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Hello everyone…it feels great to have found this website and message board. Despite being in a bad marriage (are there good ones anymore?), I feel surprisingly optimistic. Why you may ask? Well I am planning my escape and looking forward to my future for the first time since I can remember.
The marriage:
Married for almost 20 years and we are both in our mid-40s and have a wonderful 14-year old son. I can’t remember the last time we had sex or had any type of intimacy but I don’t miss it at all to be honest. Like most women my wife is extremely selfish, including in the bedroom. I would be lucky to get 1 or 2 BJs a year but when we used to regularly have sex I would go down on her almost every time until she had an orgasm before intercourse. Makes me sick thinking about doing that now. Every single time I was the one initiating sex and finally just got tired of trying and making all the effort. I forced myself to eat her out a few months ago and discovered her pussy now stinks. She always used to have great feminine hygiene and I am too much of a nice guy to tell her about it.
Luckily we never have the huge “blow up” fights (I hate conflict) but is that better than almost no interaction at all? We are basically roommates now but I always try to be respectful to her despite her rudeness. To give my wife credit, she is a hard worker with a decent salary and surprisingly good at not spending much money despite being an entitled bitch. Her constant negativity though is what makes me not want to be around her…it is truly toxic. Despite having a nice house, no debt besides a mortgage, retirement savings, yearly vacations, she drives a nice car, $130 hair styling monthly, nice makeup etc. All her work friends tell her she is lucky to have a nice husband and great lifestyle.
Of course I take care of all responsibilities/maintenance for the house, yard, and cars….on top of that I also manage all the finances (which will benefit me). Embarrassingly like a little bitch I also do most of the domestic work like laundry, dishes, meals, and cleaning. I have never seen a slob like her in all my life but I want to keep a clean house for my son.
I also realize doing all the domestic work contributed to her losing respect for me despite good intentions on my part. She never attends any of my son’s school functions, parent/teacher meetings, volunteering, and medical appointments. All the other mom’s of his classmates joke they never knew my son had a mother…pretty much the truth. I never get a thank you for anything from her. On top of it all, I have an advanced degree and make quite a bit more than her.
My wife is so f~~~ing vain and it’s killing her now that her looks are fading. She is mixed ethnicity and was f~~~ing gorgeous when I met her and still looks pretty good for an older lady despite gaining a few pounds. Now I realize her looks are all that she brought to the table and her s~~~ty personality makes her so ugly to me. She also is a functioning alcoholic and drinks a bottle of wine almost every night. My fantasy is that some rich guy “steals” her away from me because she could still be a trophy wife to somebody.
My red pills:
- Her childhood friend divorced about 4 years ago and moved close to us. My wife started going 4-5 nights/week instead of being with me and our child. I didn’t say much, because we never tried to control each other, but this was too much compared to me going to happy hour with co-workers one night/week.
- Two years ago I came down with a serious illness (30% fatality rate) and had to be admitted for 3 days. I ended up driving myself to the hospital and she visited me once for about 10 minutes over my stay. Interestingly this health scare was the 2nd best thing that ever happened to me (the birth of my son is the best thing). It opened my eyes about our marriage and most importantly made me realize how important my health is. I am in great shape now and
- My mother has severe dementia and is in hospice…she doesn’t have much time left. My wife never visits her or even asks me how she is doing. Even my friends and co-workers inquire every so often – this really p~~~es me off because my mother was always so kind and welcoming since the first time she met my wife.
Going my own way
- I am pleasant and respectful to her but could care less if I upset her. I don’t engage in her rant sessions and try to pacify her like I used to. Basically I don’t give a f~~~ about her feelings because she never cared about mine.
- Most upsetting to her is that I have completely ceased trying to have any type of sexual activity with her. This forum has taught me in her head sex is what she controlled me with. This is seriously f~~~ing (pun intended) f~~~ing with her head…she thinks it’s because of her age and weight gain. I just tell her it feels like my libido has decreased.
