Better late than never

[YounglukeParticipant 31]

Hello,

I’m working on my third divorce now. I started to draft this almost as a resume of my failed marriages, but I prefer to take inventory of where I messed up, and then move on. So instead I’ll start with what I think makes me who I am.

I have two sons. One from my first marriage when I was 19, and my youngest from my second marriage when I was 29. Except for about four years total I had full custody of my oldest son. My youngest son I got 50/50 custody after the divorce, but now have about 70% custody of him.

My first two marriages/divorces were not horrible ordeals. In fact, I had some pretty good times there after and found motivation from my first son to get sorted professionally. With the lessons learned from my second marriage, I learned how to be a more connected father.

I’m sure everyone sees what is coming next, with no real punch in the face from the first two, I got married again. This time, however, I found a sexy little covert narcissist with a domestic violence track record. Score!

Sadly all the signs were there, and I broke it off at one point, but let myself get sucked in. Over the next six years, it was a lot of couples therapy, bobbing and weaving, but for the most part, I stayed true to myself and didn’t let her beat me into submission.

Until one day when a driver wanted to see a real life Superman and decided to sideswipe me while I’m riding my motorcycle on the freeway doing about 50 Mph. Luckily I flew into a construction area instead of into oncoming traffic. Damn, this was three years ago now, and this s~~~ still sucks to talk about. Summarize with many broken bones (vertebrae, ribs, etc.), torn muscles in my arm and shoulder and a year of recovery.

The wife was accommodating after my accident, but she could only maintain this for about three weeks. Ok, going to fast forward to about two months ago, and just assume the next three years included depression, anxiety, nightmares, verbal, emotional and physical abuse until about two months ago she said she was done and wanted a divorce.

Now though, luck was on my side. This was the motivation I needed to get back to being who I was. Initially, I did the white knight thing and focused on the things that would make me strong again and would possibly save the marriage, but I was also laser focused on putting myself first and then my youngest son still living with me. Next I came across various men’s rights forums, watched the movie The Red Pill, focused on creating and growing the friendships with my male friends (she was isolating me from them I now see), and connecting again with my dad (isolated from him by my feminist mother).

So that is me, still in the negotiating process on the divorce. I know it will suck, but I feel I have advantages to leverage and will survive it. I see an excellent future with my son’s as my focus, lots of time and energy for my hobbies, and adventures with my friends.

This growing movement, site, and my friends saved my life and helped to get me in a better place to get over this next speed bump, before I move on to greater things, for the “gods to delight in me.”

[Anonymous 7]

Welcome. Beers are in the cooler.
Good luck with your battle in family court.

[LEO THE WISEParticipant 249]

Why getting married so many times … OMG, should learn from the bad experiences a little !!

Anyway, it’s never too late to take the right way : YOUR OWN WAY.

Nothing is lost until the end so still some hope to get your life back on track.

Leo the wise : Giving to all men their needed uprise My MGTOW YOUTUBE channel, first vid : https://youtu.be/Xt-tJgVUGuI

[Anonymous 13]

When you come out the other side of this you will have peaceful bliss.

Welcome.

[YounglukeParticipant 31]

Anonymous wrote:

Welcome. Beers are in the cooler.
Good luck with your battle in family court.

Thanks. I have no kids with my third wife, so we just need to sort out the division of shared assets and possible alimony. I have a strong case for that to be little or none though, but will still take all the luck I can get.

One smart thing I did after the second divorce was to get a vasectomy.

[YounglukeParticipant 31]

LEO THE WISE wrote:

Why getting married so many times … OMG, should learn from the bad experiences a little !!

Very true, everyone has a different bottom though. I’ve hit mine though, so lessons have been learned now.

Anonymous wrote:

When you come out the other side of this you will have peaceful bliss.

I can’t wait, I’m already starting to feel fantastic and feel like a kid waiting for Christmas in anticipation of how much more fantastic it will feel when I come out the other side.

Thanks

[OldBillParticipant]

Three marriages?

Jesus…

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[YounglukeParticipant 31]

OldBill wrote:

Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

Stealing this

[bstoffParticipant 4863]

Welcome.
I hope you’ve finally learned your lesson.
It took me a while to learn, too.

I hope you will be able to protect your injury settlement, if you got one and haven’t spent it already. A good divorce lawyer will go to the trouble of helping with that if it gets them paid more, of course.

[Anonymous 6]

Hey Bud, I’m glad that you’re here! Think of this place as one giant dining hall in a medieval castle. Nothing but warriors crowd this hall and sit down as equals at long tables and talk about the battles that they’ve fought outside of the castle walls. The warriors here support each other and help to mentor the squires who populate our corridors. So grab some beer from the wench, a large turkey leg or two, and join in the comradery that only brothers can know. I salute you sir, you’ve earned a place among the valiant!

[Anonymous 0]

I’m glad you survived all of that! You seem like a strong and pragmatic dude.
Got a question from what you wrote though, why the hell would you have to pay alimony if you don’t have any children in common? When my parents got divorced my father had to pay about 1000€ to my mother for about 2 years straight, but that was it, it wasn’t permanent. (I have a small sister as well and my dad got about 8 times more money than my mother) Do you guys have to pay alimony forever if you divorce in the US?

[SandalsParticipant 4253]

Youngluke wrote:

so we just need to sort out the division of shared assets and possible alimony.

Protect yourself. Sounds like you have a psychopath on your hands. Don’t look for reason and logic – they enjoy the insanity they rope you into.

[AttonParticipant]

It took 3 dang.

A MGTOW is a man who is not a woman's bitch!

[OldschoolParticipant 2481]

Good to have you here. welcome aboard.

Get a vasectomy.

[YounglukeParticipant 31]

Anonymous wrote:

Got a question from what you wrote though, why the hell would you have to pay alimony if you don’t have any children in common?

Alimony in my state starts out based on a simple calculation based on how much each person makes and how long you were together. In then gets subjective when they add in variables such as the health of each person, have their skills sets grown or diminished, and if there was any domestic violence to name a few.

I make about twice as much as she does, but since we’ve been together her income has increased 80%, while mine has decreased 30%. that and other factors like the domestic violence make me feel confident I will have to pay little to no alimony and for a short period of time. I’m also asking myself, what little bit extra am I willing to pay to get it all done and for her to be out of my life.

Sandals wrote:

Don’t look for reason and logic

Hello no, I’m going hard core Art of War on her ass. She tried to use sex the other day to rope me in, I didn’t go for it and shut her down. That felt awesome!

Every day I read the following as a reminder “She f~~~ed you, she f~~~ed you on purpose. She won’t hesitate to destroy you, she is already trying to. No quarter should be given. You’re fighting for your life.

[CaregiverParticipant 101]

Welcome to the community!

[Author]

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