His best option is to go to a Families Need Fathers meeting immediately.
It’s a UK based charity and their website is here and lists local meetings where he can get free advice from lawyers who specialise in helping father’s and their children maintain a relationship:
https://fnf.org.uk/
The first issue will be whether he has ‘Parental Responsibility’ that will depend on whether he was married or if he is named on the birth certificate.
The best approach to adopt is to remain child focused and do what’s best for your child. The court will apply the welfare criteria which is:
the ascertainable wishes and feelings of the child concerned (considered in the light of his age and understanding);
his physical, emotional and educational needs;
the likely effect on him of any change in his circumstances;
his age, sex, background and any characteristics of his which the court considers relevant;
any harm which he has suffered or is at risk of suffering;
how capable each of his parents, and any other person in relation to whom the court considers the question to be relevant, is of meeting his needs;
Try and sort it out in mediation, it will look good on you.
If you have any contact with your ex for handovers of the child do it in a public place where there is cctv. record all conversations with her but only use those recordings to protect yourself i.e. for police purposes if she makes false allegations against you. if she gets the police involved record them. there is clear evidence of police domestic violence units being corrupt and fabricating evidence, coaching females on what to say and arresting males unlawfully.
Keep communication to a method where there is an audit trial such as text or email. Don’t get into talking about reconciling. Keep it matter of fact and on the child. don’t send chaser texts or emails. simply sending 2 texts or emails will be treat as harassment.
You need to avoid her getting a non molestation order at all costs. the less communication with her the better. sort it out through mediation and then get a solicitor to get it turned into a court order.
If Cafcass become involved, record them. There is evidence of them being corrupt too.
If she is trying to blackmail you or threaten you over contact (which you say she is, that’s domestic abuse. contact a charity called mankind initiative.)
If she shouts at you or raises her voice against you in any way or has been violent against you in the past visit your doctor and note it on your medical records.
Keep a hardbound diary every day and one where you cant just pull the pages out. if it goes to court you will need a contemporaneous note of everything that’s happened. that diary will become your evidence and help you a lot.
If you decide to pay a lawyer be aware that the first hearing will be a dispute resolution hearing. It is not a contested hearing so the court can not make an order unless you and your ex both agree. if your short of money it may be worth saving the lawyer for the final contested hearing. another option is a McKenzie friend who will help you at court and is a lot cheaper. some people are using McKenzie friends and then just a lawyer for final contested hearing if necessary.
The judges are pretty fair.
It’s the corrupt police and cafcass you have to watch out for to stop them misleading the court. you need an audit trial of everything
If you have recording, the way to get them in as evidence is to type them up as a transcript.
Save up all your evidence for a final contested hearing and then ambush her with it.
Anonymous 3 years, 10 months ago.