- The past few months I have lost over 20 lbs thanks to a low carb diet and feel great about myself. I haven’t weighed 180 lbs and had a 33-inch waist in over 15 years. She doesn’t like this one bit and says I’m too skinny now and look bad. Last week she drunkenly admitted she doesn’t want to be the fat wife seen with the thin husband. Haha tables have turned bitch
- I go out with my three good friends anytime I want but limit it to about twice a week because of my son. They are great guys around my age and pretty much MGTOW without knowing it. They are professionals and good looking but have never been married or had kids. Instead of traditional dating they have a “bull pen” of a few ladies to have casual hook ups with.
- I don’t have any toys like motorcycles, a boat, or a sports car, etc. I don’t spend very much money on myself when it comes to clothes and entertainment. However my one passion is traveling, especially to Asia. There have been family trips and solo trips to places like Vietnam, Malaysia, Vietnam, Indonesia, Korea, Cambodia, and Thailand. As mentioned earlier, one positive about our marriage was that we didn’t try to control each other and I could take some solo trips (2 weeks max) which gave me a huge sense of freedom taking a short break from carrying the entire load at home on top of work. I have 10-day trip planned to Laos in June and for the first time she is busting my b~~~~ over taking a solo trip. I know this is due to her low self esteem and she is nagging me almost daily. I can tell she wants me to cancel but no f~~~ing way in hell that happens…I need this getaway for my sanity. I have finally learned to put my needs first over hers and how good it feels! I am back in control and she just needs to deal with it.
- Coming to the realization that I will be a great father no matter what happens in my marriage. I will never get married again nor get into a serious relationship…all my focus will be on myself and my son.
Anyway sorry to ramble…I never intended to write such a long introduction but hopefully that gives some insight to my situation. I have already been stashing cash away but will need more advice/input on how to prepare for my impending freedom and be posting questions in the appropriate forums. Thanks for reading!
Building the Ship; 1 economics
The first topic I would like to discuss is economics.
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Being the first topic and to grow interest I will explain why I have chosen to discuss such topics and take this path. The notion of society collapsing is on every persons’ mind. Most people including myself have no problem with this happening, empires rise and fall. I do not care if the ship sinks simply because the ship deserves it. However I liked the ship, it has sailed many waters and even though there is plenty of s~~~ I still had fun. Why should we care about making a new ship? After all if the ship sinks then people smarter than me will design a new ship then all will be fine again. In order for me to answer this question I have to know, who will design the ship? and what will the new ship be like? I love having a ship, it beats the hell out of swimming in the ocean. The ocean will swallow up a person rather quickly after all and that fear is what keeps bad leaders in power. However the problem is, is that it very likely that the new ship will be built almost identical to the old ship and that is something I would like to avoid. Even if the ship does not sink I do not want to continue maintaining it. Does any MGTOW want to live in a place in which he has little say in most aspects of his life, especially his labor? Designing a new ship is difficult, history can prove that, but it can and will be worth it. The United States is a perfect example and I am glad to have been born in it. We are not forced to design a new ship, democracies are great because it is a system that facilitates such change. The reason I propose the designing of a new ship is that I do not think that the system will be able to change sufficiently and in a timely manner for the proposals I have in mind.
As a new MGTOW I recently learned of gynocentrism and hypergamy. These traits can be changed if there is a greater alternative system that promotes different behaviors. Evolution tells us, as time passes traits that lead to success will be passed on to the next generation and behaviors can become traits. These traits will never change as long as it is successful and MGTOW is the result of these crude traits being successful. We have a choice, we can choose to stand still and die out or move forward. Which direction is forward is something that we have to be continuously thinking about, that is survival. When trying to change any basic trait you first have to satisfy the basic needs of a person, food, shelter, and clothing, in a different way. These basic needs are why men have created civilizations in the first place and are the things women try to gain from us with as little work as possible. Over time women went from negotiation to exploitation and with the advent of money there became a single item to acquire. This appears to be common knowledge for MGTOWs. Now the hard part is what traits do we want and how can we promote the behaviors to make those traits. Gynocentrism and hypergamy is something that is no longer necessary for our survival, but the systems based on these are still in place.
