Amy Schumer's Netflix Disaster

[OldBillParticipant]

Can you imagine what that leather cat suit smelled like after they peeled her out of it?

… shudder…

I’ve never seen her act and, after seeing her as a guest on Seinfeld’s Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, I’m certain I never will see her act. While some of those episodes are better than others, Schumer’s was tedious. She was on screen for maybe 12 out of fifteen minutes and that was still too much.

Some of Seinfeld’s guests are relentlessly funny, like Norm MacDonald, some are introspective, like the late Gary Shandling, and some are fascinating, like Lorne Michaels. Most are interesting in some fashion. The various women Seinfeld interviews are provide the weakest episodes, naturally, and Schumer is easily the worst of that sorry lot.

It’s a good thing her “act” features her vagina so prominently because the only reason she has what little career she has is because of “vagina”.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[phoenixgod1995Participant 3352]

Yeah, I bet they had to powerwash that f~~~ing “trash bag” around her body.

Marriage and Divorce for a man is like getting a cactus shoved up your ass. It’s painful with all the spines that go in and it is painful getting all the spines out, meanwhile Wifey gets most of the money, your home, your kids, and practically everything you own.

[RumpoleParticipant 994]

She’s been plowed more than Iowa.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

The huge poster billboard is a picture of her laying on the floor face down with her face looking away from the camera.

Is she “funny”?

She’s not even a “stand up” comedian.

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[phoenixgod1995Participant 3352]

Keymaster wrote:

The huge poster billboard is a picture of her laying on the floor face down with her face looking away from the camera.

Is she “funny”?

She’s not even a “stand up” comedian.

I wonder why Netflix devoted so much money to her. You don’t see them doing that with Gabriel Iglesias or Bill Burr, comedians with actual talent!

Marriage and Divorce for a man is like getting a cactus shoved up your ass. It’s painful with all the spines that go in and it is painful getting all the spines out, meanwhile Wifey gets most of the money, your home, your kids, and practically everything you own.

[KeymasterKeymaster]

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

I wonder why Netflix devoted so much money to her.

Because she’s the perfect feminist slut train wreck icon. Fat. Unattractive. Fills her “act” with garbage. STARRED in a movie called “train wreck”. Jokes about being a pedophile in the first 45 seconds. SARCASITIC AS F~~~ and women love that because they think looking petulant and brackish makes them look “interesting” when she really has nothing to offer.

Not even talent!! She can’t even do an imitation – or a voice of a famous person.

She’s just . . . . . bad.
That’s what she’s celebrated for.

Feminists get a real kick out of being bad, unfunny, untalented, and providing zero value. Not even entertainment value!

If you keep doing what you've always done... you're gonna keep getting what you always got.

[phoenixgod1995Participant 3352]

Keymaster wrote:

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

I wonder why Netflix devoted so much money to her.

Because she’s the perfect feminist slut train wreck icon. Fat. Unattractive. Fills her “act” with garbage. STARRED in a movie called “train wreck”. Jokes about being a pedophile in the first 45 seconds. SARCASITIC AS F~~~ and women love that because they think looking petulant and brackish makes them look “interesting” when she really has nothing to offer.

Not even talent!! She can’t even do an imitation – or a voice of a famous person.

She’s just . . . . . bad.
That’s what she’s celebrated for.

Feminists get a real kick out of being bad, unfunny, untalented, and providing zero value. Not even entertainment value!

<iframe width=”500″ height=”281″ src=”https://www.youtube.com/embed/OzsGmdmhDTI?feature=oembed” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen=””></iframe>

Why would anyone want to see that? People are paying for Netflix, so they could be entertained, not sickened. Looking at Amy made me almost want to throw up!

Marriage and Divorce for a man is like getting a cactus shoved up your ass. It’s painful with all the spines that go in and it is painful getting all the spines out, meanwhile Wifey gets most of the money, your home, your kids, and practically everything you own.

[Anonymous 6]

Ranger One wrote:

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

I mean Amy Schumer has no doubt hit the f~~~ing wall. “Leather Special?” more like “Trash Bag” Special. She looks like a f~~~ing trash bag. Or Maybe she is a trash bag because she is a filthy disgusting SLUT!

Her vagina is probably a microbiologist’s wet dream. Like some kind of Petrie dish buffet.

Just the vag? You sir are being a gentleman. She’s clearly got stuff growing in more holes than a bowling alley.

[OldBillParticipant]

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

I wonder why Netflix devoted so much money to her. You don’t see them doing that with Gabriel Iglesias or Bill Burr, comedians with actual talent!

It was a Netflix original production, they owned the content so they promoted it. While Netflix has produced, and therefore owned, specials with Burr and other comics in the past, the usual practice would have Netflix pay those comics for the distribution rights to the comics’ independent productions. In those cases, Netflix wouldn’t own the content and you want to own content.

Netflix has moving into content production for years how with shows like House of Cards and others. Schumer’s special is just one example of that, albeit poorly timed example.

