

From the description you must be way past 40 or your living in fu$King Cambodia and are malnourished. WTF lol…

Read it all, absorb it, and imprint it onto your cerebellum.

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

I am just trying to get through life as quickly as possible, 200years ago I would be emulsified by now.

Read it all, absorb it, and imprint it onto your cerebellum.

Hahaha! Reading your username and reading the posts above, put a broad smile on my face, and an audible laugh.

I love this guy <—no sarcasm, I truly do.

Resident cynic.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

I am just trying to get through life as quickly as possible, 200years ago I would be emulsified by now.

Read it all, absorb it, and imprint it onto your cerebellum.

Hahaha! Reading your username and reading the posts above, put a broad smile on my face, and an audible laugh.

I love this guy <—no sarcasm, I truly do.

Cheers mate! I am an artist, I need constant validation, probably stems from the fact I wasn’t breastfed.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

I am just trying to get through life as quickly as possible, 200years ago I would be emulsified by now.

Read it all, absorb it, and imprint it onto your cerebellum.

Hahaha! Reading your username and reading the posts above, put a broad smile on my face, and an audible laugh.

I love this guy <—no sarcasm, I truly do.

You forgot to put, “no homo” at the end

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

You forgot to put, “no homo” at the end

Freudian slip? 😉 haha!

Resident cynic.

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Seriously speaking though,

I’m glad you brought this up because I’m about to turn 40 and I’ve been thinking about this. 40 is when we are literally considered “old” isn’t it?

Guys thoughts and experience on this?

Younger guys?

What about the guys who are 40+ : was turning 40 a mile stone of sorts for you?

I’m officially of the age where the girls I’m most attracted to could technically be my daughters lol.

Resident cynic.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

You forgot to put, “no homo” at the end

Freudian slip? 😉 haha!

I’ve exposed you, like I exposed those two finches that were giving it the big one the other day. Can’t you sleep, it is 5am in Tennessee?

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

Seriously speaking though,

I’m glad you brought this up because I’m about to turn 40 and I’ve been thinking about this. 40 is when we are literally considered “old” isn’t it?

Guys thoughts and experience on this?

Younger guys?

What about the guys who are 40+ : was turning 40 a mile stone of sorts for you?

I’m officially of the age where the girls I’m most attracted to could technically be my daughters lol.

It is not classed as old now, only because we are living later. Regress back a couple hundred years, or live in some tin-pot country, 40 would be considered old. I think once you get into your fifties, that is old. Here in the UK, after 50, you send a piece of your turd off in the post for analysis…..

[Anonymous 54]

Say hi to Nusre Ann!

Ask her if , she misses Stan

Was life better, as a Man?

[Anonymous 0]

Good poem in the OP. I’m in my sixties, and I was laughing as I read the poem. Really enjoyed it.

In my sixties, I’m mainly just fighting off the twinges. I still keep fit and healthy, but it takes a lot of work. Lots of stretching and warming up knees and shoulders and other joints just so I can do a decent workout at the gym.

But other than that, no complaints.

[Colin Combover in a ComaParticipant 5088]

Anonymous wrote:

Say hi to Nusre Ann!

Ask her if , she misses Stan

Was life better, as a Man?

Good news, she has just become a Gran. Her daughter Leanne, just gave birth to a boy named Dan.

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

Colin Combover in a Coma wrote:

It is not classed as old now

But, you said your in your 40’s and you feel the same way, no (?).

I’m not being cheeky/sarcastic here, this is legitimate and sincere.

I seriously am starting to feel old.

Aren’t you in your 40’s and hence your original post?

Resident cynic.

[It’sallbsParticipant]

Ancientwisdom wrote:

What about the guys who are 40+ : was turning 40 a mile stone of sorts for you?

Not really it’s just another birthday.

http://www.leavemeansleave.eu

[AncientwisdomParticipant 6089]

It’sallbs wrote:

Ancientwisdom wrote:

What about the guys who are 40+ : was turning 40 a mile stone of sorts for you?

Not really it’s just another birthday.

I know, I wish I felt that way. But it feels like another mile stone to me.

How old are you man?

Resident cynic.

[Author]

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