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The world has a fixed number of resources. This scientific fact means that we cannot have whatever we want. The allocation of these resources is essential to the well being of the population. Supply and demand is the old testament of economics. I like to call it the old testament not because it is old but because it was developed in a world that no longer exists, is not rooted in science, and has a sizable religious following. Science was applied later and just made a mess. The biggest problem I have with supply and demand is that it encourages the exploitation and destruction of resources. Although many laws have been developed to curb those tendencies, the behavior is still remains. Look at the bloated industrial machine that is now the United States and you can see how these behaviors reek havoc on the world and everything in it. I see this as the finally of supply and demand in economics. Sustainability is the only logical choice of a civilization. Why would you live in a place where food could disappear at any moment? The Earth has a limit to how many healthy sustainable lives can fit in it and supply and demand can not efficiently determine this limit. This limit changes with technology and with nature. When this limit is reached supply and demand will force us into self destruction where survival of the fittest returns. That is my observation of supply and demand. With such a result and one that can happen in 50 years how will we grow as humans? What is the point of growth if we might destroy ourselves when we peak?
I propose that all resources are divided equally among every person on the planet. These resources are not given away, but there is a max limit to the resources a single person can acquire, a planned division. This limit can be increased, but never decreased. With defined limits it is becomes possible to achieve equality and promotes recycling. These resources belong to that person at that person alone until they die. These resources passed down upon death to the new generation. It can be to their grandson/daughter, great grandson/daughter, or even to a the child of a good friend. Each person will have to prove that they are capable of living alone to gain a limit of land, such as a college degree. Each person can only have one child to their name, so a couple can have two children at most. People die by accident which makes free space. If the parents do not wish to make another child then a person can gain that spot through whatever means society wants to make, lottery is fair, and that person can add another child to their name. This is strategy makes living sustainable and easier as time progresses. Once the limit is hit our society will change from acquiring resources to using them more efficiently and that is the goal. It is also possible for people to pool resource limits together to do whatever they wish. For example space mining, 1000 people build a ship to collect beyond earth resources to raise their limit. They reach their new limit and trade then trade the ship for the raw materials or recycle it. Cities and commercial buildings are built with shared resources. One possible system is that each home unit comes with an inventory of the amount of resources placed in the city. These home units and be traded. For example, in city A the city was built with 20% of the resources in the limit and city B is 15%. It allows for cities to be diverse and can even be 0%. Cities can trade raw materials to ensure people can acquire their limits. City A has an iron mine and city B has an aluminum mine. All manufacturing is done within the city so that only raw materials are transferred. Products are only generated within the city to guarantee recycling capabilities, if the city can make it then the city can unmake it. The only exception would be shared products like the rocket for space mining. This system does not need money since it is resource and labor based. The long term benefit of this system is that it seamlessly integrates mechanized labor. As technology gets more advanced and labor becomes more mechanized, people are loosing their jobs or pay. As a city becomes more mechanized the only consequence is that less work needs to be done, since the labor is not exchanged for money. The carpenter works for the blacksmith and vise versa. If the people choose to pool their resources to work mechanization then work can be completely automated. The key point in this system is that theft becomes pointless since there is no material superiority. Gynocentrism and hypergamy will not be able to function in this system.
If you find this to be a great idea then I will continue using it in my project.
Topic: Publicly Attacked Last Night
Last night was attacked publicly by this crazy woman. She said I attacked her, but she wouldn’t listen. I’d like to tell you my story. I’ll call her Mrs. Crazy.
So, I was at my favorite Italian restaurant last night. There was this pregnant woman who’s pretty in third trimester. She’s not the crazy lady. I’ll call her Mrs. Preggo.
I find pregnancy fascinating but being a single man, I really don’t have a woman to talk to about this. So I was asking her questions. I was starting on my first glass of wine that night. I teased her a little, did a little banter. She seemed fine.
Mrs. Crazy is there. She’s involved with the conversation. She’s nice and polite. I tease her too. A little banter and some joking about drinking well pregnant. She fired back a little and I took it. I even made fun of myself with it.
As the conversation went on, I talked about nutrition and other aspects of pregnancy and I do learn some things about pregnancy that day from her. I told her that women in third world countries die just because of a lack of vitamins. All you need is a prenatal (it’s also impossible to eat enough for the nutritional needs). Mrs. Crazy interjects and tries to protect Ms. Preggo as if I was making her feel nervious, or something. I defend myself by saying she’s fine since she’s in America. Ms. Preggo mentions that she takes her pre-natals. Unfortunately, Mrs. Crazy doesn’t let me get a word in and talks over me. She doesn’t give me a chance. I hold my position. I feel I’m right. Mrs. Crazy still has her happy face on.