Schumer broke through very quickly, peeked, and collapsed just as rapidly. There are a few reasons why she flamed out so fast; her material, even the stuff she steals, isn’t very good and there’s a growing backlash towards all the “Because Vagina” types. The ‘net helped too. First it made her famous, then it exposed her as a fat untalented fraud whining about misogyny on Twitter.

If Netflix had got that special out even a few months earlier, it may have done better. By the time it did come out, however, more people were hating on Schumer than enjoying her “work”.

That production delay also explains why Schumer has appeared in a few movies despite the public dropping her – the movies were made while she was still red hot career wise only to be released after she tanked.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[IRuleMeParticipant]

The highlight of her career was showing her boob in that s~~~ty movie with Goldie Hawn. She sucks, she’s not funny, and she’s grossly unattractive.

[Anonymous 6]

IRuleMe wrote:

The highlight of her career was showing her boob in that s~~~ty movie with Goldie Hawn. She sucks, she’s not funny, and she’s grossly unattractive.

While I know the name and generally know of her shtick I really don’t know much of her career. I have a few questions, how popular was she in the 1st place? For how long? When did the crash happen for her?

The irony here is that way back Andrew Dice Clay was the potty mouth comic and was protested by feminist groups. Sam Kineson to some degree too. Now Amy Schumer is doing a horrible version of the Diceman’s act from over 20 years ago. Stupid bitch. Dice is funny, still is. Lady Gaga ripped off her entire act from at least two other musical groups and clearly Amy Schumer has ripped hers off too. Go strong and independent women!

[OldBillParticipant]

Anonymous wrote:

Now Amy Schumer is doing a horrible version of the Diceman’s act from over 20 years ago.

Clay got that act from a nightclub comic of the 40s and 50s called B.S. Pulley. The B.S. stood for bullsh*t. Pulley occasionally did an act with a midget called H.S. Gump. You should be able to figure out what the H.S. stood for.

Pulley was (in)famous for working “blue”. In an era where nightclubs would have signs backstage cautioning emcees and comics not to say “hell” or “damn”, Pulley was routinely dropping f-bombs on stage. He got away with it because he mostly worked in burlesque and, when he didn’t, he worked venues where the attraction was the fact he dropped f-bombs.

Lots of comedians worked “blue” in private or rehearsals only to work clean in public. Red Skelton, for example, was famous for holding an absolutely filthy rehearsal a couple of hours before his broadcast TV show. Celebs, stars, Broadway folks, and others would show up just to watch the rehearsal.

Anyway, all comedians steal material to some extent or another. Milton Berle was notorious for it for decades, Robin Williams did it quite a bit, and, before Schumer, Carlos Mencia was the modern poster child for it. It’s what you do with material after you steal it that matters. Schumer steals most of her stuff and then can’t present it effectively.

Do not date. Do not impregnate. Do not co-habitate. Above all, do not marry. Reclaim and never again surrender your personal sovereignty.

[phoenixgod1995Participant 3352]

Women belong in the Kitchen, not comedy! Female Comedians are rare, good ones are even rarer…

Marriage and Divorce for a man is like getting a cactus shoved up your ass. It’s painful with all the spines that go in and it is painful getting all the spines out, meanwhile Wifey gets most of the money, your home, your kids, and practically everything you own.

[phoenixgod1995Participant 3352]

Keymaster wrote:

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

I wonder why Netflix devoted so much money to her.

Because she’s the perfect feminist slut train wreck icon. Fat. Unattractive. Fills her “act” with garbage. STARRED in a movie called “train wreck”. Jokes about being a pedophile in the first 45 seconds. SARCASITIC AS F~~~ and women love that because they think looking petulant and brackish makes them look “interesting” when she really has nothing to offer.

Not even talent!! She can’t even do an imitation – or a voice of a famous person.

She’s just . . . . . bad.
That’s what she’s celebrated for.

Feminists get a real kick out of being bad, unfunny, untalented, and providing zero value. Not even entertainment value!

<iframe width=”500″ height=”281″ src=”https://www.youtube.com/embed/OzsGmdmhDTI?feature=oembed” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen=””></iframe>

Scream Singing? These animals sound more like monkeys.

This is what real scream singing sounds like. Notice the difference?

Marriage and Divorce for a man is like getting a cactus shoved up your ass. It’s painful with all the spines that go in and it is painful getting all the spines out, meanwhile Wifey gets most of the money, your home, your kids, and practically everything you own.

[MonkParticipant 16991]

phoenixgod1995 wrote:

She can’t go 2 minutes without making a joke about her disgusting vagina.

Take the hole away and what has she to say? What is she?

Nothing.

It amuses me every time they self-identify as nothing more than a hole.

[NerdTunnelerParticipant]

Because comedy requires intelligence…

I stand with feet apart and let my balls hang free...Manginas dont have balls...See how they stand and sit at the whim of their masters...

[Author]

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