Getting up to leave, she walked towards the front door, which I held open for her. Upon reaching the threshold she went nuts, attempting to punch and strike me in the head repeatedly in a frenzy. In defence, I simply extended my arms and pushed her away from me. However being a fat clumsy thing, she tripped and fell, grazing her arm on the outside wall in the process. She begged to be let back in to tend to her ‘wound’. Needless to say I didn’t think this was a good idea. Eventually she got the idea and went on her merry way, and I thought little more of it.

Two days later, a knock at the door. It’s the police. He asks to come in and speak to me. Feeling I have nothing to hide, I consent. We sit and talk; he explains that my crazy ex has called the police alleging I have assaulted her. As ‘proof’ she cites her ‘wounds’ – a small graze on her upper arm. I’ll always remember what the police said: “it’s clearly assault”. Clearly??! I did what I needed to do to stay safe:I lied out of my backside, and denied having pushed her in any way, gave her as much of a character assassination as I could, telling him that she was a drunk who often fell over while p~~~ed up and frequently had cuts and scrapes from these incidents, and called him out on the claim that this bitch’s graze implied any wrongdoing on my part.

In the end the case was dropped due to lack of evidence and no further action was taken. But it taught me a valuable lesson. When it comes to the police, always deny everything. The police will always side with the woman in any domestic incident. An when it comes to women, be very, very careful, because they can attack you and  still come out of it with the official status of ‘victim’.

Some guys here think I might be nuts when I always say

Don’t go near women. Don’t look at them, talk to them or f~~~ them.

The majority of women have … to a greater or lesser degree …. mental health issues.

The law is now written by them for them. Men are the target in the gynocentric holocaust.

You can save yourself and other by ….. just not putting dick in them.

Get a hooker.

….. and welcome ☺

In the end the case was dropped due to lack of evidence and no further action was taken.

Whew!

ShierPrism wrote:

When it comes to the police, always deny everything.

More than one of my lawyer friends have told me the same. One instructed me to always say, “I deny it” as a stock response. In the US, you can demand a lawyer it they try to escalate … and if you have $50K burning a hole in your pocket, then you can get a competent one.

I have a lawyer’s business card in my wallet just in case. He will spring me from the clink for an amount I can afford. Perish forbid I ever need him. We pal around while he’s off work, and I am fortunate to know him.

Edit: I want to underscore this.

You do not ever, not ever, argue with a cop. It’s all mild tones of voice, non-aggressive body language, and “Officer” or “Sir.” And, of course, “I deny it.”

There may be cases where “I deny it” obviously won’t work. Then use something like “he tried to kill me,” or whatever the situation demands.
Always set the scene as either you did nothing, or you were defending life and limb.

Thus spake my lawyer pals.

Upon hearing this, my previous girlfriend came around to my flat uninvited.

WHY would you let her in? She’s your EX-girlfriend. That should mean something. One chance. Per chick. Per lifetime. She already had hers.

The instant you start having trouble with a woman, any woman, call the police. Let them deal with her. More importantly, calling the police first starts the legal paper trail with your side of the story. That’s important.