Anyways, after about my third glass of wine. Mrs. Crazy appears to me and looks me straight in the eye, “You attacked me.” I am surprised to hear this. And she goes on. The things I said about her daughter and such about all that (her daughter seemed totally fine, I met her, nice gal), she took personally. I give her a chance. Obviously, she took my banter seriously and personally.
I attempt to explain, but she won’t let me finish a single sentence. She cuts me off, demonstrate total misunderstanding. I told her it was banter, she’s like “No, that wasn’t banter.” (OK, I got that much in). I tried to tell her that I was open to her response, but I couldn’t even explain that. I could only get, “I’m open to…” I wanted to spell out that if I open up like that, then that invites her to respond should she chose. She won’t listen. She just won’t listen.
Eventually I tire of her. I’m not even hurt or anything, but I’m done. So, when the staff walk by, I immediately call out to them, “This woman is harassing me.” I failed to notice the man who was standing there the whole time. When she said to them that I was an asshole (or attacking her, can’t remember what she said exactly), he said, “I’m a witness to this.” I’m not even bothered by him. Already she’s proven herself irrational and unreasonable. Because at this point she is. She doubles the nastiness. She calls me a coward and all this other crap. I call out for staff again, “She’s still harassing me.” They acknowledge.
After a few minutes of her crap, I pull out my phone and begin to dial 911. She starts realizing she’s not getting what she wants. I haven’t fired back at her, I’ve only attempted to explain myself. I didn’t call her names or anything. That man watches the whole thing, doesn’t even try to mediate or say, “Hold on, I think he wants to explain himself. We should give him a chance. I would like to here this.” Instead, he stands behind her and backs her up. She starts throwing things at me like, “You were looking at that PREGNANT woman…” yadda yadda like I viciously attacked a defenseless pregnant woman and raped her, cutting out her baby and forcing her to eat it or so. She even manages to throw “ugly” at me, as if it was that and my lack of money that make women stay away from me.
She eventually does leave, and after she found out that there were going to be some consequences if she doesn’t back off. So, I got labeled a coward, an asshole, and worse, I’m a sexual predator against pregnant women.
So, when they finally leave, I go back to my sipping and begin analyzing the situation. By now I have 3 glasses in me, which probably helped me stay focused on this woman and listening to her. I think worst case scenario I’m guilty of being gauche or a foux pas, which I’ve done before.
As it turns out, I know the staff there. I’ve been eating there for over a year now. I love those people. They’ve given me rides home before. Anyways, one of the staff told me that I argued with a woman. You never do that, he says, they’re irrational and you’ll never win. He gives me extra wine, FYI. The owner is going to buy me a free wine glass too later on. So I kind of had a bit much that night. Anyways, what he says is that the woman was jealous. She’s not all that good looking. Mrs. Preggo is though. So, Mrs. Crazy had a reaction and lost her s~~~. I picked up on that she wasn’t dealing with the information I was giving her, instead, she’d cut me off and sort what she heard, which is only what she expected to hear. She didn’t even know what banter was, she said that that’s what we’re doing (in the time that she was presenting her case to me).
I don’t deny that that man witnessed the material facts and got them right, but I am clueless to what he decide to do and why. He could have just pulled me a side and said, “Buddy, that my friend there was hurt by you. This is what she said about you and I saw that. She feels attacked. Care to explain yourself?” I could have even then.
Anyways, so I call him Mr. White Knight. He’s a brave warrior, noble, and virtuous. I will strive to be like him. I will first begin by sacrificing my testicles to The Goddess, who is most blessed and pure.
Back to the staff, who continued his explanation, that women do tend to be irrational. He sites a source, a wealthy woman who’s a billionaire who is highly intelligent and cannot lose in an argument. She states that women are irrational at times due to PMS. She says you cannot reason with them.
I know most men here won’t consider another women ever again, but what about a billionaire woman like this? Doesn’t that make you wonder if the NAWALT might exist?
I know this staffer to be an honest man, who was destroyed in a previous divorce and lost .5 million over the life of his child support. So, I feel sorry for him. Another staffer also told me he was divorced.
