A ROUGH DRAFT of my next article and looking for feedback.
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Patriarchy and Toxic Relationships
Young men intent on meeting a mate, pair bonding with an equal partner or eventually marrying the love of his life will find obstacles between him and the adored happiness we all seek. Many will end up relinquishing their hopes of equality with their lover as Gloria Steinman explains when she wrote, “Society certainly encourages women to be victims every way.” Women being described as social victims and even chattel is taught at college level women’s and gender studies coursework that describes the patriarchy as an institutionalized and societal male domination over women. These teachings show students how the world of men debases women with objectification, power and authority.
With such a burden placed on women it is not hard to understand many women develop a hint of anger or contempt towards men that easily leads to revengeful visions and fantasies. A women’s soccer team winning by a large margin over the men’s team chanting “Girls rule and boys drool”.
Female empowerment is often expressed as resentful ideations where girls overpower the boys. It becomes a lust for power, encouraging “girl power” push back against male authority.
People often butt heads with authority figures as J K Rowling said, “Authority figures attract trouble” and Vivek Wadhwa said a “Key ingredient to innovation is the ability to challenge authority and break rules”. Patriarchy theory sets up an all-male authoritarian social hierarchy, prophesizing women’s desire to challenge male authority with relished thoughts of retaliation against us men, as patriarchal overloads. This theory or fact sets men and women on a relationship battle ground as combatants rather than teammates and is a catalyst for women to have violent fantasies of dominating their men. Men should be aware that the playing field of love and marriage can be a field of gendered adversaries where equality is rare.
Some do not believe there is a patriarchy, others demand that a controlling patriarchy seeks to oppress women. Billionaires, the 1% own all the worlds assets, businesses and employee’s so there is no place or society that is not an subordinate of patriarchy, aside a few matriarchal villages in Africa, everything is patriarchy. There is nothing but patriarchy. No matter if it is patriarchy, certainly something has shaped the nature of relationships between the sexes because there is truth to the phrase, “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.” No one is angrier than a woman who has the perception of being rejected in love.
Most women will establish their fulcrum of male antipathy and adjust it somewhere on a sliding continuum starting with cautions distrust, passing through resentment and extending to hatred. Young men in love are surely in danger. Men are often as being toxic towards their girl with controlling, aggressing and violent behavior and must find ways to calm down the anger. But can guys manage the romantic battel field of divergent combatants with their girl and reach a win-win situation.
Repeating another Gloria Steinman phrase, “The truth will set you free, but first it will p~~~ you off.” That statement is appropriate for all young men today knowing that an ancient patriarchy has likely damaged his loving partner. You might be p~~~ed off to know that the result is men will always be seen with distrust, disgust and begrudging hate.
For men, we might notice early signs of a problematic partner; crossing arms over her chest and never allowing you to take the upper hand in a conversation. She may always demand the last word in an argument. She might wave his ideas away, spin around in a huff and leave the room or stomp up/down the stairs. These are signs of indignation. If you notice these behaviors don’t act out your masculine violence because there are alternatives.
Young men should take head because choosing a partner can destroy each of your lives and futures. Assuming the primordial patriarchy has prejudiced women with resentment toward you, there is no need to bear the brunt of her wrath forever. Men have options:
ONE: A negotiated relationship. Even though divorce rates are sky-high, 40% to 50%, and four out of every ten couples who remain married state they are unhappy , there are couples who manage to work through gender power issues. Premarital counseling is perfect for couples who become serious about a future together.
TWO: Wealth can satiates all. Billionaires appear have resources that keep wives in a nonstop state of luxury and the couple most likely doesn’t see each other enough to experience endless conflict. Sadly, being this wealthy is not likely for most young men.
THREE: Subjegate yourself. Knowing your girl has thousand walls built to defend against male oppression and if we break one wall, then we’ve offended and must sustain an angered tongue lashing or worse. We should never fight back because we must be considerate of each and every emotional need she conjures up. We must walk on egg shells allowing her to test the measure of our love, making certain we humbly tells her that she is pretty, has beautiful hair, is not fat, her butt’s not big and she smell good.
FOUR: Stand up for yourself. Every time you speak over your girl or take the upper hand, your girls’ sliding scale of mistrust will slide further towards hatred. You are destined for the vengeance that only a woman can unleash. The divorce will be a living hell. You will lose.
FIVE: Go your own way. Become part of an ever growing mass of men who find the modern world is incredible for men. There is a men’s liberation awareness circling the planet called MGTOW, Red Pill and Herbivore Men, that is unleashing freedom, empowering men to define their unique individual path to follow.
It is a new day for men, knowledge and freedom are at our fingertips. We can design our most passionate life we’ve only been able to dream of in our past. Drop the patriarchal expectations for marriage and forge a life of purpose for you, your community and those you love most.
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Tim Patten 3 years, 10 months ago.