Finally, the women who drove me home that night, I asked her if it is true what they said, she even said that there are times she thinks she shouldn’t show up to work because she’s too cantankerous that day.
Today I thought about what happened. I think Mrs. Crazy just has borderline personality disorder, for the reasons that around her you have to walk on eggshells. I wasn’t allowed to break the taboos of talking about pregnancy or anything. I’ve talked about pregnancy with women in front of a whole bunch of tradcons back in the day. She was well-informed and I was fascinated to hear what she had to say. Imagine all the poor souls overhearing this, and suffering in silence since they cannot handle this information.
I do suspect Mrs. Crazy liked me and was jealous when I talked with Mrs. Preggo. She wanted to interject and get some of my attention. She totally misunderstood me because she does not understand men. She’s also seriously insecure. I touched her insecurities. I will admit that I feel sorry for hurting her, even though she’s a nasty piece of s~~~, and proved it well.
I also think she’s in a seriously dysfunctional marriage and I’ve seen this before. Another woman, who was my ex’s mother acted much the same way, but she didn’t do that same cutting off/sorting crap, and she understood my humor. She didn’t have Borderline Personality Disorder, I don’t believe. My ex’s mother was seriously messed up and really hurt me bad, but I’m giving the devil his due. She had serious issues and one of the patterns is that she did have reactions. She was way smarter and coherent than Mrs. Crazy ever was.
So, my ex’s mother was in a nasty marriage. I thought she was just a controlling bitch to her emasculated husband, but as it turns out he’s not that nice of a person. He would cut her down and make her feel insecure. He really screwed with her. They did it to each other. When they divorced I gloated but now that’s over, and I’m happy that the marriage is over because it was that sick. Her family was so dysfunctional, like her brothers and sisters. How f~~~ed up they were.
Therefore, while Mrs. Crazy has a personality disorder and treated me with total s~~~, she is in a dysfunctional family, and whomever Mr. White Knight was, I’m sure he’s related, and he’s in a dysfunctional family too (probably same family, I don’t know, don’t even care). Super rigid gender-roles, etc.
Mrs. Crazy was definitely projecting like all hell. She stuck all her worst on me and attacked me, just like the Phantom from Phantom of the Opera in the end where he smashes the mirrors. He can’t stand his own face. She saw her lack of femininity, my interest in that other woman (which wasn’t sexual at all), the banter, and everything. Then she tried to make me feel like what she always feels (I haven’t figured out what she feels overall, and I probably won’t). Then she ends up doing exactly what she accused me of, and attacks. She also refused to listen and probably over pride.
Thanks for reading this story. This is Mr. Sexual Predator with a Fetish for Pregnant Women who attacks total strangers, a coward, and probably a few other things signing out.
Recently I have had confusion on my life. I guess it’s because I’m young, and I still have no idea where I’ll end up. Lately I relapsed, watched How I met Your Mother, listened to many “love” songs, and had emotional bonds with a couple of my ex girlfriends. Truth be told I am not sure what I need to do anymore, before the path was clear, go my own way and eventually ghost out of society. Might just be the plantation trying to pull me back into it’s icy grasp, yet I am still very confused about everything. I decided I’m going to practice what I preach, and truly go my own way. While the red pill has never truly left my system, the blue pill is some how out powering it right now. And even though I know about the danger, I need to try. Right now I’m a freshman in college, and haven’t gotten laid since I left my previous country, upon arrival I took the red pill, so it changed me a lot. Up to this point my girlfriends never lasted longer than a month, I either grew bored or they cheated, never even gotten to “official”. So, to cut to the chase, I need one final mistake to get the blue pill out of my system, most likely a long term relationship. No marriage or kids, no way in hell, but one final mistake that will put my mind to rest and this blue pill out of my system. Any advice?
I’ve been meaning to do this for a while now, but it’s a long story and I want to trim it down without losing too much others may find valuable So here it goes. I was raised in a far right wing, and heavily traditionalist household. I was raised Mormon which is a mind-f~~~ to say the least. My mother had some mental issues somewhere in the bi-polar spectrum with a heavy dose of an explosive disorder. My home was inhabited by a screeching abusive banshee on a regular basis. My father silently struggled with PTSD since he was drafted to Vietnam, they both had issues and without bashing them I think it is fair to say that neither of them should have had any children, they had nine anyway. I was a younger child in the long line.
When I told my father I was going to be the first male son to not go on a Mormon mission because I wasn’t really sold on the religion myself, he made it clear that I should find somewhere else to go, so I enlisted the Army. I served my time in co-ed units nearly always being under the command of several females in varying levels of the chain of command. To make a short story of it, I would not wish a female NCO on anyone; just f~~~ing awful. Also I have glossed over several of the more typical MGTOW events: manipulative relationships, depression, recurring suicidal impulses, and a host of gender double standards I experienced before, during, and after my military service. Including a girlfriend who got pregnant and had an abortion against my indoctrinated wishes, she was such a whore I strongly suspect now that it wasn’t mine in the first place; so dodged a bullet there.
I got married as I prepared to leave the army, but that only lasted a few years before she walked out on me. Typical story, she was everything I wanted and sexually insatiable before we were married. After the “I do’s” she became aggressive, abusive, nearly-celibate, and all-around intolerable. She decided to try to reign me in by playing the walk-out game, and I was so tired of her s~~~ that I let her go. I filled out and filed the divorce papers myself and never involved a lawyer. She signed the papers without drama, the divorce was clean, and again I dodged a bullet.
I was going to college and had a good deal of feminist propaganda and lies pushed on me, it took me a few years to really start to dismantle those lies (but at-least college did help me free myself from the remaining threads of religious dogma that were stitched into me). Every relationship I had was toxic and I removed myself from the dating pool for a few years. I was enjoying being single until I was snatched up by another Chameleon. This one was an older single mother so she tried extra hard to keep up the facade, but it broke too early and she quickly became highly controlling.
I was disillusioned with it when I finally first saw the MGTOW acronym online. It described what I was doing before the single mom got her claws in me. It was the life I wanted back. I became more aggressive in disagreement with her, knowing she wouldn’t tolerate her lap-dog disobeying his training. It worked like a charm and she closed the door on the relationship. It was my plan to have her leave me as a precaution to her getting the rejection-rage. Another bullet dodged. So by some miracle here I am divorced with no alimony and no kids. In short I am now a single, happy, stable, MGTOW. I have no interest in dating and have not had any in quite some time, I intend to remain a MGTOW-Monk for the rest of my life. Thanks for reading through all of this. I hope it might help some of the younger guys know that even when it seems dark and hopeless there can be value in struggling through another day – each day.Warning spoiler alert if you’re into House of Cards. Just watched the final episode of the House of Cards Season 3. In the finale, Clare Underwood, the first lady, wife of Francis Underwood, President, decides to leave him just as he is at the early stages of a successful pre-election campaign.
I know this is fiction, but it cuts close to reality, it got me thinking. How many times a woman decides to go drama queen and pull the plug, just as the man is under the most pressure trying to forge ahead and overcome significant obstacles.
Its like they’re waiting for the most stressful difficult time for the man as an opportune moment to get the maximum destabilizing f~~~ you effect, for their deceitful, underhanded treachery.
In the past, whenever a woman has given me trouble, it always seems to come at the most inconvenient of times, when I’m under the most stress, dealing with big issues that I’ve invariably taken on for the greater good of our combined futures.
Perhaps it’s because they crave the attention, and feel ignored when the focus is on the challenges rather than them?
Maybe it is partly as a result of the stress that major challenges invariably bring on a relationship.
I have come to believe its a natural part of women’s nature to pursue a nice life together, in order to get the maximum effect when they f~~~ things up to high heaven, it’s something they can’t control or avoid, it’s manifestly a part of them, like hypergamy.
I know MGTOW is all out of F~~~s to give, but it’s just another reminder why I’m better off without being chained to a destabilizing, vagina, ready to erupt all sorts of chaos. Feminism is also the provision of endless temporary promiscuous vagina, so f~~~ the plantation and take your place on the carousel, life has never been better for a free man unburdened by the elimination of old fashioned values.When the war cemeteries are half full of the corpses of dead conscripted women, only then will women have earned the right to speak of equality. Sidecar “A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” - Bob Dylan

